Categories > Books > Harry Potter > Harry Potter and the Dark Lady
Chapter 20
Sequel to Harry Potter and the Witches' Secret. Harry thought it was all over. His desire to settle in with his wives will not get fulfilled.
?Blocked
Harry Potter and the Dark Lady
Chapter 20
Potter Castle
Ducal Apartment
Dragons Den
Sunday
27 Oct 96
04:00
“Sarah, what are we doing here?” Andrew looked around the room—errh, club. “Hey, this is a strip club!”
Sarah smiled archly. “So all that Randy Andy was true, then?”
“Errrh, aaaahh...that is....”
Sarah’s laughter rang like a bell. “You’re getting more and more Harry-like—or he’s getting more and more Andrew-like, I can’t tell which.” Sarah gave a little wave and “Pour Some Sugar On Me” came up on the sound system. Sarah climbed the steps to the stage after casting a Colloportus on the door to the Dragon’s Den and dropped her dressing gown, revealing one of Parvati’s Fireball-hide creations and a pair of Fireball-hide strappy stilettos.
As she ground her hips in time to the music she resisted the urge to do a little jig. Andrew was gobsmacked. She would have to get an oath from him to protect the surprise.
In the master suite Harry awoke and smiled. He rolled over and found himself on Abreal McNeil, a fourteen-year-old Laura Prepon look-alike, who smirked and wrapped her legs around his waist. “Good morning, husband.”
Harry grinned back. “Good morning, wife.”
“Mmmmm-hmmmm....”
Harry chuckled and dove into Abreal’s mind. He used her thoughts and his abilities both physical and mental to please her very nicely. She would recover in time for the games, barely.
At about 6 a.m. Harry left the pleasantly vandalized Abreal and faded away to the bottom of the lake. He sat thinking with Bubble-Head and warming charms on. Muriel soon found him and after coaxing him into a turn she went to round up her female subjects and try to breed Harry with them all. Harry nearly drowned before he remembered his merman breathed water, not air, and canceled the Bubble-Head charm. When Muriel returned with the mermaids he threw up his hands, called on the Realm, and went with it.
At 8 a.m. he faded into his study and sat in a wingback by the fire after a tsk-ing Dobby dried and dressed him with a couple of waves of his hands.
Nym flounced in with Andrew and Sarah and rather gingerly threw herself into her favorite oversized chair. Harry moved to join her as Andrew and Sarah settled into the facing one.
“Well, how did you like Pansy’s club, Andrew?”
“Almost as much as the lovely young sexy entertainer I got to meet there, Harry.”
“Ooooh, so cheesy so early?”
Sarah favored her sister wife with a tongue and, “Hush, you. I like ’em all mushy like this.”
Harry folded Nym in his arms and pulled her into his lap, resting his chin on her head. Nym snuggled in. “What are you agonizing over today, Harry?”
“I don’t agonize, Nym!”
“Do too.”
Andrew chuckled. “While there’s perhaps a more delicate way to put it, Harry, you do agonize. Care to talk about it, or are we going to argue like four-year-olds for a while longer?”
“Feh, same old stuff, Andrew. Xi Shi, Ming Na Wen, the Russians, babies, wards, vassals, business, money, the Anak, the Patriarchs, when will the Dalai Lama show up, why do my bondsmen feel free to take liberties with my bondswomen, Lilith—and oh, by the way, 390-odd mates to be proposed to and rings made for and their handfastings planned without Garter King of Arms driving me insane, that sort of thing.” Nym nodded along with Harry’s diatribe.
Andrew smiled at them and cuddled Sarah closer. “Oh, the easy stuff.” Harry stared daggers at Andrew. “Well, let’s see. Xi Shi, hmmm; every move she makes we counter somehow. Ming Na Wen has a stone that should be fully charged by now, so the first time she’s in danger you’re going to end up with a lap full of naked fifteen-year-old Chinese Kelley Hu-looking-like witch, poor boy. Might want to practise your clothing conjuring. At some point Xi Shi will run out of minions and come herself. We know from Pope John and Cardinal Sodano that she tortured poor old Cardinal Lestrange in Paris, so she does leave China. Might want to have a rack or bed ready for that.
“The Russians, I would advise you to start putting tracts of Siberia and European Russia under the Fidelius and changing those that already exist to your control. Then you can withdraw the magical and Squib population and work on it first before you move on to re-conquering Mundane Russia.
“I think you have the baby-making thing down pretty good, and from what I’ve seen, you seem to do well with them once they get here. I personally wouldn’t have gone to the giant squid and water birthing, but the mates seem thrilled so....” Andrew shrugged.
“The Mates will all say yes, so take an hour or so a day and make some rings and then go propose to five or six a day. It will lead to—ouch, Sarah, not so hard—erm, other things which you are generally already doing anyway, so have fun. Let the mums plan the handfastings with Garter King and you all can change to how you want it at the last minute. The mums will love it—ouch, Sarah! Stop elbowing me!
“Wards seemed to have settled right in and you’re all doing fine with them—besides, what was that—errrh—oh, yes: ‘grossing them out with PDAs all the time eeeewwww’.
“Vassals are all happy and making money, which will tend to keep the greedy things happy. They have your taxes to bitch about so that’s always a plus at dinner parties. In a few years you might want to up it a percent or two to give them something new to whine about.
“Business I would leave in the stunningly beautiful Duchess Narcissa’s hands and the hands of her equally beautiful and surprisingly un-shark-like associate Duchesses. To hear the vassals and the Americans speak of them, you expect to be eaten alive if you Floo one of them. Money? The same as business—leave it to the ladies!
“The Anak are a potential problem, but as they’re fully sworn the problem is keeping them busy. Remember what I said about Siberia? That should keep them busy for a thousand years or so.
“The Patriarchs seem to be happy as long as you keep producing babies for them. I suspect they’ll try to send you a priest or two after a while. Let them. Sometimes priests can be useful.
“When the Dalai Lama does show up he’ll love you and you him and he’ll decide you are the reincarnation of Shiva or something. Just go with it. He’s a great guy, even with that little reincarnation eccentricity.
“Alcohol and testosterone are making your youngest bondsmen forget their place. Remind them with the floggings today and hang a magical portrait of yourself, whip in hand, in every magical taproom in the Realm.”
“Lilith?”
“Yes, Andrew, do go on,” a surprised-looking Nym intoned.
“Merlin’s flaming scrotum, woman! Warn somebody when you do that!”
The odd contralto issuing from Nym laughed throatily. “Oooh, I like him, Sarah, and that circle thing he does with his hips—oh my!”
Sarah blushed crimson. “Lilith! What are you doing peeking?”
“Sarah, how could I not? You are inside me, after all.”
“Squuuuuueeeeee! She’s the castle, like Rowena!”
“Hermione, please, that noise is very urrggh—”
Lilith didn’t get to finish as 653 mates dove into her mind.
Harry looked at Andrew, who shrugged.
“Sisters, please, not so rough!”
The mates settled and were more delicate but didn’t stop plundering Lilith’s mind.
Andrew smirked at Harry. “What is it with you and the split personality women, Harry?”
