Categories > Celebrities > Panic! At The Disco > Life Is Full of False Hopes


by Wicked_Lovely 5 reviews

An empty drawer of knives.

Category: Panic! At The Disco - Rating: R - Genres: Angst,Drama - Warnings: [V] - Published: 2011-05-28 - Updated: 2011-05-28 - 1855 words

Sometime after nibbling on a little bit of the food Spencer had put by me, I fell asleep. And not to long after that I was awoken by the sound of the dog barking something hitting the ground and . I hated being awake, it felt like my blood was boiling and my organs were melting. But I got up anyway. I dragged my body up, holding my head in my hands for a few moments. My throat was sore from crying, and my sight was slightly blurred. I sighed, standing up on my shaky legs as I used all my energy to find the source of the sound.
I walked close to the wall, one hand against it to steady myself as I moved slowly down the hall. I turned till I could see a sliver of the kitchen and held still as I took in the scene.
The boy was sitting there, his back to me as he picked up a pile of knives off the ground, the drawer across the floor. The small dog was barking and wagging his tail happily, his front paws on one of the boys kneeling legs. His hands seemed to be slightly cut up and were bleeding lightly, his light brown hair messy and tangled like he had just woken up. I moved into the room slowly, trying not to fall over. I sat down next to him, helping him pick up the sharp knives without a word.
I could feel is stare on me, and I could see that his hands had stopped moving as he stared at me. I smiled a little.
"I'm sure if you took a picture it would last longer." I said with a smirk, not glancing at him as I continued to try not to cut myself on the knives. He sat there quietly and I finally turned to him. "Is there something on my face?" I asked with a straight face. He shook his head a small smile forming on his lips.
"Why are you helping me? Or even better yet, why are you shirtless?" He asked as he stood, putting some of the knives on the counter.
"Well, I was just thinking that I would air out a little. You know, and show off my amazing body. Flex my muscles." I said in a Jersey accent making him laugh a little. I smiled at him, his laugh was like an angles.
"You look like you're burning." He said looking my body over. I shrugged.
"I am. It's fuckin' hot in here." I said with a slight frown. He shook his head.
"Not really." I stood, walking over to him to him to put the knives I had picked up where he had put the ones he had picked up. Of course, with my luck, it was impossible to do that with other sharp pieces of metal littering the cold linoleum floor of the small kitchen. I stepped on one of the knives, feeling it dig into the heel of my foot and slicing it. I screamed, falling to the floor and dropping every knife I was holding. I could feel that I had fallen onto more of them, feeling them scrape my back.
"Well now it's fucking cold." I laughed as I stayed on the cool floor.
"Shit." He said as he ran over to me, avoiding all of the blades. I didn't know how much I was bleeding, but I was already weak and tired as it was and really just wanted to sleep, but I didn't want to sleep when I was with him. He put the back of his hand on my forehead. "Shit." He muttered again and piked me up, carrying my light frame into the living room where he placed me on the floor. I'm guessing so I didn't stain the couch with the blood that was dripping from my back and foot. He ran off and came back with an electric thermometer. "Put this in your mouth." He said and I laughed a little.
"That's what he said." He shook his head.
"Just do it." I nodded, taking the thermometer into my mouth and making sure the tip was under my tongue. While I was sitting there waiting to get my temperature Ryan bandaged some of my wounds. The weird part being that the knife wound I had opened up again and now I was bleeding from my stomach on top of my back and foot. When he finished he took the thermometer, taking a short glance at it. "Fucccccccck." He gave a defeated sigh.
"You sound really sexy when you say that." I said as I closed my eyes a small smile on my face.
"Shut up." He picked me up again, carrying me into the washroom where he put me down in the bathtub. "This will probably hurt your wounds. But I think you should be fine." I smirked at that, giving a small laugh.
"I'm always fine." He gave a small laugh and turned on the water. "Oh shit! Cold, cold, cold! That's really cold!" I thrashed in the water trying to get out but he held me down.
"Stay. You have a high fever and you're staying in the cold water until an ambulance shows up." I wondered when he called for an ambulance, but decided not to worry about it.
