"You're really not making things easier." I said to my stomach as I got up from the toilet and wiped my mouth with toilet paper as I groaned. I didn't feel any better physically, much less about the whole situation. Part of me feared I was really going to resent this baby as long as it was growing inside me.
"You know the more you keep throwing up, he's bound to figure it out sometime." Tephira suddenly said as I jumped while looking in the mirror and seeing her reflection. I rolled my eyes at her and washed my mouth.
"Shut up." I mumbled as she smiled. I still couldn't bring myself to tell Bob I was pregnant again, just too much preventing me from doing so. I didn't think he'd be angry, but this Bob I've come to know, he was unpredictable.
"Not feeling any better I see?" she smirked as I shook my head.
"Nope." I agreed as she leaned on the counter.
"Just tell him Tissa." she urged me as I sighed.
"I don't want to." I said childishly as she rolled her eyes.
"You have to! You can't honestly hide it for that much longer, you're bounding start showing soon. Besides, do you honestly think he'll be pissed or something?" she asked.
"I don't know. You know how he is, can never tell what he's feeling inside." I replied as she nodded.
"What's the worst that could happen?" she put in as I curled my lips to one side.
"Hmm...I don't know, maybe he'll say screw it and leave?!" I shouted sarcastically as she scoffed.
"You know that's not true. You don't see the way he's always looking at you. He loves you Tissa. He wouldn't leave you like that." she said softly while I nodded slowly and sighed once more.
"I know. I know he wouldn't, but there's always 'what ifs?' lingering in the air. I know I'm probably being a bitch about this, but I just want to things to be stable and not fall apart again. I just don't want this to strain all we've worked for and still trying to work for." I replied as she nodded.
"And that's understandable, but I think you're being just a little too harsh and doubtful. Just tell him." she reasoned while I looked at the rug on the floor and nodded.
"I always am." she said hugging me as I smiled.
"Yeah, yeah." I mumbled while she squeezed me and pulled back.
"Besides, it's not like you're going to abort it and not tell him." she offered as I looked at her and raised my eyebrows in thought.
"That's not such a bad ide-"
"Tissa!" she shouted as I rolled my eyes and punched her arm.
"Oh come on, you know I would never do that, especially after Asia." I replied as she smiled and laughed.
"Go tell him."
"What’s the worst that I could say?
Things are better if I stay
So long and goodnight
So long and goodnight" was all I heard as Asia was entranced with Helena dancing on TV while she twirled around in the famous black dress. Every time Fuse would play an MCR song, she was right there glued to TV to watch her dad and uncles play.
"Daddy why does Unca' Gee look so sad?" Asia asked while he looked at her before looking at the TV.
"Well baby, that song was meant for Uncle Gerard and Mikey's grandma who passed away." he replied.
"Oh..." she replied softly. "He's not sad anymore is he?" she asked concerned as Bob smiled and picked her up into his arms.
"No he's not sweetie." he assured her as she nodded and smiled while he kissed her head before setting her down again while Harlow came to lay beside her. Little lazy lard he was, I wish he was back to the size he was when we first got him. I smiled for a second while I watched her. For a moment the thought of her being a big sister had made my smile stay on a little longer before it suddenly faded.
By the time Fuse stopped playing all the good videos, Asia was asleep on the floor. It amazed me how kids were comfortable sleeping in the awkwardest places. I scooped her up into my arms and laid her down in her bed and tucking her in. I cracked the door and finished putting away dishes before I felt hands wrap around my waist.
"Hey." Bob whispered as I turned around and half smiled at him.
"Hey." I whispered back.
"You alright? You've been looking kinda down lately." he asked as I shrugged and nodded.
"I'm fine." I replied as he raised an eyebrow and kissed my neck.
"Come on. I think I've been around you enough to know when's something up. So what is it?" he asked once more as I looked at him before looking at his shirt then back at him.
"Let's talk over there." I said getting out of his embrace and going to the living room where he sat down and looked up at me.
"Is everything okay?" he asked with a more serious tone while I clasped my hands together.
"I have to tell you something." I said softly.
"Okay."he nodded while holding his hands out while I bounced on my toes.
"Well...I'm..." I trailed off before sighing and sat on the couch.
"What?" he asked impatiently while I snapped my head up.
"I'm pregnant." I blurted out as he shrugged.
"Oh you're probably just - wait what?" he froze as I stiffened and looked at him while I stared at him.
"Again?" he asked as I glared at him while he stuttered.
"But umm...how?" he asked confused.
"One of the condoms wasn't protected, no pun intended." I mumbled. A minute of silence had passed until he shrugged.
"Oh...well that's awesome." he replied while I raised an eyebrow.
"That's awesome?" I repeated while he sat up straight and held his hands out.
"Well...yeah." he smiled as my inner child (not the other child occupying my stomach) seemed to face palm itself.
"You mean you're happy about this?" I asked confused as he narrowed his eyes.
"Yeah...shouldn't I be?"
"I thought you were going to be mad or something." I replied.
"Why I would be mad?" he asked confused this time while I shrugged.
"You don't seem too happy though." he pointed out as I lifted my gaze to him once more while he stared back.
"Were you hoping I was going to be mad?" he asked leaning on his knees as I ran a hand through my hair.
"You were hoping I was going to be mad!" he shouted while I shushed him.
"Yes there was a part of me that was hoping you were, this is a big deal Bob!" I replied.
"Tissa, it's okay." he assured me as I shook my head.
"It's not okay! Do you think we're really ready to have another kid? What about when Brian calls you and MCR has to go on tour?" I asked distressed while he held his palms open.
"Tissa, I can have the guys find a fill in until I'm able to come back, that wouldn't be a problem." he assured me while I chewed on my lip.
"I don't know if I could do it again." I whispered while he frowned and scooted closer to me.
"It'll be different this time Tissa."
"How?" I asked carefully while he smiled and pulled me into his lap.
"Cause I'll be there." he whispered softly to me while I looked into his eyes.
"Promise?" I whispered back while he kissed me and put a hand on my stomach.
So that's how it started. We were having this baby and that was that.
Days passed and we were able to make it work for all of us. I even broke the news to Asia and she was more then thrilled to be a big sister. We decided to keep this a secret from everyone until I was at least 3 months, for the sake of the band's plans for the new album. I continued to help them with the cover designs and well who knew five guys could be so damn picky.
However, the media was something I was not used to. Now that MCR was getting recognized, cameras were constantly taking pictures of the guys whenever we were in main parts of the city. I knew I wouldn't be to get past this when I saw myself in a Spin magazine. I began to cringe as I could only imagine if they found out I was pregnant.
I still hadn't gotten used to the idea that I was going to be having another kid. Maybe with a little more time I could, but I wasn't counting on it.
"Mommy, I want a baby sister." Asia said while she sat in my lap while I brushed her hair.
"What if it's a boy?" I asked curiously as she upturned her nose.
"Boys have cooties!" she squeaked as I smiled.
"How do you know what cooties are?" I asked with a laugh.
"I dunno." she said holding out her hands while I kissed her cheek. After finishing with her hair, she wanted to be rocked to sleep, something I haven't done in a long time. I guess she wanted to be closer to the baby.
Everyone was content with where we were and I couldn't deny I was too.
But I was unaware of just how quickly, that was about to change...
A/N: For the sake of the story being set back in the TBP era, the 'album' in the story won't necessarily be a reference to Danger Days, just to point that out. Next chapter : things just got more interesting...