Review for Call me what you want, but I'm real

Call me what you want, but I'm real

(#) Kid_Vicous 2011-04-23 03:13:31 AM

The Ieros are witches? Now THAT'S original. The writing was good in this chapter, well done. But remember, when a new speaker talks the dialogue starts on a new line. Some of Frank and his mum's speech runs on the same line and it's quite confusing to make out who's saying what. But this is really interesting!

Author's response

Sorry I guess I forgot to add the spaces. I write these on paper then type them up and post. When I write, I put little marks then forget to make them on the computer.....

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