WARNINGS: Hmmmm, ummmm gay relationships, disfunctional life styles. I seriously DO NOT recommend anyone live like this. You would probably die.
Chapter One: New Year's Resolution
I WILL NOT
Drink more then four beers in one sitting.
Waste money on pointless things: magazines, self help books and pot.
Kiss any more men. Even if it is just for show or a game of spin the bottle, girl friend is beginning to get suspicious.
Smoke any more pot.
Spend more time with Mikey and my friends then I do with my girl friend.
Ignore my girl friends text messages and phone calls as I am supposed to love her dearly.
Get jealous that Frank fucking Iero has a better life then me because I am not jealous of him.
Obsess over the fact that I still remain unpopular and uncool even though I am in college now.
Have crushes on men ... I am not gay.
Spend time with the pot smoking guys in the room next door who seem to have taken a liking to me. I loose too much time that way.
Replace study time for drinking time.
Bitch about Frank Iero behind his back.
Sulk about having a girl friend who really doesn't get me, a best friend who doesn't drink or smoke pot and who really doesn’t get me, an art teacher who hates me despite it being the only subject I’m good at and a brother living so far away from me, to far away from me.
Stop drinking so much beer.
Start going to the college gym, after all, my fees are going towards using it and I am getting a beer belly.
Buy some new clothes and get a hair cut. The homeless vampire look is not in anymore.
Find a job for the weekends to get more money for pot - er - for lifestyle change.
Stop smoking pot.
Stop hanging out with my brother so much. People are getting suspicious.
Be more confident.
Study for all my subjects, not just art.
Get up straight away when wake up in the mornings.
Stop obsessing over hating Frank Iero.
Spend more time with my girl friend, even if she does drive me insane.
Buy more porn, just to prove to everyone and myself that I am still straight.
Form a functional, grown-up relationship with my girl friend.
Learn to play "Sweet Home Alabama" on the guitar, just to show everyone I can.
Get a life.
AN: Yep, short, I know. I'll put next chapter up now, just so you actually get a taste for what it's going to be like.
Lurve to know what you guys think as I write only for you. He he. Hope you like the idea.