I would love to know how old Harry and Ginny are supposed to be during this 'fic.
Why would Dumbledore restrict Harry from playing Quidditch?
If you're trying to parodize inexplicably-manipulative-Dumbledore or Ginny-as-skank 'fics, then I'm afraid you haven't quite managed it. You've depicted violence, but it's meaningless violence.
I think this story could move from badfic replica to badfic parody if you acknowledged the discrepancies but refused to explain them (You come close with the "If he'd realized how rich he was, he'd have hired his own private tutors."). Perhaps you could say something about, "Ginny, who had managed to afford breast implants despite the fact that her family had no money," or "Dumbledore who had eaten a maggot-flavored Bertie Bott bean and turned mean over the summer."
Author's response
Whoops, it seems you sent the say review twice...
Anyway, again, right on the ball. To give you a little background, this was written for a "Kill Ginny" challenge of sorts, and I've never had any intense hatred for the character.. can you see the problem there? I was struggling! Meaningless violence? True, but it my defense, I was just trying to be violent. It's not something I'm talented at describing.
Like I said before, little editing, and nothing but a few minutes spared. I'll mark it on my constently growing "to-edit" list. Thanks for the pointers and the review. It's always appreciated ^^