“Gerard are you okay… you have gone really pale and you look like you’re gonna throw up? Who were you just on your smashed phone with?” I look down at the floor realizing I had dropped my phone letting it fall to the concrete floor below when I heard Eva’s voice.
“my um brother… he’s in trouble, but I can’t tell him he is in trouble cause well he doesn’t know about me” I jump down from the tree landing perfectly next to the pieces of my phone, I shakily pick up the pieces shoving them into the tattered bag the slung from my shoulders, why the fuck is this happening to me? She killed my parents, so I messed with her life, I mean that revenge its even, she got run out of new jersey, her life ruined but not emotionally hurt she would move on but now, now she is making it uneven yet again just to hurt me, just to ruin my life, just for the taste of my family’s pure blood.
“what do you mean trouble? It can’t be that bad!?” frank and Katie both jump from the twisted old willow tree next to me on the concrete path, I look at the beauty of franks face, the pain in his eyes that seems to shimmer so bright, like a birthday badge that lights up for the day, the pain I caused him just for a metallic taste hurts me so much, the confusion, the horror, the self-inflicted wounds, god forgive me frank, I’m so sorry.
August 2nd 2010
Today I fell, I fell into a fence it really it should of killed me, logically I would of bled to death, it cut my arm deeply enough to do some serious damage, where a living person would have bled, except no blood came out the wound, none at all, I expected to look down and I would see was the gleaming red river that stole so many lives, but it was gone, there is no blood pumping through the veins, I tested my pulse. None. Why am I feeling so alive but yet I feel nothing? Is this hell.
hey hey hey, sorry i know i said this would be uplast night but i was painting my little killjoys (see what i did there, my little pony and killjoys ^^ they look pretty cool but i kept putting of writing but i promise i will do more updates now cause ive gotten lazy with them the last few day but! they will be daily from now on :D