Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > Vinegar and Baking Soda
Admitting you're Stronger in London Town
This isn't a summary as much as an announcement: ANYONE out there who's been raped, you should at least talk about it some one person. As long as you talk, alright? Your friends are there to help....
?Blocked
Twice. I'd nearly been raped TWICE. You know, the first time around, you're proud you beat the shit out of the guy, and hold your head high and proud. You actually rant and gloat around like a peacock showing its feathers. But the second time... It's not as fun. Or thrilling. 'Specially when you're a girl, a person like me, who's always fought her way out of situation where violence was the only way out. It terrified me to think that I was unable to defend myself anymore.
That I depended on someone else.
That I was dependant.
"You okay..?" Gerard whispered, taking my cold, shaking hands in his own. We'd sat back down to a table, a few people still around me for comfort.
"Do you want the white lie that makes everything seem alright and good or the heart-breaking truth?" I asked with a fake smile, tightening my grip on his hands.
"White lie?" He said with a nervous chuckled, giving my hands a comforting squeeze again.
"I feel ready to fight any other bastard that comes my way and I most certainly do NOT feel dependant of defenceless." I said with a smile, again, sighing and letting my head fall on the table.
"Come on, it can't be that bad... Can it?" a woman beside me asked, rubbing my back. "I mean, you DIDN'T get... raped... So, that's a good thing, right? It means you can still get out of a tight spot!" she encouraged, although it made nothing to lighten my mood.
I WAS WEAK,
Twice! God, didn't people understand..?! Okay, so yeah, they didn't know this was my second time around the block, but I mean...
Stop trying to reassure me and let me die in my stupid little CORNER, DAMN!
"Come on Fye, let's head back..." Gerard said in a hushed tone, lightly tugging on my hands. I looked up at him, sighed, and pushed myself up.
"Call me, okay?" The woman said, handing me a card with her number on it. "I really want to keep in touch. Okay?" She smiled, and I just couldn't help but smile in return.
"Sure thing... Mrs. London." I said, taking a glance at the card to see her name.
"Oh, please! Just call me Mary!"
~~~~~~~~~*~
"WHAT THE FUCK?!" Frank cried, hanging up instantly and running outside. He snatched his cellphone and called up Bob, telling him what'd happened and ordering him to call Ray. Mikey already knew; after all, he WAS with Gerard.
You see... A few minutes into walking home from the Café, I'd collapsed. My knees just buckled and my legs gave in. Bam. Just like that. I have a hunch as to what it might be...
We call that stress.
You see, I've always had this problem with my body and physical and mental needs. Whenever I'm tired, I don't just yawn and get drowsy. NOOOOO, we're talking about ME. My nose is runny, my eyes turn into two replicas of the Niagara Falls, I have the KILLER headaches... Sometimes, when I'm tired enough, I can even get rashes.
When I'm stressed out, I have migraines, back pains, I'm often dizzy, I can't think straight and I'm tired.
Always tired.
It's like my body's desperate to find a way to calm down, to let go of all that stress. Sleep, dreams are the only way to get to that point.
I guess I'm a little overexerted because of school, kendo classes that I've started, AND all this shit about Anton and getting raped...
Then, I was in the hospital. Not because of the stress(well, maybe a LITTLE because of that...), but mainly because, when I fell, my knee split open, and I had a minor concussion.
YAY my stupid stressed-out self.
"Dude, I came as soon as I heard!" Frank called, the minute he came into the room, four or five nurses coming in after him.
"...Uh, he's with me?" I said sheepishly, and all five women sighed and returned to their... Well, whatever it was they were doing.
"What the fuck happened Fye?!" he cried, snatching a chair, sitting beside the bed. So I told him. Everything I'd told Gerard.
From the stress and tired thing to the rapes. And self-confidence that was now officially at MINUS FOURTY FOUR. When I was done, he came to speak, but Ray and Bob barged in, dragging Mikey along, since he was at school, and had just finished.
