A look inside Patrick's head and a new person added to the story. Patrick's become a little deeper.
"-And he's just so frustrating, Andy! He has no respect!" I whined.
I was on my first break of the day and I was complaining to Andy about Pete; I could see Andy was amused. He had never seen me so riled up about a patient. With my natural charisma and 'good-boy-who-never-does-wrong' air, I was always a favorite among the patients, meaning that I had never been treated the way Pete had treated me before.
"He has no right to treat me that way! I was only trying to help! Whatever he's been through, he shouldn't act that way!" I paused before finishing in a small, quivering voice, "I was only trying to help..."
Andy's eyes immediately filled with sympathy and understanding.
"It's okay, Pat. He's probably been through some rough times. You were that way once, remember? You didn't trust anyone and you closed yourself off from everyone. I don't think anyone knows you inside out. Even though we've been friends for 2 years, I don't think even I know you that well. Pat, you still have barriers put up since that time, though even you may not notice it."
I stared at Andy with stony eyes. I didn't like it when he brought up that time. Hated it, in fact. But what he said interested me. I have barriers put up still? I mean, I knew that I still had my moments of defensiveness, but I still had barriers up all the time?
I got up from the chair I had been sitting in and walked out of the room the workers could go to hang out during breaks.
I started walking around aimlessly. I continued to think about how I still had barriers put up. No one knew me that well, huh?
As my thoughts continued through my unique thought pattern, I then thought, 'I want someone to know me well. I want someone to know me inside out, to know immediately if something was wrong, to know exactly how I was feeling just by a single glance.'
And then I realized how badly I wanted this. I had never known how much I had wanted to have a special someone.
I snapped out of my thoughts and looked around. I saw that I was standing in front of a door and the hallway was empty. I looked at the number on the door and saw that it was room 207.
It took me less than a second to realize that it was Pete's room.
I thought, like I always do at the most random points in time, that maybe this was a sign. I had just been thinking that I wanted to have someone who knew me well enough to know how I was feeling, and I ended up at Pete's room. Maybe it was a sign?
I immediately dismissed this thought, deciding that, like always, I was over-analyzing things. I had just simply walked here by chance. I could have ended up at any other person's room.
After that, I noticed that there were a few people in the hallway now, staring at me strangely.
I realized that I must have been standing there a lot longer than I thought. Damn. I needed to stop randomly stopping to think.
I sent the people a sheepish smile and knocked on the door to Pete's room without really thinking about it.
Immediately after I knocked, I froze. What the hell? I had no reason to talk to him again. I only talked to each person once a day.
I heard a thump and a groan, followed shortly by a slightly muffled curse and another soft thump, as if someone were hitting their head against the carpet.
"Come in." said a very disgruntled voice.
I opened the door to see Pete half laying on the floor, his top half, while the other half of him was on the bed, the white sheets twisted around his lower half up to his waist. His head was turned to the door to stare up at me with annoyance. I had obviously interrupted his nap.
"What. The. Fuck. Do. You. Want?" Pete ground out, enunciating each word, obviously angry that I had interrupted him.
"I, uh... Just uh..." My mind drew a blank.
Pete continued to stare at me as I floundered around.
Suddenly, I had an idea.
"Do you want to go out for some coffee?" I asked.
Pete's stare turned into one of surprise.
"Coffee?" he asked slowly, tasting the word, as if he had never heard of it.
"Yeah, coffee. I'm allowed to take patients out into town as long as they never leave my sight. No one has ever slipped by me. If they did, I would be out of a job." I silently added in my head, 'I also would punish myself severely for such a mistake, even though I know I should find another way.'
Something must have showed in my expression, which I was almost positive was blank, because Pete agreed.
We checked in with Julie and told her we were going out for coffee. She gave us the regular, stern speech about how we had to be back before dark and all that shit. I nodded at the right times, having heard the same conversation many times.
Finally, she let us go with a smile.
"Have fun boys!" she called after us, neither of us really caring.
When we got to Starbucks, the very same one I had been at just hours ago, and I walked over to Gina. Cindy only worked from 10 pm to 8am. The coffee shop was 24 hours, so she worked the nightshift while Gina worked the day shift. I didn't like Gina too much. She was the typical preppy, hateful of gay, different people girl, still in her freshman college courses at night school.
"What can I get for you, Patty?" she sneered, purposely calling me 'Patty'. I hated that name with a passion. My mother had used to call me that, and now, whenever someone called me that, joking or not, I glared at them, wanting them to fall six feet under, just like how I was doing with Gina.
"I want the usual, Gina. And don't mess it up. You know I can have you fired. You know I have influence." I said, glaring a hole into her.
She flinched, but then sneered at me and called back my order. She then turned to Pete and looked him up and down. She smiled flirtatiously up at him.
"What can I get you, handsome?" she asked, blinking her eyes slowly in what she thought was a seductive manner.
I was unaffected and upon looking at Pete, he was unaffected as well. She either wasn't his type, or he was gay like me.
I immediately denied the latter. I couldn't allow myself to hope just to be left in disappointment.
Apparently, Pete had ordered while I was stuck in my thoughts, and Gina was scowling. She glared at me as we turned and walked over to a booth. I felt her glare burning through my back as we sat down.
We sat in silence, waiting for our coffees. Even after we had our coffees, silence stretched like years, even though I knew it could only be a few minutes.
I desperately struggled to find some way to get him to talk more than a few words.
I then paused.
Why was I trying so hard? Usually, I had no trouble finding something to talk about. But, of course, none of those other people I had taken out had been Pete. I was still trying to figure him out. He was like a jigsaw puzzle I couldn't figure out, and I had always been good at jigsaw puzzles. I could always figure them out. They were so simple. They were all the same. They never changed. They may look different, but they were always the same.
