FicWad: fresh-picked original and fan fiction

I walked up to the vending machine by the side of the road. I’m not exactly sure how, but last night had left me injured, broke, and worst of all, nude. I walked up to the machine in the middle of nowhere and punched it as hard as I could. I reached through the hole I’d just made and pulled out the first thing I felt. A white B.L.ind. Jumpsuit. I reluctantly threw on the enemy colors and reached back in the hole. I pulled out two ray guns. I reached back in and pulled out several batteries. I walked over to my purple motorcycle. I tucked one ray gun in my pocket and put the other one in the cup holder. I began driving down the road. After a few hours, I noticed a light behind me. I decided to slow down to check it out. A car. I was checking over it when a purple flash flew right past my head. I took off so fast I almost flew off my bike. I kept checking behind my shoulder that I missed something crucial. A rock wall.
I awoke to a familiar voice known to everyone throughout battery city.
“News from Route Guano rock n’ rollers. The killjoys just brought me a ‘special delivery.”
Oh no, no, no. they think I work for B.L.I.
“Now I know you know how to contact me. How should I take care of this creativity killer?”
“Hey Doc, I aint no vulculoid.”
“Well,” he answered with a grin, “how do you expect to explain your possessions?”
“Crazy night, robbed a vending machine.”
“Well, what are ya then?”
“I’m a bit of a killjoy.”
“Well then, I guess you won’t mind answering to Party Poison and Kobra Kid.”
“Not at all, triple D.”
I was lying. I had a bad run in with Party Poison that went…. awkwardly. Dr. Death Defying untied me and took me to a bunk.
“They’ll be here in a few hours”
I lay down and tried to clear my head. Then I drifted to another subject. What happened last night?

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