It’s about two weeks later on a Saturday. You haven’t seen Marshall for this whole time. According to Jake, he says Hailie said that her dad has been in the studio for the last two weeks working on stuff for Relapse 2 and some things for others. You really wish you could see him, you think you’re about ready to tell him the whole truth about how you like him, and that you were lying to him about not liking him. You also plan to tell him about Jordan, and how he’s the reason, you never wanted to get into a relationship until you met, and got to liking Marshall. You plan to tell him the next time you see him, which should be today around lunch because you have to pick up Jake from Hailie’s.
Right now, you’re just sitting home alone, nothing to do. You look at the clock its only 10am. You should be picking Jake up around noon or one. You decide to go tidy up Jakes room sense you have absolutely nothing to do in this world right now. You go upstairs and to his room. You organize everything, hoping that Jake can find his things, you’re almost done when you come across an Eminem CD “Relapse,” you say to yourself. “Hmm, maybe I’ll give it a listen,” you say to yourself. You grab the CD then bring it to your room and put it in the player. You listen to the first few songs and decide that you don’t like them. You glance at the back of the CD. Track 17. Beautiful seems to interest you, so you skip forward to that song. After you listen to it, you decide that the song is amazing, and you would tell him that. After that, you listen to Déjà Vu. You like that one too. I wonder who DeShaun is you think after the song is over. You decide that you will ask him later… You look at the clock after that and its noon. You grab your things put the CD back in Jakes room then head over to Marshalls…. You get though both gates…. You knock on the door and Marshall opens it.
“Ahh Abby, long time no see,” he says and goes for a hug, this time you let him hug you.
“Hey, how’s it goin?” you ask as he lets you in.
“Fine, been busy, haven’t got much sleep, but Im used to it so…,” he says like hes gonna say something else but he don’t… you walk in to the kitchen after Marshall.
“Hey mom,” Jake says from the table. Hes sitting there like hes waiting for food.
“Hey Jake, Hailie, Laney and Whitney,” you say with a smile then sit down at the table next to Whitney. Marshall sits next to you.
“Wanna stay for lunch?” he asks turning to you completely ignoring everyone else at the table.
“Uh… Sure,” you say just for Jakes sake… Plus you still wanna ask those questions, and possibly tell him that you like him. The kids randomly take off into the living room… After about 2 minutes of awkward silence, you and Marshall stand up at the same time then go walk to the living room.
“I… uhh wanted to talk to you,” you say stopping him. He stops immediately
“Yes go, go ahead!” he says like hes excided. Yeah its not what you think you think.
“Uhh… Well… Can we go in a room with a door?” you ask. He sort of smiles.
“No, don’t be a perv,” you say and hit him. You think he likes that tho, which he probably does.
“Im sorry, yeah,” he says and points down the hall. You look over the kids are playing DDR…. You walk into a room that must be some kind of office. “What was you gonna ask me?” he asks shutting the door.
“Uh, first… I actually listened to one of your Cds, Relapse, and I was wondering who’s DeShaun?” you ask confused. All of a sudden, his smile goes to a sad frown. “Was I not supposed to ask that?” you ask somewhat concerned.
“No, its… ok…. I just,” he says…. Then he slowly walks over to the wall and grabs a photo off the wall, turns around, and hands it to you. You stare at the picture for a bit.
“That’s him?” you ask. He nods. You hand him back the picture, he puts it back on the wall then pulls you a chair out then sits down at his desk, and you sit on the chair. He lets out a deep sigh.
“He was my best friend; he was pretty much my brother, that’s how much time we spent together. He was a brother to me. We met when we was about 14, we were at this rap club and I heard him rapping so I went over to him and gave him this paper and told him to come check us out sometime, he shook his head like white boys don’t know how to rhyme. However, he came down anyway. And he really liked my shit… so he invited me to this rap battle and whatnot and yeah from then on, we became brothers. He made me who I am today, he made up our group D12, he did so much for me though out my years…. But yeah…. A few years ago, he was shoot and he died, and that’s why I was doing drugs for a few years. But now I’ve been clean for a year,” he explains. And he looks very sad.
“Oh Marshall Im so sorry,” you say placing your hand on his. He smiles slightly.
“Thanks, it’s been 3 years now, if I was asked that a year ago I wouldn’t been able to tell you,” he says… “I couldn’t even talk about him without crying or wanting to cry,” he says.
You don’t say anything you just stand up and give him a hug. Which sort of shocks him cuz it takes him a few seconds to hug you back, after a few seconds after he hugs you back you let go and sit back down in the chair.
“Uh…” he says confused.
“Don’t get your hopes up, I did that because of your friend,” you say.
“Gee thanks,” he says then smiles. “Maybe I should be sad more often,” he says with an evil smirk.
“Haha don’t even try,” you say and get up. Then the doorbell thing buzzes…. Marshall stands up and goes to leaves the room without saying anything. fuck you think….I guess I’ll tell him later you say following him out the room… you go sit in the kitchen once you see the kids running in there. Marshall brings the pizzas in and sets them on the table along with Mountain Dew and Red Bull. You decide to take a Red Bull and a piece of pizza with everything on it, Marshall sits next to you and get the same thing. The kids keep staring at you and Marshall like something happened in the room…
“What?” Marshall asks with a mouth full of pizza.
“Why did you go in the room with my mom?” Jake asks with a smile.