I knew that I had stopped talking-well thinking-about jigsaw puzzles. I was thinking about people now.
Anyways, I had never tried so hard to make conversation before either. Whenever silence ensued, I would just leave it until something popped into my head or my company said something.
So why was I trying so hard to talk to Pete?
As I floundered about for some topic to talk about, I began to stupidly speak before thinking, something I also never did.
"So... How's the weather?" I asked, then mentally slapped myself. Why did I say that? I sounded like an idiot.
Pete raised an eyebrow.
"I don't know, you tell me." Pete deadpanned.
"Well sor-ry! I was only trying to make conversation." I pouted. Wait, what? Pouted? I never pout. Never.
Pete blinked a few times before laughing softly.
The sound was like nothing I had ever heard. It sounded slightly feminine, but that suited Pete just fine, seeing as he looked sort of feminine himself.
"You're so weird." Pete said, a grin stretching across his face, and it looked like it belonged there.
For some reason, I blushed. I knew I blushed because I felt hot. The feeling was an unfamiliar one. I hadn't blushed since well over 4 years ago.
"So, how old are you?" I asked, willing the blush away and it decided to obey my wishes.
"I'm 24, you?" Pete asked, his grin dying down to slight smile.
"I'm only 21 myself." I answered truthfully.
Pete looked surprised, showing some emotion for the first time I had seen.
"Really? So you're still in college?" Pete asked.
I shook my head.
"I finished two years ago. I took college courses in my last two years of high school." I explained, not knowing why I was telling him this. I had never told anyone this. Maybe because no one cared to ask.
Pete seemed interested enough.
He laughed again and I savored the sound.
"Wow, you're such a nerd!" Pete exclaimed before taking a sip of his coffee.
I gave a little laugh myself.
"Yeah, I guess so." I smiled to myself.
I thought briefly about asking why he was in rehab again but immediately rejected the idea. He would probably become stiff again, and not in that way, no matter how much I wished.
Wait, what? I'll admit it, Pete was hot and all, but I just met him. I don't have sex with people I hardly know, unless I was drunk, and I didn't get drunk too often, a few times a month at most.
"So, do you come here often?" Pete asked with a childish look in his eyes.
I laughed. That sounded like a classic pick up line.
"Yeah, I do. Everyday I come here and order my morning and afternoon coffee. How about you?" I asked.
"Pretty much the same." he answered to my surprise.
"Really?" I asked.
"Yeah." Pete answered, taking a sip of his coffee.
Suddenly, a random question popped into my head.
"Hey, what did you order?" I asked. "Sorry, I was thinking when you ordered."
"That's fine. And I ordered a chocolate cappuccino with extra whipped cream and a caramel drizzle. It's really good." Pete said, taking a sip to accentuate his point.
"It sounds good." I said, taking a sip of my own. It tasted bland in comparison to what Pete just discribed.
"What did you get?" Pete asked. "When you ordered, you just said 'the usual'."
A loud series of beeps came from my pocket. I fished out my cell phone from my jeans and checked the screen. It said 'Sandra'.
I sighed and answered the call, knowing that if I didn't, she would continue to call until I went mad.
"What?" I asked as I flipped my phone open, hearing my own annoyance.
"Patrick!" a shrill voice screamed in my ear, causing me to pull it away from my head and Pete to look at me strangely.
I put it back up to me ear and sighed.
"Yes, Sandra?" I asked.
"Pat-Pat! I miss you!" Sandra said in a less shrill, but still loud, voice.
I sighed, in contentment this time, a little smile playing on my lips.
"I miss you too, Dra-Dra." I whispered, smiling a little more at the old nickname I had given her years back.
"Guess what?" Sandra asked excitedly.
"What?" I asked.
"I'm in Chicago!" she screamed.
"Really? That's great!" I told her.
"Yeah, and I'm coming to see you as soon as I can!" Sasha said in a slightly more normal voice.
"You are?" I asked dumbly, staring at my coffee in shock.
"Yeah!" She was excited, I could tell. "So, you got a boyfriend yet?"
I glanced at Pete quickly and found him staring at me curiously. I turned beet red.
"N-no!" I said a little too quickly.
"Ah! You do! Who's the lucky guy?" she asked conspiratorially.
"I-uh-um…" I was at a loss for words.
Suddenly, there was a lot of commotion at the other end of the line.
"Fine!" I heard Sandra scream. She came back to the phone. "Sorry, Pat-Pat. I have to go. Kenny's being a huge dick!"
I chuckled as I felt my face return to it's natural color.
"That's fine." I said.
"Okay. Bye, Pat-Pat! I love you." Sandra said.
"I love you too, Sandra. Bye." I said quietly before hanging up the phone.
I found Pete staring at me strangely.
"What?" I asked, feeling strangely self-conscious.
Pete seemed to snap out of a trance as he shook his head.
"Nothing." he said, though I felt it was more than just nothing.
The plot thickens! Okay, I know this was really long, but I just couldn't find a place to end it! So, you've gotten a better look at Patrick's confusing mind. Love it? Hate it? I know it doesn't make much sense right now, but it will later, I almost promise! I have a kind of idea of what's going to happen, but other than that, I'm just as clueless as you!
Oh, and what do you think of Sandra? She was kind of a last minute thing, so I have no idea how you'll react to her. Are any of you curious as to how she fits in? Is she a girlfriend? A friend? A best friend? A sister? A cousin? A half-sister? A fiancé? A wife? Don't know? Me either! Well, I'll have to figure it out, cause I know you guys are going to die of curiosity! Thanks for reading! Please review!