Lilith answered using Nym. “Don’t be fresh, Andrew.”
“Lilith, is Nym okay?”
“Of course, Harry.”
“Why do you keep using Nym, Lilith?”
“You made love with her in my Heart chamber and tied me to her. Plus she’s tied to me through the wards on the Castle. Something has recently started pouring magic into me and, well, I’m more and more awake. It has been eons of turnings of the stars since I was this awake. Soon I will share like Rowena and Roxanne do with Hermione and Susan.”
“With who, baby?”
Andrew watched, amazed, as Harry folded what they suspected was an elder goddess in his arms and kissed her temple. Lilith/Nym smiled a secret little smile Andrew had seen on a few women’s faces before, women who had made conquests. He laughed. Poor Harry.
“Andrew, hush. One of the Han girls, Harry. I can’t tell which one yet, though.”
Andrew watched Harry be lost for a few minutes. “Chinese, Harry. They were called Han, oh, maybe 200 B.C.”
Lilith/Nym snuggled into Harry. “Mmm-hhmmm, just a little while ago.” She appeared to be sleeping.
Sarah came back from the bond and confirmed it. “She—errrh, they—are napping, Andrew. Apparently it’s very tiring for them as they’re not a match.”
Harry smiled and held Nym/Lilith. He could tell Lilith was there now and that she and Nym had switched—control? Dominance, maybe? Whatever it was, Nym was back in charge of the body.
Sarah looked at her mates after about twenty minute’s conversation with Andrew. “Games in five minutes, Harry.”
Nym stretched in Harry’s lap. “Okay, let’s go to the box.”
Harry smiled and faded them away.
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Royal Academy
Sports Ground
27 Oct 96
08:00
“Good Morning, gentle beings, and welcome to the pre-event show on WWN Sports, your home for all the Sport and Court news I’m Percival Gribbs. We’re here live at the Royal Academy on a very blustery typical Highland winter day. Today’s Court schedule for the first time includes two members of the Regiment charged with conduct unbecoming. Also twelve of our fellow subjects from the east are up on a variety of charges and it looks like at least one execution.
“As for today’s sport the top story will be the Duke again flying Seeker for the Harpies vs. the Uni Slytherin. Sure to be a good match that, with the Uni Slytherin lying in second place behind the Uni Gryffindors in the Uni League and in ninth place overall, still in striking distance of a Premier playoff berth.
“Another event has been added to the sport. The Duke has added butts and a firearm marksmanship—erm, tournament—I believe, yes, tournament has been added. We understand the competitors are mostly magic limited members of the Regiment but apparently competition is open to any who can demonstrate the appropriate knowledge and skills.
“And now a word from our sponsor.”
Percival leaned back while the commercial for Eyelop’s Owl Emporium ran and looked at Bruce arguing with Glenda. He shook his head; it looked as if she would win today. Of course her being nearly naked in that—erm, diaphanous, yes that’s what we’ll call it—dress under the opened robe and having those nipples that would cut glass had to be given credit. After all, Bruce was a pouf, not blind, and Glenda was a fine figure of a woman. Now if she would just shut up once in a while.
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Royal Academy
Sports Ground
Promenade
27 Oct 96
08:10
“I wouldn’t do that!” George ducked as the fifth form pulled the string on the cracker he’d just paid for. Cornish Pixies flew everywhere as squeals abounded. Soon enough the Pixies disappeared.
“Good we built that timed Vanisher in, George.”
George nodded. “You know, that was actually Neville’s idea and Romilda’s timer spell.”
Fred grimaced as the boys’ third to sixth forms emptied the cracker barrel and headed for Romilda and Lavender at the counter. “Royalties, then? Knut a hundred?”
George nodded.
Outside on the Promenade Agnes was window shopping and watching her brothers and sisters. “Deborah, let’s go by Glad Rags.”
Deborah Valentine, Warg sixth form, looked at her. “Afraid to try the box, Agnes?”
“A little, Deborah, but not much. Da will be marrying the new mums—we’ll need dresses. Ball season is coming, too.”
“I’m not buying, Agnes. Parvati is helping me make mine.”
“All of us, Deborah, but I want to look at the styles.”
“Agnes, you know Da won’t let you wear some of those.”
Agnes rolled her eyes. “I know. Not those, anyway. I’m no slag.”
SSG Charles Lombard watched his platoon watching the wards. He would have no nonsense on his watch. Those two privates Santos and Nelson were a bad enough black eye on the Regiment.
Cindy Wallace watched SSG Lombard watching the wards. She had been there when he was bound. Good man that, damn near died trying to do the right thing for his bonded. Cindy eyed Bill Hendricks; good man that, too. Why was he so thick? Maybe she should talk to Duchess Nym. Either that or just take what she wanted in the shower after shift. Hmmm. What the hades?
A shadow had fallen across the Promenade and Cindy looked up to see a cloud of—vampires? In hooded robes? What the hell?
Suddenly the Promenade was full of vampire Duchesses and the vampire goddess Amelia Fastida.
Cindy listened as Amelia Fastida apparently talked to the Duke in their bond. “Harry, stay there with Nym. I have this. They’re Chinese vampires in her service. Apparently wizards. Do you want them destroyed or enslaved, my Master?”
Cindy blinked. Amelia continued, “Thank you, Master.”
Amelia waited calmly—maybe glacially was a better word; you could feel the cold flowing from her—till the vampires had all landed.
Xhang Li Meng focused on this female as he landed and he sighed as he realized who it was. So a thousand years and it ends here. Li Meng wasn’t sure if he was glad or not.
Amelia watched the realization set in. “You are the leader?”
Li Meng bowed. “Mistress, I am the senior here, your slave Xhang Li Meng.”
Amelia’s laughter was disconcerting. “My Master’s slave, you mean. You may stay in existence as long as you swear fealty and accept his mastery.”
“As you will, Mistress. Is there perhaps a dark place for us? One thin cloud and we’ll be immolated even through these charmed robes. We would not wish to inconvenience the Master by his having to have our useless ashes swept away.”
Amelia rolled her eyes as Zsuzsa snorted. “Mother, you always attract these overly obsequious ones.”
“Hush, Zsuzsa. Gianna, please show Li Meng and Harry’s new vampires to the deep holds.”
Gianna Michaels, one of the youngest vampire mates, stepped forward and led Li Meng away.
“Gianna, don’t kill them all if they get stroppy. Harry will want to eat ten or twelve.”
Gianna threw a bright smile back over her shoulder.
“Really, Mother, always with the drama. Just destroy a few and have done.”
“That’s your problem, Zsuzsa, always so practical. Live a little—have some fun. I knew I should have sent you to Beauxbatons instead of Durmstrang.”
Cindy shook her head as the vampires and their Princess faded away.
“Well, that’s that then. Ice cream?”
Cindy turned to Bill and then caught her sharp reply. “You buying, then?”
“Erm—well yes, Cindy.”
Cindy’s heart fluttered; he had never called her by her given name before.
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Royal Academy
Sports Ground
27 Oct 96
08:57
Harry and Nym faded into the box followed by the mates and Andrew. Rose and Tulip appeared with the babies and the day got underway.