"Wanna here a story while we wait?" I asked and I looked at him. His arms were crossed and relaxing on the edge of the tub, his head resting on them.
"Sure." He said giving a small smile. I smiled, deciding to quote a movie it seemed that no one had ever heard of. I gave it a posh and girly accent and started to go on about it.
"I guess I should tell you about the first time I had my period." He laughed a little, and I continued to talk like a girl. "My daddy was driving me back from summer camp, and I turned to him and said, "Daddy, I think I'm sloughing!" And he said, "That's nice hunny."" I paused for a second, doing hand motions that seemed to make him laugh while I talked. "And I realized, that he had like, no idea, what sloughing meant! So I explained to him, that it meant blood was gushing from my you know where! And he nearly wrecked the car, trying to hand me a wad of fast food napkins, which is not something you'd want to particularly stick up your hooch!" He shook his head, laughing like crazy.
"Okay, okay, no more." He said with a smile. It was silent for a minute, both of us content with smiling at each other.
"You know, you're really pretty." He laughed.
"You're a funny kid, but that seems like a harsh joke." He said his smile slowly starting to fade as tears formed in his eyes. I gave him a serious look, moving quickly so I was right across from him, our faces mere inches apart. The water sloshed with my sudden movements, making it spill a little over the edge. I knew I wasn't in my right mind, that between the fever, lack of sleep, and eminence pain I was being myself instead of trying to cover myself up, but I didn't really care. I felt safe with him. And at the same time, I felt nervous as a realization hit me.
"What were you doing in the knife drawer anyway?" He looked at his hands, letting one of them go near the water, one of his fingers lazily making circles in it.
"No reason." He said quietly with a shaky breath.
"Come on, you can see all of my cuts and scars."
"I thought you were just accident prone." I laughed a little at that, and he smiled, still lazily making circles in the water.
"While that dose count for some of them, it's not all there is to it." I said and he sighed a little.
"I don't think I can explain this to you." He said and I frowned.
"You're talking to the kid that hasn't had a friend since the second grade." I said with a laugh. He stayed quite. "You know you can tell me anything, it's not like I have anyone else to tell."
"I was just looking for a knife to cut some food for Hobo." He said looking at the circles that he made in the water. I didn't believe him, but decided that it wasn't worth pressuring an answer out of him. "Who was you're friend?" He asked trying to get the topic off of him. I leaned back against the wall closing my eyes as I immersed myself into the memory of my only real friend.
"She was the only friend I had, only had her for a week until I never saw her again. I remember it well though, the day I met her. At my elementary school, well at all my schools, I was an outcast, a loner if you will. And she just happened to be the same. She had overly compulsive disorder. Every time someone sneezed she would yell four words that start with the letter S. When people coughed she had to say five words that started with a C, when a kid started to bleed, all she could say was "Ew, ew, ew."" He laughed a little at that and I smiled, wishing I had something to smoke. "We used to sit out in the field under an old oak tree, staring up at the sky. I loved her honey eyes, they were so pretty." I paused.
"How did you know she was a girl?" I paused. I didn't know if she was a girl or not. Everyone just called her Sun. I opened my eyes sitting up as I thought about it. Was she really a girl? I frowned. I had always just assumed...
There was a knock on the door and he got up, walking to the door frame where he paused for a moment.
"I'm Ryan by the way." He said and I nodded.
"Brendon." With that he walked out of the room and down the stairs to open the door so I could be taken away on a stretcher. When my body was removed from the frigid water I screamed. It was hot, so fucking hot. And sharp. Not like a blade. Just, sharp. It was a painful feeling, and I couldn't help but to start crying.
It hurt.
And I was burning.


So the movie quote, it's from a real movie. It's called Charlie Bartlett. And it's recommended! All though, I kind of ruined one of the best scenes.... Oh well.
Spencer is a good friend. And poor Brendon just has to go through so much. I almost feel like making it easy for him.
WARNING:Inhalers don't come with my stories. You have to provide your own.
I know! I decided to add Hobo because's old school Panic!, so why not? :)
I'm glad you liked it!
-xoxo Pansy.
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