“She had to talk to me,” he answers like hes guessing the answer and like hes confused.
“Oh sure,” he says then continues to eat.
“Whats that supposed to mean?” you ask glaring at your son.
“Nothing, it was just a question,” he says not looking at you but down at his plate.
After you finish eating, everyone decides to watch a movie without even asking you what you wanna do. You just shrug it off and follow the others into the living room, theres only one spot open and of course, it’s right next to Marshall. You sit down watching the smiles on the kid’s faces. “Ok guys you really need to stop that,” you say giving everyone the evil eye.
“Hey don’t look at me like that, I did nothing,” Marshall says holding up his hands like there was a cop telling him to put his hands up. You watch Obsessed. The whole time no one talks…. You sit there wishing you could tell Marshall how you fell but your so nervous, you’re scared to tell him thinking he my not like you no more cuz you lied to him. After the movie is over the kids disappear downstairs as if they don’t care what you think. You sit there in the living room next to Marshall, nervous as fuck. You kinda don’t wanna tell him no more, but then you do. You sigh loudly, which causes Marshall to stare at you. “You ok?” he asks.
“No, I no...I … I … I damn it,” you say annoyed as your phone starts to ring…you sit there…
“Are you gonna answer that?” Marshall asks.
“No, I …I cant cuz I want to tell you something but I don’t know how,” you say.
“Just say it. That’s what I do,” he says motioning you for to say something. You take a deep breath.
“Fine,” you sigh. “I’ve been lying to you,” you start.
“Huh?” he asks.
“I umm been lying on how I said that I don’t like you cuz of who you are. Well I do like you, I have sense the time you came to my house,” you say, you’re shaking badly.
“You’re shaking,” he says.
“Yeah well Im not good at these kind of things,” you say. “And the only reason I didn’t ever wanna get into a relationship is because of Jordan. He broke my heart, I don’t know if Im even over him, but I hate him so much,” you say. “But I miss him, I loved him,” you say. “Do you know what its like to have someone break your heart like that?” you ask him almost crying.
“Yes, I do,” he says.
“He don’t even care about his son, he wont even send child support,” you say ignoring what he just said. “I can’t believe I loved that asshole, I wasted over 13 years of my life with that asshole the only thing good that I got out of that relationship was Jake,” you say starting to cry. “And I never wanted to start a relationship with you cuz I didn’t wanna get hurt again,” you say crying. He reaches over to you and hugs you.
“Uh?” Hailie says confused. Marshall lets go of you and you wipe your eyes. You both stare at her. “Did I….?” she starts.
“No,” you say quickly.
“What is it Hailie baby,” Marshall asks. Aww hes such a sweet father, I mean look at that tattoo; he loves his babies so much. Damn it I wish Jordan could love Jake as much as Marshall loves his girls you think.
“I have to tell you guys something,” Hailie says. “Jake and I have been going out for the past 3 weeks. Please don’t be mad daddy I really like him,” Hailie says.
“Uhh…” Marshall says like that’s all he can get out. Then he looks over at you.
“Just forget everything I said!!” you yell then run out of the room and to the kitchen.
“Did I?” you hear Hailie ask from the living room.
“No, you can go out with Jake, but only because hes Abby’s son,” you hear Marshall say. You stand in the corner of the kitchen wiping your eyes and trying not to cry anymore.
Marshall walks into the kitchen. “I don’t wanna talk!” you say before he even gets close to you.
“Fine, sorry,” he says and walks on the other side of the kitchen looking all depressed and whatnot… He sits down at the table and puts his head in his hands. You sigh seeing him like that, but you don’t wanna get into a relationship now that the kids are together it’s just too odd… About 15 minutes go by, you stopped crying and you turn around too see Marshall still in the same position as before…. You quietly walk over him; you place your hand on his shoulder, which makes him jump up quickly he looks up at you, he looks really sad.
“Look, I know I just told you I liked you, but now that we found out about the kids, I think its best we stay friends… for now,” you say with your hand still on his shoulder. He sighs.
“Yeah I guess,” he says sadly but somewhat happy, because you said “for now”
“Well I think I better take Jake home now, I gotta see what that call was all about,” you say.
“Yeah ok,” he says.
“Jake! Come on we gotta go!” you yell, he comes into the kitchen.
“Ok,” he says. “You two ok?” he asks.
“Yes we fine,” Marshall answers.
“Ok,” he says.
“Honey, say goodbye to Hailie, then go wait in the car,” you say.
“Ok,” he says confused… You sigh.
“Well I’ll see you later,” you say.
“I guess,” he says sadly.
“Stop acting like it’s the end of the world,” you say.
“Don’t worry Im fine,” he says being all defensive you can tell hes thinking it is the end of the world….
“Ok, well bye,” you say then take you hand off his shoulder and leave the house…
You arrive home; you go straight to your room and slam the door shut. You lied your not fine at all, you want to be with Marshall, you feel like the kids just ruined your life. In addition, you know Marshall feels the same; you can’t ruin Jake and Hailie’s relationship just cuz you wanna be with Marshall. You start to cry… a lot about everything you told Marshall… and how you can’t be with him. “Mom you ok?” Jake asks knocking on the door.
“GO AWAY!” you scream towards the door in tears.
“Fine!” he yells. You sit there and sob… your phone starts to ring, you figure its Wanda cuz she called earlier but you didn’t answer. You pick up the phone but its says ‘Unknown caller’