The first day at the hospital where Gee meets this one girl... Sorry it's so short and boring, i promise it will get more interesting!
(#) xxXLadyOfSorrowsXxx 2011-05-25 12:41:45 PMaww thanks(: im glad i could help. like i said before, im loving this alot. its beautifully written and not boring. i liked the pedophile thing(: can't wait for more xx
Author's responseI'm glad you like it!:) i kinda had writers block and it's only the second chapter :o
really, thank you so much^-^ i didn't think i could write good, because i'm not writing in my mother tongue so hearing this does mean a lot to me.
i will update as soon as i can, i promise!
(#) TheBambooMuncher 2011-05-26 10:16:28 AMFuck me! You've only been learning English for five years?! I've been learning French for over four years and I couldn't write like this!!!!
It's really well written, and completely original. Well, it's new to me :L
Update soon -End Transmission
Author's responseYep...i actually do almost everything in english in my freetime too, because i just love it so much;) weird i know
i had french in elemantary and i didn't like it...so i never picked it again because i know i'd fail miserably. so don't worry about it^^
people say for germans english is one of the simplest languages to learn. it's way easier than german (we don't even get our own grammer...)
haha thank you:)
will do though it might take me a while, sorry:L
(#) TheBambooMuncher 2011-05-26 12:33:11 PMI don't think that it's weird that you like to do everything in English, it just means that you'll have more than one language to insult people in :L
There are also a lot of people in England that can't write in English half as well as you, you put them to shame :L
And I don't mind if it takes you a while to update, just as long as it's not month XP
i feel really special when i hear that:o some people just have a talent for writing and others don't i guess:L
okay:D nah not a month i'm not that meanxP
- Holy hell you only took english for 5 years and can write more coherent than I can and I learned the language for 22 years. I couldn't even tell that english wasn't your fist language, I thought you were British because of saying post. Can't wait to read the next chapter, but take your time, you can't rush awesomeness!
Author's responsethanks so much! i'll keep on trying my best^-^ oh so there is another word for post :o i just said it cuz in german it's post too therefore i remembered this one:D
okay i'll be working on it...promise!;)
(#) AdnarimSmada 2011-06-09 03:25:49 PMYour English is excellent,I've been taking French for two years and Christ,I couldn't hope to be able to write that well.
I'm enjoying this. It is very original like I said in a previous review. I hope you decide to continue.
As for spelling and grammar,I only noticed two problems.
Admittedly it didn't seem to inviting but I guess for most of the people this was their last hope.
The form of the word "to" used is incorrect here. It should have been spelled too. That's the proper form for the type of description you used in the above sentence.
She was small for her age with sandy blond hair much like Mikeys only hers was tied together in a messy ponytail with a few loose strands falling in her face covering her eyes.
The problem here is that when you show possession an apostrophe is supposed to be added between the person's name and the s.
Those are the only flaws in this chapter. You write very well considering this is your second language.
P.S: If you want me to shut up and stop correcting this stuff,I don't mind,just say the word. :)