I was on a hill, looking out at a beautiful sunset, the pinks, blues, oranges, and reds blending in perfect harmony.
“Patrick…. This is beautiful!” I said, turning away from the breathtaking sight to stare at my wonderful boyfriend.
He blushed the exact same shade of pink that was in the sky.
“It’s nothing, Pete. I just wanted to share with you the place where I first realized I loved you.” he said softly, returning my gaze lovingly
I gathered him up in a hug and rested my forehead against his left shoulder, feeling his arms snake around my back while mine rested on his waist.
“Thank you, Tricky. This is the most wonderful gift anyone has ever given me.” I whispered into the warm flesh of his neck. “I love you.”
My eyes flew open and I fell out of bed, only the sheets twisted around me and I didn’t fall all the way.
“Fuck!” I said to myself, thumping my head against the floor.
I turned my head to the door and glared at it as I said ‘come in’, wanting to throttle whoever it was that interrupted my nap.
The door opened and Patrick came shuffling in, looking at the floor before looking at me and staring at me again.
I normally would smirk at this, but I was annoyed with him.
“What. The. Fuck. Do. You. Want?” I said harshly.
“I, uh….. Just uh…..” he said, obviously looking for something to say.
Aw, I think I scared him. Ha! Serves him right. I was having such a nice dream-
“Do you want to go out for some coffee?” I heard.
I blinked and stared at him.
“Coffee?” I asked, the word sounding foreign on my tongue.
“Yeah, coffee. I’m allowed to take patients out into town as long as they never leave my sight. No one has ever slipped by me. If they did, I would be out of a job.” he explained.
After he said that, his eyes clouded over with something akin to sadness. I was surprised. He didn’t seem like a guy who would ever get sad. He seemed like the kind who worked their whole life, doing something mundane, perfectly content with how he sees the world. Seeming to have never been hurt. Not the kind who knows how the world actually is and knows of it’s horrors and cruelness.
“Okay.” I found myself agreeing softly. I knew that he was similar to me. He had been hurt and he saw the world the same as me.
I don’t know how I saw that in just the brief moment it was there. I wasn’t normally that attentive.
Patrick seemed surprised. I don’t think he actually expected me to accept.
After I had changed into some new clothes, some girl named Julia or Julie or Jane gave us some big speech about what and what not to do while out, when to be back and shit. Blah, blah, blah, honey.
After she finished, Patrick and I walked away, her shouting something after us that I didn’t exactly catch, but I didn’t care. My mind soon drifted to ‘us’.
I was surprised. I liked the sound of ‘us’ and ‘Patrick and I’. What the hell? What was up with that? I wasn’t starting to like Tricky was I?
It took me a few moments to notice.
What the fuck?! Tricky? Why the hell did I call him Tricky?
I was snapped from my thoughts when I heard the peaceful purring of the car cut off.
I realized we were at Starbucks, the very same one I passed by everyday to and from work.
I got out with Patrick and walked inside Starbucks. We walked to the counter to order and I caught sight of a beautiful blonde. She was filing her nails and her hair was up in a ponytail. She was smacking her gum obnoxiously loud.
We reached the counter and she looked up, eyes bored, until she saw me and Patrick. She stared at my hot-as-fuck body and then glared at Patrick. She then painted on a smirk.
“What can I get for you, Patty?” she sneered.
Patrick’s reaction was instantaneous.
“I want the usual, Gina. And don’t mess it up. You know I can have you fired. You know I have influence.” Patrick said, glaring at the blonde, Gina, with more hate than I could even imagine. Patrick was completely different than he usually was.
She flinched. She sneered at him and called back his order before turning to me and looking me up and down. She smiled flirtatiously up at me.
“What can I get you, handsome?” she purred, blinking up at me.
Normally, I would have immediately started flirting back, but for some reason, I didn’t like her. She was normally the type I went for, but because of how she treated Tricky, I hated her.
“I’ll have a chocolate cappuccino with extra whipped cream and a caramel drizzle please.” I said, bored.
She scowled and called back my order and me and Tricky walked back to a booth.
I realized that I had, once again, referred to him as Tricky. I mean, what the hell? Pet names? That is so out of character. Well, it was now. For a while at least. Maybe a couple months because of-
I was snapped from my thoughts by the waitress who brought our drinks. I took mine gratefully with a small thank you before taking a sip. Yummy!
I stared out the window to my left, taking sips from my coffee every once in a while.
