Here I was pacing my room back and forth resisting the urge to pull my hair out. Asia was still asleep while I tried to gather my thoughts together. Today was the day, they would all be here. He would be here. Three years of not having to face him, only to crash and burn. This was not good. My stomach was twisting and I scoffed as thought about him. I really don't have any good thoughts to convey of him. It all comes down to that single day and even then, I really hate to bring that up. I could call in sick? No, that would not work. I already took off time when Asia had a high ever. Charlie would most definitely not like it at all.
I hissed and went to wake Asia up and dressed her as quickly as possible. I gave her breakfast and when I walked her to the daycare I hugged her for a minute too long. I smiled as her small arms wrapped around my neck and I squeezed her. I pulled back and stared into those hypnotizing eyes.
"You know I love you right?" I whispered. Her head nodded causing her hair to shake. I put a hand to her cheek and brushed her bangs out of her eyes.
"I'll be back later okay? have fun." I said softly. She kissed my cheek and ran off to her friends who were impatiently waiting for her.
And I was alone in the car pondering my thoughts as I waited for traffic to flow. I rolled my eyes as 'Mama' began to play on the radio. It was a reflex, as I hit the off button. When I arrived in the parking lot. I couldn't move. My hands felt glued to the steering wheel and my went..blank.
"Maybe they won't remember you." I sympathized with myself. Who am I kidding. I'm pushing my luck to the fullest. I ran a finger through my hair as I carefully got out and walked in. I steadied myself on my office chair where I closed my eyes and began to hum quietly to myself. I snapped them open as Charlie came into the room with the same grin as usual. How he manages to be upbeat about is way beyond me.
"Are you prepared? The guys should be here in the next 30 minutes." he said calmly.
"30 minutes?! I thought they were scheduled to come in later?" I stammered.
"I know. Aparrently they have another interview later on. They need to bump up the time." I bit my lip and tried so hard not to scream.
"Okay. I'll get the designs ready." I empathized. Charlie smiled and walked out and I collapsed on my desk. Feeling absolutely empty as I stared into nothing.
It took the whole 30 minutes to gather everything they needed or may need for the album. Thankfully I did not have to sketch this time. I cursed Katie for not being the one to do this instead of me. Just the cherry on top of a wonderful year. I grinded my teeth as Charlie came in and gave the signal that they were here. I nodded slowly and reluctantly got up and followed him the conference room. I stayed behind as I could see black hair sitting against me. I heard Gerard's roar of laughter as it made me smile. just go in there and be casual. It'll only be worse if you act wierd. I made slowly in there where the voices died down and Charlie
stood the door where I gasped as saw them for the first time in a long time. Mikey no longer had glasses. His once chestnut hair was now black. Ray's hair was slightly longer but still poofy just as I remembered it. Gerard had his hair parted and Frank's hair was a short mohawk. But ofcourse they were not the one's to catch my eye. It was him. His sandy blonde hair shined in the light and smile made my knees slightly buck. I stopped breathing as Charlie caught my attention.
"Okay guys, well I think Talisa can take over from here." he smiled at me and I smiled back nervously as he left the door. I tried to speak but nothing would come out. It's too late to go back. They know me by the way they were staring at me making extremely uncomfortable.
"Umm hi guys. I'm Talisa..I don't know if-"
"Tissa?!" Frank's voice chimed in. I swallowed hard. So much for not being recognized. I nodded and they all smiled, well only 4 of them did. The last one was looking away awkwardly and I did the same. Talk about cutting the tension with a knife.
"Yeah it's me." I responded softly.
"Dude! We haven't seen you since forever! You work here?" he smiled whole heartedly and I couldn't help but smile back. My best friends were in front of me and It feels so different now.
"Yeah. Been here for awhile now." I nodded.
"Nice. You look great" Mikey spoke up.
"Thank you, Mikey. You all look amazing too. It's been too long."
"Definitely." Ray cut in.
"Well guys, I have everything planned out if you wanna take a look." I brought the samples over where Eventually they all agreed on the red cover for the album and the tracking list for the songs. My hands felt clammy as I felt his eyes burning a hole through me. I couldn't face him and I know he was feeling the same way.
"So Frank, are you and Jamia still together?" he nodded and held up his hand to display a shiny placid silver ring.
"Yes and loving it." he giggled.
"I'm happy to hear that, buddy." I grinned. I looked at Bob for a millisecond and then looked away when turned to me. This was not necessary and I was grateful when Charlie had come in.
"All we all finished?" the guys nodded and Charlie smiled.
"Good. Real good." he cooed.
I was looking out the window when my heart stopped as our eyes made contact. I showed no emotion while his looked suprised. My lip quievered as I looked into those blue eyes stared at me and only one thing came up. I couldn't handle it. I turned away.
"Err.. guys? could you excuse me for a minute?" I smiled and walked out before anyone could say anything. I ran to the bathroom and when no one was in sight I fell against the wall and slid down and the bottled up tears had broken free. I let out all those feelings as I recalled what had just taken place. I'm such a coward. I see him for a short time and already i'm sitting here crying in the bathroom because every damn thing came back to me and I tried for so long to be strong but I couldn't anymore. Physically seeing him, was something I could never prepare myself for, no matter how hard I tried. I wiped away the tears that were stained black as I thought about the one little girl I truly cared for. I couldn't be this way around her. It's not fair.
I stood up and dried my cheeks and washed away the smeared make up. I composed myself and walked out the bathroom door until I was almost knocked down by someone...
Wow, I can't believe it was her. Neither could the guys. It's been to damn long since graduation. I was really excited to see her. I always missed her. We all did. But I also noticed that her and Bob were acting rather strange towards eachother. They hardly made contact yet, it felt like they couldn't stop glancing at one another when the person was turned. It was kinda bugging me and I kind of wanted to ask Tissa about it, but maybe I shouldn't right now. I was on my way to the bathroom when I accidentally bumped into someone. It was Tissa.
"Oh Tissa, I'm sorry." I cooed. She shook her head.
"It's okay Gerard." she smiled.
"Wow I can't believe it's you." I was in slight shock still. She shrugged and nodded.
"I know. I can't believe it either." We stood there for a couple seconds not saying anything.
"We should hang out later if you're not busy...it would be real nice if we could all catch up." I suggested. She seemed unsure and sad. I didn't understand why she was being like this.
"I don't think that's such a good idea." she mumbled.
"Why not?" I asked softly. She was gonna speak but stopped herself. She thought for a minute before finally replying. What's going on with her?!
"Umm Gerard could you do me favor? Can me weet at the cafe at 7th street tomorrow? I think it's best if we talk alone. I'll explain everything tomorrow." she quickly walked away before I could respond. I stood there speechless and felt like an idiot......what was there to explain?
A/N:Getting closer , I hope people are still reading.(: