Love is watching, someone die. So who's going to watch you die?
I could feel the tears picking up again as I stared at the dirty white tips of my shoes. I could hear Spencer rustling next to me, moving around in the seat he was resting in. I leaned against the wall, as the nurse came around once more. I could hear everyone else in the room lifting their heads, waiting for the name she would call out She never said my name. Nor Spencer's, or Jon's.
The TV was the main noise in the room, the static of the muted box filled with dancing colors of light letting waves of buzzing come from it. It was slightly louder than the hushed whispers of the nurse giving bad news. The sound of crying came next, and the group of people were lead out of the room. I looked up, daring a glance at Jon. He was watching the group leave, obviously hoping that it didn't happen to us.
I hated being here. I hated not knowing what was going to happen next. I hated the suspense. The atmosphere. The hushed whispers coming from the broken family's that spread across the room. The smell of piss and 409. It was hard to like a place where you only say goodbye. I closed my eyes, trying to calm down my erratic breathing, reminding myself just how much I had taken today. There's just no comfort in a waiting room. Just nervous pacers bracing for bad news.
The past few weeks had been torture. No matter how hard I tried to help you get better, everything just went downhill. There was no helping you, just watching as you got worse and worse. And then in the morning, you never woke up. All that was there was faint breathing, the slightest sign of life I had seen in you in days. I panicked, calling Spencer to help. He was the one to get you to the hospital, forcing us to wait for hours as they tried to help you get better.
A different nurse came in, and she spoke the name that I was dreading to hear. Spencer and Jon both stood, one of them gently placing their hand on my shoulder as we started to walk towards the nurse.
"He'll be fine Brenny." Jon whispered. I knew he was lying. At this point, all it could be was bad news.
The nurse started to speak, and I didn't dare look at him. "We're really sorry, but there's nothing more we can do for him." My breath hitched in my throat and I squeezed my eyes shut as tightly as they would go. I knew it was my fault. I had been drinking when I should have been taking care of you. You were just a train wreck waiting to happen, and I was your broken break.
He lead us down a hall filled with vending machines and year old magazines, leading us to your death bed. My head started to spin as I realized that every memory I had of you depended on a faulty camera in my mind. We made it there and he pushed the curtain out of the way, giving me a clear view of the death like body that was known as you. Your pale skin, the oxygen mask on your face, the IV sticking out of your arm. The worst part made me bite my lip, tearing at the soft flesh, each and every beep on the heart monitor took you just that much farther away from me.
"He only has about an hour before his heart will shut down completely." I closed my eyes, my legs feeling like they would give up on me, the same way your body had given up on you. Spencer went and got me a chair, Jon standing next to me the whole time.
"I'm so sorry Brendon." He whispered as he reached to take one of my hands. Silent tears were rolling down my cheeks, my throat closed up. I sat in the chair Spencer had brought for me, holding onto your hand. I could hear Spencer and Jon talking, but couldn't understand a word of it as their hushed whispers floated in and out of my ears. I couldn't focus on it, the only thing I could think of was what Sarah said.
'Love is watching, someone die.' I broke down into sobs, not being able to control it any longer. I had stood like a statue in the waiting room, but I couldn't do it anymore. It was just too much. I rested my head on your hand, giving broken words to you even while knowing that you weren't going to respond.
"Please don't die. Don't leave me here. I don't want to be alone. Ryan, please come back." I felt a hand on my back, noticing that Jon and Spencer's hushed whispers had stopped. "Please don't go. I don't know how I'll live without you." I was so scared, so terrified of being alone in the world. You were my other half, and I didn't know how I could get along without you. "Please, just wake up." I knew that you were the truth, that I would rather lose, than to have never lain beside at all.
Sarah's words came into my mind once more, making me speechless as I cried even harder. 'Love is watching, someone die. So who's going to watch you die?' I stayed like that for an hour and a half, the minutes inching by as I begged for you to wake up, giving silent prayers to father time.
And the heart monitor stopped. The line went dead, and all I could do was watch as you disappeared.
No one came to save you.
PartyPoison:This story is just, it's evil. I'm putting Brendon through so much torture, and we haven't even gotten to the end yet.
AnotherKnifeInMyHand:Eh, he did end up dying in a hospital, but only after a few weeks for being taken care of by Brendon. Which just makes things worse for him.
RydenBeliever:I hope this chapter was able to answer that question for you. And my guess is that you probably won't need one for the next chapter, but you will definitely need it for the last one. (Because that one will be so freakin' hard for me to write.)
alligatorpie:If it makes you feel any better, I almost cried when I went through checking for errors. And I was the one who wrote it and knew what was coming.
TheAnonymous:It's that good? Didn't mean to kill you, just Ryan.
reinventlove152:Umm...whoops. Our hipster's...well, gone. Anyway, glad you like it.