“Harry, are you going to do a pre-game practise today?”
“No, Andrew. Gwendolyn doesn’t want to run the risk of having the Slytherins watching. We’ll do a warm-up at 15:00 and then wait for the game.”
Andrew nodded and as the Ducal box filled they watched the games and events get underway.
Ginny looked at the foot of the box. “Nym....”
“I see her, Ginny. Harry, you’re going to have to bond Scarlet Loken.”
Harry waved and Scarlet appeared in his lap. “Eeeep. Harry!”
“What? No, Your Grace! Scarlet?” Harry spun her to face the pitch and pulled her back against himself. Scarlet moaned.
Pansy looked at Harry critically. “Nym, we may have to close the Den if it’s going to make him all bold.”
“It’s a mood, Pansy. It will soon pass and we’ll have our shy little flower back.”
“Hey, I’m right here!”
The mates laughed at Harry while the wards who had arrived in the box rolled their eyes, much to the crowd’s amusement. No matter what went on at the sports ground a significant portion of the entertainment always came from section one.
Xiomara and Julia Hooch moved into the seats behind Harry and sat watching and grinning as he played hard with the mates and Scarlet.
“Scarlet, how are you, dear?”
“Oh, Your Majesty!” Scarlet tried to rise from Harry’s lap and curtsy. Harry winced and Phillip laughed.
“Careful, Scarlet, or you’ll have to wait longer.”
“Phillip!”
“What?”
Elizabeth covered her face with one hand for a moment. “Amelia Fastida, I’m told that 112 vampires came to the events today.”
Amelia grinned. “Yes, Mum, but they had a different sport in mind. Harry will play with them this evening.”
Elizabeth sighed. “So everyone is feeling stroppy then. Stop pouting, Amelia. What are you going to do with the vampires, Harry? Harry!”
Harry had become fascinated with the long graceful neck eight inches in front of him. “Errrh, who, Mum?”
Elizabeth huffed and answered, “The vampires from China, Harry,” as the mates snickered.
“Oh, you know, beat up a few, eat one or two, dominate the rest, Mum.”
“Harry! Nymphadora—deal with your husband, please.”
“Me! What? Why me?”
The mates broke up as Elizabeth scowled at them all. “Phillip, this is your fault.”
“Beg pardon?”
“Grrrrr.”
Philip leaned away from Elizabeth as he escorted her to a seat. “It’s all right, dear. I’m sure a nice cup of tea will make it all better.” Winky appeared with a cup and passed it to the Queen.
Nym thought a moment and Geoffrey appeared with an army of elves and began serving tea and a light breakfast of fruits and pastries. Harry ate from a basket in Scarlet’s lap. Ooohs and ahhhs filled the sports ground.
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Royal Academy
Sports Ground
27 Oct 96
09:15
“And we’re back! Percival Gribbs—”
“—and Glenda Chittock—”
“—bringing you all the Sport and Court for WWN Sport.”
Glenda smiled at Percival and leaned in. Percy looked down and she took advantage. “While we were on break the Duke and Duchesses have greeted the Queen on her arrival and have settled back into what appears to be a nice light breakfast. The young lady snatched from the concourse in front of the Ducal box has been identified as Scarlet Loken, a Warg Masters candidate and potential bonded. Looks like it won’t be potential for long as she’s still occupying the Realm’s favorite lap.
“Also we have been handed a note: Potter’s Field, the fantastic new public house here at the Royal Academy, is seeking qualified persons for all positions. Interested beings should see Lieutenant Colonel Sally Ann Cromwell of the Service Battalion, the Duke of Magic’s own Regiment of Infantry, at the Potter’s Field. Ooooh, a golden opportunity this, ladies. I wouldn’t miss it—and the uniforms of the Service Battalion are stunning.”
Percy rolled his eyes and took back control when she took a breath. “And now back to the Quidditch, Royal Wargs still leading Hogwarts Puffs 110 to 100….”
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Royal Academy
Sports Ground
27 Oct 96
13:00
Harry had managed to watch a couple of games of Quidditch and was happy. The kids took advantage and dragged him away to the Promenade, the older girls all with babies on hips. Elena Skinner Potter, former Death Eater daughter, now thirteen-year-old Hogwarts Warg third form, was charged with the care and feeding of Harry by Nym before they left. She nodded seriously and dragged him away by the hand. The Potter brood slew the Promenade dead. Glenda, seeing them leave, took a remote microphone and one of the new Extendable Ear things and gave a running commentary.
Bruce Titterhorn was lost in thought. Glenda was performing a valuable service. The female, and some of the male listeners too, hung on her every word about the absolutely yummy Duke Potter and his Most Ancient and Most Noble House. It was a little much when combined with the Quidditch, though. What they needed was a simulcast on a separate channel. Hmmm, channel 3 had that bizarre old purple pervert Derwent Shimpling telling bawdy jokes all day—the same old bawdy jokes, mostly. He could be cut down to after Court and that would free up the channel for the—erm—Duke’s View? View of the Duke? Notes from the Realm? Dissecting the Duchy? Hmmm, that had promise. Work on the tagline and title later; shoot Duchess Rita a messenger now.
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Royal Academy
Sports Ground
27 Oct 96
13:00
Augusta Longbottom sat with Frank, Alice, Neville, and Romilda in the Wizengamot box of the section four wedge of seats. Griselda Marchbanks sat next to her.
“Augusta, have you read Bellatrix’s letter?”
“Yes, Griselda.”
“And?”
“I didn’t like the idea at first, but I believe on further reflection it’s the way to go, Griselda.”
“I thought the same thing, Augusta. After all, Harry would maintain absolute veto power and as we’re all sworn we can’t really go against him anyway without being declared forfeit when Elizabeth or the Realm should find out. I do think we need a citizen’s oath that includes the same type of affect.”
“Have you talked to the other members, Griselda?”
“Yes, actually, Augusta. They’re of the same mind. We’ll ask Duchess Bellatrix to get us the proper assistance from Mr. Major and Mr. Blair and announce the rules and procedures after we, errrh, determine the constituency.”
Augusta laughed. “I know, I think we need some classes first. Bellatrix covered all of that first past the post, single-member district plurality twaddle with way too much verve and élan. I think her inner Slytherin is having a continuous orgasm over this.”
“Augusta!”
“Mother!”
“Gram!”
“Hehehe.”
Augusta looked around. “No one else? Fine, then. Bah! All of you, grow up. And I heard that giggle, Romilda. I believe it’s time to discuss a handfasting for two young people I know. Frank, go find William Vane. Alice, go with him; this is too important to be left to men. Once they nod and shake hands, you and Camille work out the details.”
Augusta looked around at the slack faces and sighed. “What, did you have a relapse and take Nev and Romy with you? Go on, all of you, scoot!” She waved her hands at them as if they were wayward ducks.
Griselda covered her mouth with a gloved hand as Augusta chivvied her brood into motion. After they had shuffled off and Augusta sat smiling, she looked at her friend. “Happy then, Augusta?”
“Ecstatic. I owe that boy more than could ever be repaid. Why, what he did for Frank and Alice alone….”