I didn't wait for them to ask what happened before I restarted my 'epic tale'. Mikey just kept on nodding comprehensively; if anyone, he would understand everything I'm going through, and just what I meant, where other misunderstood.
Or didn't understand PERIOD.
"...so then I hit my head against the sidewalk and here I am..!" I ended with fake enthusiasm and a smile that was just as fake, before sighing and closing my eyes. "I'm hopeless AND weak..!"
That's when I felt two strong hands pulling me up in the hospital bed.
"Shut up that fucking mouth if it's only going to say shit about you." Ray said harshly, and I could see Frank, Bob, Mikey and Gerard nodding from the corner of my eyes. "You're a freaking awesome girl, Fye! I mean, you beat the crap out of the jocks more than once, you saved our asses(but mostly Mikey's) more times than we can count, you got out of the fucking most WEIRD situations we ever heard of, and you're just plain awesome! Don't take shit from anyone. Got it? Not even yourself."
I stared at him for a while, before sighing and smiling.
"Does that mean I'll have to beat myself if I say I'm weak?"
"Oh!! MAN! That would be some freaking- OW!"
"Frank, shut the fuck up." Mikey snickered, after having punched the hyperactive 'man' in the shoulder.
Might be young, but Mini Way had THE punch..!
~~~~~~~~~*~
"Uh... Y-yeah, that's him." I answered the police officer, who'd just walked in the art class. He promptly took Anton out of the class, and now the only thing left of him was his art, and the last glare I would ever receive from him.
I held Gerard's hand all along. I was so... SCARED. I didn't want anything to happen to him, but, at the same time, I didn't want anything else to happen to ME. I don't know what I'd do if that ever happened again.
There was a moment's silence in the class...
Before someone started clapping. Applauding me.
The rest of the class followed.
I was proud again.
I was me again.
I was still dependant...
But at least, WE were strong.
~~~~~~~~~*~
Mary London here! I'm not home now, so please leave a message after the beep please!
"Hey, Mary? It's Fye. I had stress problems getting out of the Café. I wound up at the hospital for a minor concussion. I'm fine now. You know when I said I was weak? I'm not anymore. I resented myself for being dependant... But I'm stronger with Gerard. Well, anyways... Call me back when you can, okay? I think I'd like to have coffee with you... Eh, scratch that. Tea sound good?"
That I depended on someone else.
That I was dependant.
"You okay..?" Gerard whispered, taking my cold, shaking hands in his own. We'd sat back down to a table, a few people still around me for comfort.
"Do you want the white lie that makes everything seem alright and good or the heart-breaking truth?" I asked with a fake smile, tightening my grip on his hands.
"White lie?" He said with a nervous chuckled, giving my hands a comforting squeeze again.
"I feel ready to fight any other bastard that comes my way and I most certainly do NOT feel dependant of defenceless." I said with a smile, again, sighing and letting my head fall on the table.
"Come on, it can't be that bad... Can it?" a woman beside me asked, rubbing my back. "I mean, you DIDN'T get... raped... So, that's a good thing, right? It means you can still get out of a tight spot!" she encouraged, although it made nothing to lighten my mood.
I WAS WEAK,
Twice! God, didn't people understand..?! Okay, so yeah, they didn't know this was my second time around the block, but I mean...
Stop trying to reassure me and let me die in my stupid little CORNER, DAMN!
"Come on Fye, let's head back..." Gerard said in a hushed tone, lightly tugging on my hands. I looked up at him, sighed, and pushed myself up.
"Call me, okay?" The woman said, handing me a card with her number on it. "I really want to keep in touch. Okay?" She smiled, and I just couldn't help but smile in return.
"Sure thing... Mrs. London." I said, taking a glance at the card to see her name.
"Oh, please! Just call me Mary!"
~~~~~~~~~*~
"WHAT THE FUCK?!" Frank cried, hanging up instantly and running outside. He snatched his cellphone and called up Bob, telling him what'd happened and ordering him to call Ray. Mikey already knew; after all, he WAS with Gerard.
