Watch you drink, never let it out of sight.
During the time that we had become friends, Mikey and I had gotten relatively close, because we went to school and worked together. He mentioned a girl sometimes, but he never referred to her as his girlfriend, so I assumed he was free. I flirted sometimes, and he flirted back, but it never really went farther then that. I was trying to trust the opposite sex, and living with my father made that almost impossible to do, but I did try.
I was busy stocking shelves when I heard Mikey's voice somewhere behind me. My smile brightened as I turned around to greet him, but I felt my face drop when I saw him holding a girls hand. She was pretty, I could admit that. She had dark brown hair, almost black, with blue eyes and a vertical labaret. She was petite, just a bit smaller than I was, and she had one of those voices that guys loved to hear.
I returned back to my shelves, hoping not to be seen, but Mikey came over to me and introduced me to his girlfriend.
"Tara, this is my friend Izzy, Izzy, my girlfriend Tara."
We shook hands, and talked briefly. She was quite pleasant, even though I didn't want to think so. I thought that Mikey and I might have been getting somewhere, but this just crushed my hopes.
"Well we’ve gotta get going, I'll see you tomorrow." Mikey waved and then took his girlfriends hand and trotted off in the other direction. I watched them disappear, and felt stupid for thinking that I had a chance with him. For one, we were just friends, and two, apparently he didn't realize that he was a wanted guy.
After eating lunch with him and Olivia one day, I went to my afternoon class only to have a couple of girls approach me and question me about Mikey. I even heard girls I didn't even know talking about him from time to time in the hallways. He was one of those guys that didn't realize how good-looking he was. Those were the kinds of guys I was attracted to the most.
A few nights later, Olive and I went to a party at another one of her friends parties. Mikey and Tara were already there, snuggling together on the couch with drinks in their hands, when we walked in. I immediately directed myself into a different room. not wanting to be in a bad mood the whole evening. It wasn't a huge party, but there were enough people to fill the room to an almost comfortable capacity, so I could easily avoid the two.
Olivia took me about the party, introducing me to people I recognized from school, some whom I hadn't seen before. Faces become a blur as I consumed the alcohol that we bought. I was a cheap drunk, so after four coolers, I was already buzzing hard. I didn't want to get too drunk, because that's when I tended to start rambling and telling people everything, so I had to be careful. But I kept running into Mikey and his girlfriend everywhere. I tried to stop drinking, I didn't want to let anything slip, even though I didn't want to live the lie and wonder what was happening back home, but drinks just kept ending up in my hand..
After awhile, I was comfortable talking with people who I didn't really know, I even talked to Frank, thanks to the drinks, and I felt myself starting to drift off. I put my drink aside and went outside on the porch. We were on the fifth floor of a decent looking apartment. I sat down and shoved my legs through the railing poles. I wanted to clear my head before I could do anything stupid. I wanted to come down, and get away from Mikey. Why was I so jealous that he had a girlfriend? I mean, sure we were getting close, but really we hadn’t known eachother all that long.
The air didn't seem to do anything, my head was still cloudy, and I could barely move. When someone took a seat beside me, I didn't even notice.
"Izzy?" a voice said, and I almost fell back.
"Yeah?" I spluttered when I was sitting upright again.
I squinted my eyes and looked at the guy who was talking to me. There was a mess of dark hair, and a small frame from what I could make out, my eyes wouldn't focus. But the voice seemed familiar.
"What's your name?" I managed.
"Oh, hi Frank!" I said loudly, smiling in his general direction.
"Are you okay?"
"Uhm, yeah I think so. I'm just tired, I want to go home. Can you help me find Olivia?"
"Yeah, of course. Here, let me help you help." He disappeared from infront of me, and then I felt his arms under my arm pits, picking me up off the ground. I giggled and wrapped my arms around his neck and he held my waist with his arms.
"Do you see them?" I mumbled, holding onto his neck for dear life, for I knew I couldn't hold myself up properly. He never answered my question, and just kept pulling me along through the people who looked at us and kind of smirked. They all knew what he was thinking, and when his hands tightened around my lower waist, I did too, but I couldn't muster the energy to push him away.