Griselda nodded. Augusta wasn’t the only one who owed. “We should do something for him.”
“Let’s give him something he can use and get control of the Realm, Griselda. Let’s give him a life instead of a war.”
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Royal Academy
Sports Ground
27 Oct 96
20:00
“And here we are, gentle beings. Sport has wrapped up for the day with that dramatic 300–150 win by the Harpies over Slytherin and we’ll bring you the roundup after Court. Duchess Hestia has opened Court and the Aurors have brought the twelve offending subjects forward for judgment.”
“Yes they have, Percy. The Wizengamot’s board is all green lights and here we go in a twelve-on-one class four duel. The Duke seems to be playing with these as he stands leaning on his staff. Oh, there’s an AK from that Russian gangster and the Duke responds in his customary manner. Some more ashes for the pitch there. The rest are winding down now, and there’s the marking. Geoffrey leads the new bound men away and Duchess Nymphadora is approaching with the two members of the Regiment up on charges.”
“Oh, and I’d rather face the lash than that disappointed look from the Duke, Percy, Daniel.”
Daniel Boxlighter and Percival Gribbs looked at Glenda and let her continue. “You can actually feel his disappointment all the way up here, gentle beings. What must it be like to be the object of that and stand fifteen feet from him?
“Duchess Hestia has conjured two stout posts and the prisoners have been stripped of their blouses, turned about, shackled to the post, and offered the stick. Smart men, those—they’ve taken the offer.
“Duchess Sarah is assembling the Regiment on the pitch to observe punishment. Duchess Susan is reading the Charges and Specifications. And our Duke pronounces punishment for conduct unbecoming a member of the Regiment: ten lashes.
“In an obvious agony of conscience, our Duke has conjured a bullwhip of about ten feet in the thong and maybe twenty-four inches in the fall.”
Daniel looked at Percy and mouthed, “How the Hades does she know that?” Percy had no idea because he didn’t know what she was talking about. To him a whip was a whip.
“Our Duke has steeled himself now and stepped forward. It looks like Private Nelson is first, and the Duke lays on with a will. Nelson’s Company Commander Duchess Padma Patil Potter counting off the strokes and two, three, four—Nelson being a real man, here at least—five, six—oh, finally the first outcry—seven—oh, that one drew blood—eight, nine, ten. Finally that’s over, to the Duke’s obvious relief as well as everyone else’s. The medics rush forward to see to Nelson and our poor Duke turns to Santos.
“His Company Commander Duchess Megan Jones Potter steps forward bravely and one, two, three—oh my, a outcry from Santos—four, five—that one’s drawn blood—six, seven, eight, nine, ten—and it’s all over, thank Morgana.
“Our Duke stands head down on the pitch with the coiled whip and I believe I just saw a tear fall. It’s so hard to tell through my own.”
Perci was amazed; Glenda sat there as dry-eyed as if she were a mummy, using that now quavering voice from her smiling lips.
“And that nasty little Imelda Talley, Teen Witch Weekly reporter—more like vulture—has snapped a photo, rudely intruding on the Duke’s solitude. Oh I say, good show, our Duchess Nymphadora has the little imp firmly in hand. Our Duke has thrown the whip on the pitch and incinerated it. One wonders if the Realm will allow the grass to return to the site of the Duke’s pain or if it will be forever barren.”
Percy and Daniel wanted to cheer the spectacular performance by Glenda. They gave air claps which she acknowledged with a regal nod as she let the dead air stretch for perhaps fifteen seconds, an eternity in radio. Bruce was absolutely losing his mind. It appeared he might fall on his knees and worship at Glenda’s feet.
Percy leaned forward and switched on his microphone. “And after that painful moment of Regimental history one never wishes to see repeated, here is the Sunday sports roundup….”
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Potter Castle
Deep Holds
27 Oct 96
20:26
Harry and the subdued bonded plus Andrew and Imelda faded into the deep holds. The wards were moving their infant and younger siblings back to the Castle as planned. Harry stood apart for a moment. That really had been a tear.
“All right there, then, Harry?”
“Fine, Andrew, just need a minute. That was the most painful thing I’ve ever done.”
Nym nodded. “Surprisingly, yes. It really hurt to have to do that. Imelda, you’d better have gotten a good picture. I never want to go through that again.”
A very sober Imelda nodded and started carefully developing the single frame she had taken from her knees on the pitch looking up into Harry’s agonized face, his tear-tracked eyes focused on the bloody whip in his right hand, his lip curled in disgust. That it was at himself didn’t need to be bruited about. It was a shockingly powerful image. Jacquelyn Parkinson Potter would turn this image combined with her, her mates’, and Harry’s feelings into a nearly sentient series of wizarding portraits of Harry, one for each of the main magical pubs in every public magical area of the Realm, and the most powerful of them for the lobby of the Ministry of Magic. The trademark of all the paintings would be the identical coiled bloody whips in all of them. Regimental soldiers were known to become rapidly sober on finding the burning green glare of one of the portraits focused on them. The photograph would be blown up and be posted in every public house by writ and many homes by choice.
Xhang Li Meng approached Harry and knelt gracefully. “Master, we await your judgment.”
Harry turned to him. “We don’t have to fight, do we?”
“At least a little, Master; it is customary.”
“Well, get up then.”
Harry walked to the center of the hall and turned around. “Well, let’s go—all of you at once. I have better things to do.”
The Chinese vampires looked at each other and then attacked. Amidst the shrieks Nym turned to Imelda. “Time for you to go, Imelda.”
“Nym! Let me stay, please? I won’t write anything about it or take pictures. I won’t tell anyone either without your and Harry’s permission, you have my oath.”
A pale nimbus surrounded her, to everyone’s surprise, and Nym sighed. “All right, but if he gets confused and mates you, don’t say I didn’t warn you.”
Imelda nodded. “I’ll be careful, Nym,” and she scampered to the edge of the fight.
“Nym, you do know they’re all male vampires, right?”
“Of course, Amelia, but why spoil it for her?” Amelia Fastida looked at Nym and burst out laughing.
Andrew watched the fight nervously. “Errrh, shouldn’t we help Harry?”
“More like we should help those poor vampires, Andrew. Harry is kicking the crap out of them.”
“Zsuzsa! Language!”
“Channeling Mi, mother? I thought she had to be dead and you alive, not vice versa.”
Nym had to sit down. Amelia Fastida, vampire goddess, made an extremely odd looking fish out of water. Soon all the mates had joined their primary Alpha in her laughter. Harry walked up. “What did I miss?”
“Your mates’ latest comedy routine, Harry. Through beating up vampires, then
Harry shrugged at Andrew. “They all got tired, I guess.”
Andrew turned and looked out over the hold. The vampires were all unconscious and Mopsy and Flopsy were moving between them with baskets of blood boluses. He shook his head. “Come on, comedian, let’s go play with the babies.”
Harry nodded and they all faded to the Ducal apartment.
Imelda squeed delightedly and charged into the bedroom. No reporter had ever even been inside Potter Castle and here she was in the holy of holies.
Rita rolled her eyes. “Harry!”
“Sorry, Rita, I forgot.”
