I liked reading it, but when it got to the part after the guard threw him in his cell it kind of got confusing. Gerard hates his voice, yet he just randomly starts talking. A lot. To a stranger that he just met (hot as he may be.) And I may be wrong, but him thinking that Frank was hot and what not kinda came out of nowhere. There was no, "By the way, I'm gay" thoughts in there, which should probably have been mentioned in his thoughts because when you're gay and in prison, shit happens. Y'know?
Anyway, I look forward to reading more whenever you've got it up.
Yeah I know I just felt that the antagonist of the story shouldn't mention that he was gay since a frerard and it's basically expected and you basically find out he's into guys when he calls frank hot. The key word though was "perhaps" aka maybe, probably, etc. Although he actually doesn't randomly start talking it's brought on by an outburst because the guard is annoyingly rude which is why his voice was all crusty and whisper like. It probably gets confusing cause when the cops tried to get info from him he was also scared into silence on top of his mental inability to talk and by him trying to talk it sounded like "a kitten being strangled." I know that HUGE dialogue of explanation was like whuuut? But as he started talking to Frank his voice got stronger. I probably should've added in that he started off weak but got stronger in voice as he went on but in my mind since I already figured that I thought everyone else would too. Also Gerard doesn't look gay in prison like he's not spewing rainbows and skipping everywhere with a lisp, he's just to himself and he looks like a pretty average loner with a tinge of creepiness. No one really fucks creepy people. And last of all I stocked up on my jail knowledge there's really no one there to harass you and shit in the open (the "playground") cause of all the guards and stuff, also most jails inmates make up their own rules and will own hurt you if you break one of them, which Gerard's never done... So far (spoiler alerttt). But all the harassment stuff and the explanation of sexuality WILL COME LATER first chapter is WAY to early to be spewing out all of that info in my eyes.