I shut my eyes for a few minutes, and when I opened them, I was lying down on someone's unmade bed. Frank, I assume, was fussing about with something, and I tried to rollover to see, but my body didn't seem to want to do what my head was telling it to. That was when a horrible thought occurred to me: I could have been drugged. I had been talking to him, and he had a bottle of beer in his hand. But I had seen him take a drink from it before he had given it to me, or had I? I could not for the life of me remember, and it began to frustrate me, and I started crying. Tears rolled down my cheeks, but I didn't make a sound.
"It's okay Izzy," Frank whispered, wiping my tears away. "I'm going to be gentle with you." I could feel him undo my pants, and pull them down. Then he pulled me up and my limp body fell against him. He put his hand under my shirt and then pulled my shirt up and over my head. He then lay me down on the bed as I tried my hardest to move away, but all I could do was make weak noises.
"Please don't," I pleaded when I felt him take off my bra. "Please don't touch me." Bad memories of my ex Liam came flooding back as he kissed and licked my breasts. "Stop!" I tried to scream, as tears began parading down my cheeks, but I was helpless the help myself. He literally ripped my underwear off and then began ripping off his clothes. I continued crying as he pushed his member into me and thrust as deep as he could go. I moaned and cried. I tried to rollover, but my muscles would not move at all. I had never felt so disgusting in my life, not even when Liam had tried to do the same thing. I didn't know what to do, and I couldn't do anything anyway.
I continued to try and fight him, but I was too out of it to have any affect on him. After a while, I gave up on trying to do anything. I lay lifelessly underneath him as he continued to have his way with me. I felt vomit starting to come up in the back of my throat, but I swallowed it back. His face was right above mine, and he started kissing me. I closed my eyes, trying to make everything disappear, but his grunts were too loud to ignore.
As he continued to thrust into me, just as hard as the last time, my head began to spin. Frank whispered something in my ear, before he pulled out and spilled himself over my stomach. It felt hot and sticky stuff all over my stomach, and that's when I threw up.
"Shit" I heard Frank say, and he rolled me on my side. I felt a bit stronger and I managed to swat him away. "I'm trying to help you," He replied, but I kicked his side.
"Fuck then, do it yourself." I flopped back on my back as he put his clothes back on, and then he left without a glance back at me. I tried to sit up or pull something over to cover me, but I had already used my energy to push Frank away.
I'm not sure how long I was there for, but it felt like an eternity. In between my legs throbbed with pain, that felt endless too. I felt disgusting, I didn't want to look at myself, I didn't want to be in my skin. I felt dirty all over, and not just physically. I wanted to fall asleep and never wake up again.
When I was in the middle of mustering up my strength again, the door burst open and I heard swear words. Someone fell into the wall and someone else yelled. Someone approached me, and I tried to yell.
"Calm down," the soothing voice told me, but I couldn’t, it was as if something had snapped inside me. The stranger's hands slowly came towards me, and I tried to scream again.
"Please calm down" he pleaded. "I want to help you."
"Don't touch me," I croaked.
"I'm going to have to. I need to get you cleaned up honey. We need to call the police." He slowly approached me with something in his arm. I tried to cover myself the closer her got but it didn't work too well.
"Don't you dare call the cops!" I cried as he pulled me up and wrapped something around me. "Let me go! They can't come, I can't talk to them!" But he ignored me, picked me up in his arms, and placed me in a small chair in the corner of the room. He resumed to strip the sheets off the bed, and then went to the cupboard to get new ones. I tightened the grip on my sheet when he approached me, picked me up, and placed me on the bed again. He pulled the comforter over me and looked down at me.
"Why can't I call the cops?" His serious tone only worried me more.
"Just don't call the cops, or I swear to god I will tell them you did this," I whispered harshly. He didn't look angry, more shocked and worried. He nodded slowly. "Please don't let him touch me again," I whispered. "Don't let anyone touch me again."
"I won't," he whispered, still looking down at me.
"Promise?" My head was spinning and I could feel myself falling asleep.
"I promise I'll take care of you." He smiled gently at me, and I rolled away from him. There was no way I was going to tell my father, and I wasn't going to the police. If I went to them, then they'd surely find out who I was really. So the only people who would know about this were Frank, of course, me, and the guy who promised to take care of me.