Rita shook her head and started for the bedroom, holding a hand in front of her eyes. Imelda was taking pictures and popping flashbulbs like machine gun fire.
Chapter 20
Potter Castle
Ducal Apartment
Dragons Den
Sunday
27 Oct 96
04:00
“Sarah, what are we doing here?” Andrew looked around the room—errh, club. “Hey, this is a strip club!”
Sarah smiled archly. “So all that Randy Andy was true, then?”
“Errrh, aaaahh...that is....”
Sarah’s laughter rang like a bell. “You’re getting more and more Harry-like—or he’s getting more and more Andrew-like, I can’t tell which.” Sarah gave a little wave and “Pour Some Sugar On Me” came up on the sound system. Sarah climbed the steps to the stage after casting a Colloportus on the door to the Dragon’s Den and dropped her dressing gown, revealing one of Parvati’s Fireball-hide creations and a pair of Fireball-hide strappy stilettos.
As she ground her hips in time to the music she resisted the urge to do a little jig. Andrew was gobsmacked. She would have to get an oath from him to protect the surprise.
In the master suite Harry awoke and smiled. He rolled over and found himself on Abreal McNeil, a fourteen-year-old Laura Prepon look-alike, who smirked and wrapped her legs around his waist. “Good morning, husband.”
Harry grinned back. “Good morning, wife.”
“Mmmmm-hmmmm....”
Harry chuckled and dove into Abreal’s mind. He used her thoughts and his abilities both physical and mental to please her very nicely. She would recover in time for the games, barely.
At about 6 a.m. Harry left the pleasantly vandalized Abreal and faded away to the bottom of the lake. He sat thinking with Bubble-Head and warming charms on. Muriel soon found him and after coaxing him into a turn she went to round up her female subjects and try to breed Harry with them all. Harry nearly drowned before he remembered his merman breathed water, not air, and canceled the Bubble-Head charm. When Muriel returned with the mermaids he threw up his hands, called on the Realm, and went with it.
At 8 a.m. he faded into his study and sat in a wingback by the fire after a tsk-ing Dobby dried and dressed him with a couple of waves of his hands.
Nym flounced in with Andrew and Sarah and rather gingerly threw herself into her favorite oversized chair. Harry moved to join her as Andrew and Sarah settled into the facing one.
“Well, how did you like Pansy’s club, Andrew?”
“Almost as much as the lovely young sexy entertainer I got to meet there, Harry.”
“Ooooh, so cheesy so early?”
Sarah favored her sister wife with a tongue and, “Hush, you. I like ’em all mushy like this.”
Harry folded Nym in his arms and pulled her into his lap, resting his chin on her head. Nym snuggled in. “What are you agonizing over today, Harry?”
“I don’t agonize, Nym!”
“Do too.”
Andrew chuckled. “While there’s perhaps a more delicate way to put it, Harry, you do agonize. Care to talk about it, or are we going to argue like four-year-olds for a while longer?”
“Feh, same old stuff, Andrew. Xi Shi, Ming Na Wen, the Russians, babies, wards, vassals, business, money, the Anak, the Patriarchs, when will the Dalai Lama show up, why do my bondsmen feel free to take liberties with my bondswomen, Lilith—and oh, by the way, 390-odd mates to be proposed to and rings made for and their handfastings planned without Garter King of Arms driving me insane, that sort of thing.” Nym nodded along with Harry’s diatribe.
Andrew smiled at them and cuddled Sarah closer. “Oh, the easy stuff.” Harry stared daggers at Andrew. “Well, let’s see. Xi Shi, hmmm; every move she makes we counter somehow. Ming Na Wen has a stone that should be fully charged by now, so the first time she’s in danger you’re going to end up with a lap full of naked fifteen-year-old Chinese Kelley Hu-looking-like witch, poor boy. Might want to practise your clothing conjuring. At some point Xi Shi will run out of minions and come herself. We know from Pope John and Cardinal Sodano that she tortured poor old Cardinal Lestrange in Paris, so she does leave China. Might want to have a rack or bed ready for that.
“The Russians, I would advise you to start putting tracts of Siberia and European Russia under the Fidelius and changing those that already exist to your control. Then you can withdraw the magical and Squib population and work on it first before you move on to re-conquering Mundane Russia.
“I think you have the baby-making thing down pretty good, and from what I’ve seen, you seem to do well with them once they get here. I personally wouldn’t have gone to the giant squid and water birthing, but the mates seem thrilled so....” Andrew shrugged.
“The Mates will all say yes, so take an hour or so a day and make some rings and then go propose to five or six a day. It will lead to—ouch, Sarah, not so hard—erm, other things which you are generally already doing anyway, so have fun. Let the mums plan the handfastings with Garter King and you all can change to how you want it at the last minute. The mums will love it—ouch, Sarah! Stop elbowing me!
“Wards seemed to have settled right in and you’re all doing fine with them—besides, what was that—errrh—oh, yes: ‘grossing them out with PDAs all the time eeeewwww’.
“Vassals are all happy and making money, which will tend to keep the greedy things happy. They have your taxes to bitch about so that’s always a plus at dinner parties. In a few years you might want to up it a percent or two to give them something new to whine about.
“Business I would leave in the stunningly beautiful Duchess Narcissa’s hands and the hands of her equally beautiful and surprisingly un-shark-like associate Duchesses. To hear the vassals and the Americans speak of them, you expect to be eaten alive if you Floo one of them. Money? The same as business—leave it to the ladies!
“The Anak are a potential problem, but as they’re fully sworn the problem is keeping them busy. Remember what I said about Siberia? That should keep them busy for a thousand years or so.
“The Patriarchs seem to be happy as long as you keep producing babies for them. I suspect they’ll try to send you a priest or two after a while. Let them. Sometimes priests can be useful.
“When the Dalai Lama does show up he’ll love you and you him and he’ll decide you are the reincarnation of Shiva or something. Just go with it. He’s a great guy, even with that little reincarnation eccentricity.
“Alcohol and testosterone are making your youngest bondsmen forget their place. Remind them with the floggings today and hang a magical portrait of yourself, whip in hand, in every magical taproom in the Realm.”
“Lilith?”
“Yes, Andrew, do go on,” a surprised-looking Nym intoned.
“Merlin’s flaming scrotum, woman! Warn somebody when you do that!”
The odd contralto issuing from Nym laughed throatily. “Oooh, I like him, Sarah, and that circle thing he does with his hips—oh my!”
Sarah blushed crimson. “Lilith! What are you doing peeking?”
“Sarah, how could I not? You are inside me, after all.”
“Squuuuuueeeeee! She’s the castle, like Rowena!”
“Hermione, please, that noise is very urrggh—”
Lilith didn’t get to finish as 653 mates dove into her mind.
Harry looked at Andrew, who shrugged.
“Sisters, please, not so rough!”
The mates settled and were more delicate but didn’t stop plundering Lilith’s mind.
Andrew smirked at Harry. “What is it with you and the split personality women, Harry?”
Lilith answered using Nym. “Don’t be fresh, Andrew.”
“Lilith, is Nym okay?”
“Of course, Harry.”
