''I'm going to find him''
''I'm going to look for him'' i said interrupting the awkward silence that filled the hotel room
''The police are already looking''
''Mikes we all want to find him but how are you gonna find out where he is?''
''Please baby have you thought this through?''
These are the responses i got, but it wasn't a question. It was a statement. I wasn't sure who said what but i didn't give in to their pleads. I would find my brother even if it killed me.
''Please Mikey'' Jeff begged (he was our tour manager). We were all huddled in my hotel room as we had been for the last couple of days, comforting each other as the police searched for Gee. We had all been waiting for news on his whereabouts, the last thing we had heard was a backpack had been found over 300 miles away that had some of his stuff in it. I was sure it wasn't his though, first off that was too far away for him to walk in the state he was in when he left (public transport was out of the question). Second, the backpack had blood all over it. It couldn't be true (and i was in denial). The police had started looking in the place it was found which happened to be a deserted rural area. Things were not looking good.
''I have to go'' i said biting my lip, attempting not to cry again ''i feel so useless here and he's out there possibly killing himself or already....'' i trailed off and looked up at their faces.
''Mikey, we love ya man so we're not gonna stop you but please think about this'' Ray was close to tears too. This had been a really emotional week for everyone.
''He's my brother, we think alike, i might be able to find out where he is''
''Please be careful baby'' Alicia pulled me into her arms. My wife was so amazing, she had flown all the way here just to make sure i was okay.
''I will'' i whispered in her ear.
''Mikey'' Lyn-z hugged me as well. ''We will find him'' she choked through sob's. Lyn-z seemed to be more positive than the rest of us through it all... but thats only because she hadn't seen what he'd been like before he left. ignorance is bliss i suppose.
By the time i left we were all reduced too tears. But it was my responsibility to find Gerard. Not because i was his brother but because i had let this go unnoticed. I was guilty for letting him fall back into depression and god knows what else. I had asked but he just pushed me away.
They promised to keep me updated about what the police had found and Frank offered to come with me.
''You don't have to do this alone'' he gave me a sympathetic smile and put his hand on my shoulder. I shook my head sadly, he seemed to understand. It wasn't that i didn't need help, it was more that i needed to be alone for this and i felt as if it was my job to get my brother back where he belonged.
i know its short but i was stuck on what to put next (any suggestions would be great cos i only have a few ideas). Keep it ugly :)
Okay i won't be able to update for a while cos i'm going on holiday (does a little dance) so sorry for the cliffhanger (but don't forget about me)