You see... A few minutes into walking home from the Café, I'd collapsed. My knees just buckled and my legs gave in. Bam. Just like that. I have a hunch as to what it might be...
We call that stress.
You see, I've always had this problem with my body and physical and mental needs. Whenever I'm tired, I don't just yawn and get drowsy. NOOOOO, we're talking about ME. My nose is runny, my eyes turn into two replicas of the Niagara Falls, I have the KILLER headaches... Sometimes, when I'm tired enough, I can even get rashes.
When I'm stressed out, I have migraines, back pains, I'm often dizzy, I can't think straight and I'm tired.
Always tired.
It's like my body's desperate to find a way to calm down, to let go of all that stress. Sleep, dreams are the only way to get to that point.
I guess I'm a little overexerted because of school, kendo classes that I've started, AND all this shit about Anton and getting raped...
Then, I was in the hospital. Not because of the stress(well, maybe a LITTLE because of that...), but mainly because, when I fell, my knee split open, and I had a minor concussion.
YAY my stupid stressed-out self.
"Dude, I came as soon as I heard!" Frank called, the minute he came into the room, four or five nurses coming in after him.
"...Uh, he's with me?" I said sheepishly, and all five women sighed and returned to their... Well, whatever it was they were doing.
"What the fuck happened Fye?!" he cried, snatching a chair, sitting beside the bed. So I told him. Everything I'd told Gerard.
From the stress and tired thing to the rapes. And self-confidence that was now officially at MINUS FOURTY FOUR. When I was done, he came to speak, but Ray and Bob barged in, dragging Mikey along, since he was at school, and had just finished.
I didn't wait for them to ask what happened before I restarted my 'epic tale'. Mikey just kept on nodding comprehensively; if anyone, he would understand everything I'm going through, and just what I meant, where other misunderstood.
Or didn't understand PERIOD.
"...so then I hit my head against the sidewalk and here I am..!" I ended with fake enthusiasm and a smile that was just as fake, before sighing and closing my eyes. "I'm hopeless AND weak..!"
That's when I felt two strong hands pulling me up in the hospital bed.
"Shut up that fucking mouth if it's only going to say shit about you." Ray said harshly, and I could see Frank, Bob, Mikey and Gerard nodding from the corner of my eyes. "You're a freaking awesome girl, Fye! I mean, you beat the crap out of the jocks more than once, you saved our asses(but mostly Mikey's) more times than we can count, you got out of the fucking most WEIRD situations we ever heard of, and you're just plain awesome! Don't take shit from anyone. Got it? Not even yourself."
I stared at him for a while, before sighing and smiling.
"Does that mean I'll have to beat myself if I say I'm weak?"
"Oh!! MAN! That would be some freaking- OW!"
"Frank, shut the fuck up." Mikey snickered, after having punched the hyperactive 'man' in the shoulder.
Might be young, but Mini Way had THE punch..!
~~~~~~~~~*~
"Uh... Y-yeah, that's him." I answered the police officer, who'd just walked in the art class. He promptly took Anton out of the class, and now the only thing left of him was his art, and the last glare I would ever receive from him.
I held Gerard's hand all along. I was so... SCARED. I didn't want anything to happen to him, but, at the same time, I didn't want anything else to happen to ME. I don't know what I'd do if that ever happened again.
There was a moment's silence in the class...
Before someone started clapping. Applauding me.
The rest of the class followed.
I was proud again.
I was me again.
I was still dependant...
But at least, WE were strong.
~~~~~~~~~*~
Mary London here! I'm not home now, so please leave a message after the beep please!
"Hey, Mary? It's Fye. I had stress problems getting out of the Café. I wound up at the hospital for a minor concussion. I'm fine now. You know when I said I was weak? I'm not anymore. I resented myself for being dependant... But I'm stronger with Gerard. Well, anyways... Call me back when you can, okay? I think I'd like to have coffee with you... Eh, scratch that. Tea sound good?"
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