“Why do you keep using Nym, Lilith?”
“You made love with her in my Heart chamber and tied me to her. Plus she’s tied to me through the wards on the Castle. Something has recently started pouring magic into me and, well, I’m more and more awake. It has been eons of turnings of the stars since I was this awake. Soon I will share like Rowena and Roxanne do with Hermione and Susan.”
“With who, baby?”
Andrew watched, amazed, as Harry folded what they suspected was an elder goddess in his arms and kissed her temple. Lilith/Nym smiled a secret little smile Andrew had seen on a few women’s faces before, women who had made conquests. He laughed. Poor Harry.
“Andrew, hush. One of the Han girls, Harry. I can’t tell which one yet, though.”
Andrew watched Harry be lost for a few minutes. “Chinese, Harry. They were called Han, oh, maybe 200 B.C.”
Lilith/Nym snuggled into Harry. “Mmm-hhmmm, just a little while ago.” She appeared to be sleeping.
Sarah came back from the bond and confirmed it. “She—errrh, they—are napping, Andrew. Apparently it’s very tiring for them as they’re not a match.”
Harry smiled and held Nym/Lilith. He could tell Lilith was there now and that she and Nym had switched—control? Dominance, maybe? Whatever it was, Nym was back in charge of the body.
Sarah looked at her mates after about twenty minute’s conversation with Andrew. “Games in five minutes, Harry.”
Nym stretched in Harry’s lap. “Okay, let’s go to the box.”
Harry smiled and faded them away.
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Royal Academy
Sports Ground
27 Oct 96
08:00
“Good Morning, gentle beings, and welcome to the pre-event show on WWN Sports, your home for all the Sport and Court news I’m Percival Gribbs. We’re here live at the Royal Academy on a very blustery typical Highland winter day. Today’s Court schedule for the first time includes two members of the Regiment charged with conduct unbecoming. Also twelve of our fellow subjects from the east are up on a variety of charges and it looks like at least one execution.
“As for today’s sport the top story will be the Duke again flying Seeker for the Harpies vs. the Uni Slytherin. Sure to be a good match that, with the Uni Slytherin lying in second place behind the Uni Gryffindors in the Uni League and in ninth place overall, still in striking distance of a Premier playoff berth.
“Another event has been added to the sport. The Duke has added butts and a firearm marksmanship—erm, tournament—I believe, yes, tournament has been added. We understand the competitors are mostly magic limited members of the Regiment but apparently competition is open to any who can demonstrate the appropriate knowledge and skills.
“And now a word from our sponsor.”
Percival leaned back while the commercial for Eyelop’s Owl Emporium ran and looked at Bruce arguing with Glenda. He shook his head; it looked as if she would win today. Of course her being nearly naked in that—erm, diaphanous, yes that’s what we’ll call it—dress under the opened robe and having those nipples that would cut glass had to be given credit. After all, Bruce was a pouf, not blind, and Glenda was a fine figure of a woman. Now if she would just shut up once in a while.
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Royal Academy
Sports Ground
Promenade
27 Oct 96
08:10
“I wouldn’t do that!” George ducked as the fifth form pulled the string on the cracker he’d just paid for. Cornish Pixies flew everywhere as squeals abounded. Soon enough the Pixies disappeared.
“Good we built that timed Vanisher in, George.”
George nodded. “You know, that was actually Neville’s idea and Romilda’s timer spell.”
Fred grimaced as the boys’ third to sixth forms emptied the cracker barrel and headed for Romilda and Lavender at the counter. “Royalties, then? Knut a hundred?”
George nodded.
Outside on the Promenade Agnes was window shopping and watching her brothers and sisters. “Deborah, let’s go by Glad Rags.”
Deborah Valentine, Warg sixth form, looked at her. “Afraid to try the box, Agnes?”
“A little, Deborah, but not much. Da will be marrying the new mums—we’ll need dresses. Ball season is coming, too.”
“I’m not buying, Agnes. Parvati is helping me make mine.”
“All of us, Deborah, but I want to look at the styles.”
“Agnes, you know Da won’t let you wear some of those.”
Agnes rolled her eyes. “I know. Not those, anyway. I’m no slag.”
SSG Charles Lombard watched his platoon watching the wards. He would have no nonsense on his watch. Those two privates Santos and Nelson were a bad enough black eye on the Regiment.
Cindy Wallace watched SSG Lombard watching the wards. She had been there when he was bound. Good man that, damn near died trying to do the right thing for his bonded. Cindy eyed Bill Hendricks; good man that, too. Why was he so thick? Maybe she should talk to Duchess Nym. Either that or just take what she wanted in the shower after shift. Hmmm. What the hades?
A shadow had fallen across the Promenade and Cindy looked up to see a cloud of—vampires? In hooded robes? What the hell?
Suddenly the Promenade was full of vampire Duchesses and the vampire goddess Amelia Fastida.
Cindy listened as Amelia Fastida apparently talked to the Duke in their bond. “Harry, stay there with Nym. I have this. They’re Chinese vampires in her service. Apparently wizards. Do you want them destroyed or enslaved, my Master?”
Cindy blinked. Amelia continued, “Thank you, Master.”
Amelia waited calmly—maybe glacially was a better word; you could feel the cold flowing from her—till the vampires had all landed.
Xhang Li Meng focused on this female as he landed and he sighed as he realized who it was. So a thousand years and it ends here. Li Meng wasn’t sure if he was glad or not.
Amelia watched the realization set in. “You are the leader?”
Li Meng bowed. “Mistress, I am the senior here, your slave Xhang Li Meng.”
Amelia’s laughter was disconcerting. “My Master’s slave, you mean. You may stay in existence as long as you swear fealty and accept his mastery.”
“As you will, Mistress. Is there perhaps a dark place for us? One thin cloud and we’ll be immolated even through these charmed robes. We would not wish to inconvenience the Master by his having to have our useless ashes swept away.”
Amelia rolled her eyes as Zsuzsa snorted. “Mother, you always attract these overly obsequious ones.”
“Hush, Zsuzsa. Gianna, please show Li Meng and Harry’s new vampires to the deep holds.”
Gianna Michaels, one of the youngest vampire mates, stepped forward and led Li Meng away.
“Gianna, don’t kill them all if they get stroppy. Harry will want to eat ten or twelve.”
Gianna threw a bright smile back over her shoulder.
“Really, Mother, always with the drama. Just destroy a few and have done.”
“That’s your problem, Zsuzsa, always so practical. Live a little—have some fun. I knew I should have sent you to Beauxbatons instead of Durmstrang.”
Cindy shook her head as the vampires and their Princess faded away.
“Well, that’s that then. Ice cream?”
Cindy turned to Bill and then caught her sharp reply. “You buying, then?”
“Erm—well yes, Cindy.”
Cindy’s heart fluttered; he had never called her by her given name before.
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Royal Academy
Sports Ground
27 Oct 96
08:57
Harry and Nym faded into the box followed by the mates and Andrew. Rose and Tulip appeared with the babies and the day got underway.
“Harry, are you going to do a pre-game practise today?”