I glanced at Patrick from the corner of my eye and saw him fidgeting. Before I could ponder why, he suddenly froze with a strange expression on his face. It was gone in the blink of an eye and he spoke.
“So…. How’s the weather?” he asked.
I almost laughed aloud from the question. I somehow managed to keep a straight face as I raised an eyebrow.
“I don’t know, you tell me.” I deadpanned.
He sighed, suddenly crossing his arms and puffing his cheeks out like a little kid.
“Well sor-ry! I was only trying to make conversation.” he pouted.
I blinked from the suddenness before I laughed. It had been a long time since I had last laughed and it felt good.
“You’re so weird.” I said, my signature grin spreading across my face for the first time in months.
I was amused when Patrick blushed. It was so cute! So, he was interested in me. Well, that’s not surprising. I mean, I am hot after all.
His blush disappeared and he asked, “So, how old are you?”
“I’m 24, you?” I returned.
“I’m only 21 myself.” he answered.
I was surprised. He was 3 years younger than me? I mean, yeah, he looks a little more childish than me, but I hadn’t really thought about how old he was before.
“Really? So you’re still in college?” I asked.
He shook his head.
“I finished two years ago. I took college courses in my last two years of high school.” he explained.
I was shocked again. Wow.
“Wow, you‘re such a nerd!” I exclaimed, taking a sip of my coffee, which was luke-warm by now. Wow, had it been that long already?
He laughed a little, too.
“Yeah, I guess so.”
“So, do you come here often?” I asked childishly, feeling better than I had in forever.
He laughed and it was as cute as he was!
“Yeah, I do. Everyday I come here and order my morning and afternoon coffee. How about you?” he asked.
“Pretty much the same.” I shrugged.
“Really?” he asked, looking a little surprised.
“Yeah.” I answered, taking a sip of my coffee.
“Hey, what did you order?” he asked suddenly. “Sorry, I was thinking when you ordered.”
“That’s fine. And I ordered a chocolate cappuccino with extra whipped cream and a caramel drizzle. It’s really good.” I told him, taking another sip.
“It sounds good.” he told me, taking a sip of his own.
“What did you get?” I asked curiously. “When you ordered, you just said the usual.”
Suddenly, a loud series of beeps interrupted him.
He pulled his phone out of his pocked, checked the caller I.D., and sighed before answering.
“What?” he asked in annoyance.
“Patrick!” I heard, and Patrick yanked the phone away from his ear.
I looked at him weird. Who the hell was that? She was so loud!
He brought the phone back up to his ear and sighed again.
“Yes, Sandra?” he asked.
She said something that made Patrick sigh in contentment and smile softly, looking so fucking adorable I wanted to hide him away from the world.
He whispered something that I didn’t quite catch, his smile growing a little, but I knew it wasn’t meant for my ears by the look of love in his eyes.
She said something and he answered with a simple “What?” in a normal voice.
I heard her reply as she screamed, “I’m in Chicago!”
“Really? That’s great!” he said, his smile turning excited.
She said something and Patrick’s smile disappeared as he stared at his coffee in dumb shock.
“You are?” he asked.
She said something that cause Patrick to glance at me and turn red.
“N-no!” he said quickly.
She replied and Patrick started stuttering.
There was silence for a few moments before Patrick chuckled, having returned to his normal color.
“That’s fine.” he replied.
Patrick groaned at whatever she said next before saying, “I love you too, Sandra. Bye.” he said before he hung up.
I stared at Patrick as I sat there in shock.
Patrick was in love with a girl named Sandra and she was in Chicago. He wasn’t gay and he didn’t like me. Did I read the signs wrong? Why did he invite me out? Does he pity me? Is that it?
I decided that must be it. Why else would he invite me out?
“What?” Patrick asked, squirming with unease.
I snapped out of my thoughts.
“Nothing.” I mumbled.
We left soon after that and we drove back to the rehab center in silence. I saw the worried glances Patrick threw my way, but I was only reminded that it was only out of pity.
When we got back to the center, I was escorted to my room. I laid down on my bed and stared at the ceiling.
Why did the thought of Patrick being in love with someone else make me feel empty? And why did the thought that he was only pitying me make me feel such pain? It was contradictory, but that’s how it felt.
Before long, I fell asleep, confused, empty, and hurt.
How did you like it? Again, I’m so so so so so so so so sorry that I haven’t updated in forever! I hope you enjoyed it though! Thanks for reading. Please review.