Categories > Celebrities > Fall Out Boy > I'm Mixed Up With These Drugs.
Waking up at 5pm seemed to be a new routine I had made for myself. I blinked a few times before I could focus on my surroundings. My heartbeat was racing, my head was pounding a little harder with every beat. The contents in my stomach felt as though they were slowly creeping up my throat, but I wouldn’t let it out this time. Sweat dripped from my forehead, my hands were shaking and I couldn’t seem to control them.
I clutched my head protectively in my hands. I could feel the walls vibrate with the yelling coming from the apartment next door. Everything felt surreal; every sound I heard was emphasized, everything I saw seemed to melt away in the ground.
Suddenly I could hear my eleventh grade health teacher explaining to me the effects of cocaine, in his sickly patronizing voice. Over and over I could hear his voice, it seemed to get louder with each syllable he spoke.
Then his voice just disappeared, as if it never invaded my head in the first place. Everything started fading away until all I could see was a black nothingness. I tried so hard to focus on anything, but now my head was spinning and the vomit was rising in my throat and burning as it made its way into my mouth. Still, I kept my mouth closed and my eyes open wide.
Shit, I thought, I needed to get out of this room.
I tried to get up from the floor, I tried so hard. I just couldn’t seem to make my arms move, and I couldn’t even feel my legs anymore. I tried to scream out for help but as soon as I opened my mouth the vomit I had been trying to keep in passed my lips. The burning in my throat was so intense that I started to cry.
I felt so fucking pathetic. I couldn’t do anything except cry out for my mother. I was like a little child again and I just needed a bandaid to fix this mess I was in. I need my mother to kiss everything better. I needed help.
My breathing started to get less frequent until my lungs just wouldn’t let anymore air in.
Fuck, I’m going to die here.
I tried my hardest to concentrate on my breathing and to focus my eyes on anything. But the only thing I could feel was the burning in the back of my throat and the pounding in my head.
And then I felt nothing.
I clutched my head protectively in my hands. I could feel the walls vibrate with the yelling coming from the apartment next door. Everything felt surreal; every sound I heard was emphasized, everything I saw seemed to melt away in the ground.
Suddenly I could hear my eleventh grade health teacher explaining to me the effects of cocaine, in his sickly patronizing voice. Over and over I could hear his voice, it seemed to get louder with each syllable he spoke.
Then his voice just disappeared, as if it never invaded my head in the first place. Everything started fading away until all I could see was a black nothingness. I tried so hard to focus on anything, but now my head was spinning and the vomit was rising in my throat and burning as it made its way into my mouth. Still, I kept my mouth closed and my eyes open wide.
Shit, I thought, I needed to get out of this room.
I tried to get up from the floor, I tried so hard. I just couldn’t seem to make my arms move, and I couldn’t even feel my legs anymore. I tried to scream out for help but as soon as I opened my mouth the vomit I had been trying to keep in passed my lips. The burning in my throat was so intense that I started to cry.
I felt so fucking pathetic. I couldn’t do anything except cry out for my mother. I was like a little child again and I just needed a bandaid to fix this mess I was in. I need my mother to kiss everything better. I needed help.
My breathing started to get less frequent until my lungs just wouldn’t let anymore air in.
Fuck, I’m going to die here.
I tried my hardest to concentrate on my breathing and to focus my eyes on anything. But the only thing I could feel was the burning in the back of my throat and the pounding in my head.
And then I felt nothing.
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