“No, Andrew. Gwendolyn doesn’t want to run the risk of having the Slytherins watching. We’ll do a warm-up at 15:00 and then wait for the game.”
Andrew nodded and as the Ducal box filled they watched the games and events get underway.
Ginny looked at the foot of the box. “Nym....”
“I see her, Ginny. Harry, you’re going to have to bond Scarlet Loken.”
Harry waved and Scarlet appeared in his lap. “Eeeep. Harry!”
“What? No, Your Grace! Scarlet?” Harry spun her to face the pitch and pulled her back against himself. Scarlet moaned.
Pansy looked at Harry critically. “Nym, we may have to close the Den if it’s going to make him all bold.”
“It’s a mood, Pansy. It will soon pass and we’ll have our shy little flower back.”
“Hey, I’m right here!”
The mates laughed at Harry while the wards who had arrived in the box rolled their eyes, much to the crowd’s amusement. No matter what went on at the sports ground a significant portion of the entertainment always came from section one.
Xiomara and Julia Hooch moved into the seats behind Harry and sat watching and grinning as he played hard with the mates and Scarlet.
“Scarlet, how are you, dear?”
“Oh, Your Majesty!” Scarlet tried to rise from Harry’s lap and curtsy. Harry winced and Phillip laughed.
“Careful, Scarlet, or you’ll have to wait longer.”
“Phillip!”
“What?”
Elizabeth covered her face with one hand for a moment. “Amelia Fastida, I’m told that 112 vampires came to the events today.”
Amelia grinned. “Yes, Mum, but they had a different sport in mind. Harry will play with them this evening.”
Elizabeth sighed. “So everyone is feeling stroppy then. Stop pouting, Amelia. What are you going to do with the vampires, Harry? Harry!”
Harry had become fascinated with the long graceful neck eight inches in front of him. “Errrh, who, Mum?”
Elizabeth huffed and answered, “The vampires from China, Harry,” as the mates snickered.
“Oh, you know, beat up a few, eat one or two, dominate the rest, Mum.”
“Harry! Nymphadora—deal with your husband, please.”
“Me! What? Why me?”
The mates broke up as Elizabeth scowled at them all. “Phillip, this is your fault.”
“Beg pardon?”
“Grrrrr.”
Philip leaned away from Elizabeth as he escorted her to a seat. “It’s all right, dear. I’m sure a nice cup of tea will make it all better.” Winky appeared with a cup and passed it to the Queen.
Nym thought a moment and Geoffrey appeared with an army of elves and began serving tea and a light breakfast of fruits and pastries. Harry ate from a basket in Scarlet’s lap. Ooohs and ahhhs filled the sports ground.
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Royal Academy
Sports Ground
27 Oct 96
09:15
“And we’re back! Percival Gribbs—”
“—and Glenda Chittock—”
“—bringing you all the Sport and Court for WWN Sport.”
Glenda smiled at Percival and leaned in. Percy looked down and she took advantage. “While we were on break the Duke and Duchesses have greeted the Queen on her arrival and have settled back into what appears to be a nice light breakfast. The young lady snatched from the concourse in front of the Ducal box has been identified as Scarlet Loken, a Warg Masters candidate and potential bonded. Looks like it won’t be potential for long as she’s still occupying the Realm’s favorite lap.
“Also we have been handed a note: Potter’s Field, the fantastic new public house here at the Royal Academy, is seeking qualified persons for all positions. Interested beings should see Lieutenant Colonel Sally Ann Cromwell of the Service Battalion, the Duke of Magic’s own Regiment of Infantry, at the Potter’s Field. Ooooh, a golden opportunity this, ladies. I wouldn’t miss it—and the uniforms of the Service Battalion are stunning.”
Percy rolled his eyes and took back control when she took a breath. “And now back to the Quidditch, Royal Wargs still leading Hogwarts Puffs 110 to 100….”
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Royal Academy
Sports Ground
27 Oct 96
13:00
Harry had managed to watch a couple of games of Quidditch and was happy. The kids took advantage and dragged him away to the Promenade, the older girls all with babies on hips. Elena Skinner Potter, former Death Eater daughter, now thirteen-year-old Hogwarts Warg third form, was charged with the care and feeding of Harry by Nym before they left. She nodded seriously and dragged him away by the hand. The Potter brood slew the Promenade dead. Glenda, seeing them leave, took a remote microphone and one of the new Extendable Ear things and gave a running commentary.
Bruce Titterhorn was lost in thought. Glenda was performing a valuable service. The female, and some of the male listeners too, hung on her every word about the absolutely yummy Duke Potter and his Most Ancient and Most Noble House. It was a little much when combined with the Quidditch, though. What they needed was a simulcast on a separate channel. Hmmm, channel 3 had that bizarre old purple pervert Derwent Shimpling telling bawdy jokes all day—the same old bawdy jokes, mostly. He could be cut down to after Court and that would free up the channel for the—erm—Duke’s View? View of the Duke? Notes from the Realm? Dissecting the Duchy? Hmmm, that had promise. Work on the tagline and title later; shoot Duchess Rita a messenger now.
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Royal Academy
Sports Ground
27 Oct 96
13:00
Augusta Longbottom sat with Frank, Alice, Neville, and Romilda in the Wizengamot box of the section four wedge of seats. Griselda Marchbanks sat next to her.
“Augusta, have you read Bellatrix’s letter?”
“Yes, Griselda.”
“And?”
“I didn’t like the idea at first, but I believe on further reflection it’s the way to go, Griselda.”
“I thought the same thing, Augusta. After all, Harry would maintain absolute veto power and as we’re all sworn we can’t really go against him anyway without being declared forfeit when Elizabeth or the Realm should find out. I do think we need a citizen’s oath that includes the same type of affect.”
“Have you talked to the other members, Griselda?”
“Yes, actually, Augusta. They’re of the same mind. We’ll ask Duchess Bellatrix to get us the proper assistance from Mr. Major and Mr. Blair and announce the rules and procedures after we, errrh, determine the constituency.”
Augusta laughed. “I know, I think we need some classes first. Bellatrix covered all of that first past the post, single-member district plurality twaddle with way too much verve and élan. I think her inner Slytherin is having a continuous orgasm over this.”
“Augusta!”
“Mother!”
“Gram!”
“Hehehe.”
Augusta looked around. “No one else? Fine, then. Bah! All of you, grow up. And I heard that giggle, Romilda. I believe it’s time to discuss a handfasting for two young people I know. Frank, go find William Vane. Alice, go with him; this is too important to be left to men. Once they nod and shake hands, you and Camille work out the details.”
Augusta looked around at the slack faces and sighed. “What, did you have a relapse and take Nev and Romy with you? Go on, all of you, scoot!” She waved her hands at them as if they were wayward ducks.
Griselda covered her mouth with a gloved hand as Augusta chivvied her brood into motion. After they had shuffled off and Augusta sat smiling, she looked at her friend. “Happy then, Augusta?”
“Ecstatic. I owe that boy more than could ever be repaid. Why, what he did for Frank and Alice alone….”
Griselda nodded. Augusta wasn’t the only one who owed. “We should do something for him.”
“Let’s give him something he can use and get control of the Realm, Griselda. Let’s give him a life instead of a war.”
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Royal Academy
Sports Ground
27 Oct 96
20:00
“And here we are, gentle beings. Sport has wrapped up for the day with that dramatic 300–150 win by the Harpies over Slytherin and we’ll bring you the roundup after Court. Duchess Hestia has opened Court and the Aurors have brought the twelve offending subjects forward for judgment.”
“Yes they have, Percy. The Wizengamot’s board is all green lights and here we go in a twelve-on-one class four duel. The Duke seems to be playing with these as he stands leaning on his staff. Oh, there’s an AK from that Russian gangster and the Duke responds in his customary manner. Some more ashes for the pitch there. The rest are winding down now, and there’s the marking. Geoffrey leads the new bound men away and Duchess Nymphadora is approaching with the two members of the Regiment up on charges.”
“Oh, and I’d rather face the lash than that disappointed look from the Duke, Percy, Daniel.”
Daniel Boxlighter and Percival Gribbs looked at Glenda and let her continue. “You can actually feel his disappointment all the way up here, gentle beings. What must it be like to be the object of that and stand fifteen feet from him?
“Duchess Hestia has conjured two stout posts and the prisoners have been stripped of their blouses, turned about, shackled to the post, and offered the stick. Smart men, those—they’ve taken the offer.
“Duchess Sarah is assembling the Regiment on the pitch to observe punishment. Duchess Susan is reading the Charges and Specifications. And our Duke pronounces punishment for conduct unbecoming a member of the Regiment: ten lashes.
“In an obvious agony of conscience, our Duke has conjured a bullwhip of about ten feet in the thong and maybe twenty-four inches in the fall.”
Daniel looked at Percy and mouthed, “How the Hades does she know that?” Percy had no idea because he didn’t know what she was talking about. To him a whip was a whip.
“Our Duke has steeled himself now and stepped forward. It looks like Private Nelson is first, and the Duke lays on with a will. Nelson’s Company Commander Duchess Padma Patil Potter counting off the strokes and two, three, four—Nelson being a real man, here at least—five, six—oh, finally the first outcry—seven—oh, that one drew blood—eight, nine, ten. Finally that’s over, to the Duke’s obvious relief as well as everyone else’s. The medics rush forward to see to Nelson and our poor Duke turns to Santos.
“His Company Commander Duchess Megan Jones Potter steps forward bravely and one, two, three—oh my, a outcry from Santos—four, five—that one’s drawn blood—six, seven, eight, nine, ten—and it’s all over, thank Morgana.
“Our Duke stands head down on the pitch with the coiled whip and I believe I just saw a tear fall. It’s so hard to tell through my own.”
Perci was amazed; Glenda sat there as dry-eyed as if she were a mummy, using that now quavering voice from her smiling lips.
“And that nasty little Imelda Talley, Teen Witch Weekly reporter—more like vulture—has snapped a photo, rudely intruding on the Duke’s solitude. Oh I say, good show, our Duchess Nymphadora has the little imp firmly in hand. Our Duke has thrown the whip on the pitch and incinerated it. One wonders if the Realm will allow the grass to return to the site of the Duke’s pain or if it will be forever barren.”
Percy and Daniel wanted to cheer the spectacular performance by Glenda. They gave air claps which she acknowledged with a regal nod as she let the dead air stretch for perhaps fifteen seconds, an eternity in radio. Bruce was absolutely losing his mind. It appeared he might fall on his knees and worship at Glenda’s feet.
Percy leaned forward and switched on his microphone. “And after that painful moment of Regimental history one never wishes to see repeated, here is the Sunday sports roundup….”
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Potter Castle
Deep Holds
27 Oct 96
20:26
Harry and the subdued bonded plus Andrew and Imelda faded into the deep holds. The wards were moving their infant and younger siblings back to the Castle as planned. Harry stood apart for a moment. That really had been a tear.
“All right there, then, Harry?”
“Fine, Andrew, just need a minute. That was the most painful thing I’ve ever done.”
Nym nodded. “Surprisingly, yes. It really hurt to have to do that. Imelda, you’d better have gotten a good picture. I never want to go through that again.”
A very sober Imelda nodded and started carefully developing the single frame she had taken from her knees on the pitch looking up into Harry’s agonized face, his tear-tracked eyes focused on the bloody whip in his right hand, his lip curled in disgust. That it was at himself didn’t need to be bruited about. It was a shockingly powerful image. Jacquelyn Parkinson Potter would turn this image combined with her, her mates’, and Harry’s feelings into a nearly sentient series of wizarding portraits of Harry, one for each of the main magical pubs in every public magical area of the Realm, and the most powerful of them for the lobby of the Ministry of Magic. The trademark of all the paintings would be the identical coiled bloody whips in all of them. Regimental soldiers were known to become rapidly sober on finding the burning green glare of one of the portraits focused on them. The photograph would be blown up and be posted in every public house by writ and many homes by choice.
Xhang Li Meng approached Harry and knelt gracefully. “Master, we await your judgment.”
Harry turned to him. “We don’t have to fight, do we?”
“At least a little, Master; it is customary.”
“Well, get up then.”
Harry walked to the center of the hall and turned around. “Well, let’s go—all of you at once. I have better things to do.”
The Chinese vampires looked at each other and then attacked. Amidst the shrieks Nym turned to Imelda. “Time for you to go, Imelda.”
“Nym! Let me stay, please? I won’t write anything about it or take pictures. I won’t tell anyone either without your and Harry’s permission, you have my oath.”
A pale nimbus surrounded her, to everyone’s surprise, and Nym sighed. “All right, but if he gets confused and mates you, don’t say I didn’t warn you.”
Imelda nodded. “I’ll be careful, Nym,” and she scampered to the edge of the fight.
“Nym, you do know they’re all male vampires, right?”
“Of course, Amelia, but why spoil it for her?” Amelia Fastida looked at Nym and burst out laughing.
Andrew watched the fight nervously. “Errrh, shouldn’t we help Harry?”
“More like we should help those poor vampires, Andrew. Harry is kicking the crap out of them.”
“Zsuzsa! Language!”
“Channeling Mi, mother? I thought she had to be dead and you alive, not vice versa.”
Nym had to sit down. Amelia Fastida, vampire goddess, made an extremely odd looking fish out of water. Soon all the mates had joined their primary Alpha in her laughter. Harry walked up. “What did I miss?”
“Your mates’ latest comedy routine, Harry. Through beating up vampires, then
Harry shrugged at Andrew. “They all got tired, I guess.”
Andrew turned and looked out over the hold. The vampires were all unconscious and Mopsy and Flopsy were moving between them with baskets of blood boluses. He shook his head. “Come on, comedian, let’s go play with the babies.”
Harry nodded and they all faded to the Ducal apartment.
Imelda squeed delightedly and charged into the bedroom. No reporter had ever even been inside Potter Castle and here she was in the holy of holies.
Rita rolled her eyes. “Harry!”
“Sorry, Rita, I forgot.”
Rita shook her head and started for the bedroom, holding a hand in front of her eyes. Imelda was taking pictures and popping flashbulbs like machine gun fire.
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