Amber and Frank will never be the same.
"Frankie, baby!"' I say loudly as I stumble into the kitchen. I wrap my arms around him, he laughs, holding me back, placing his hand on my waist causing my body to tingle.
"Amber, darling," he replies with a big stupid smile.
"I am so drunk... I think…I can see my own nose," I tilt my head back so that I am looking at the ceiling as if this might help me see my nose better.
The sweet sound of Frank’s laughter greets my ears, “You can always see your nose, watch.”
So I jerk my head forwards, letting my blurry gaze fall on Frank whose eyes are crossed in an attempt to see his nose. Frankie is adorable.
"I have a dilemma, Frank," I wine still clinging to him.
"What's that?" he asks, returning his eyes to normal. I wonder if keeping your eyes crossed for too long hurts.
"Okay. Here's the thing."
"Mm-hm," Frank answers placing his forehead on mine.
"I can barely walk. Let alone climb the trash cans tonight."
"So stay at my house. Problem solved."
"What about the devil? I don't want to make her hate me anymore than she already does."
The truth is I don't give a shit if Frank’s girlfriend hates me. I just want him to think I'm a concerned and caring friend even in my completely drunken state.
"It's not possible,” Frank giggles, “She already loathes you."
I snort my cheeks hurting from doing so much smiling, "Okay. Your house it is!"
"Good. C'mon, let's go."
Frank lets go of me and I almost fall, regaining my balance just before I knock into a kitchen counter. Then Frank grabs my hand, shouting a quick goodbye to everyone as we head out the door.
I am my usual obnoxiously loud self as we stumble home. Only this time Frank is just a drunk as I am so he doesn’t shush me until we are standing right in front of his back door.
"C'mon," he whispers in the dark, taking my hand and pulling me up the stairs to his room.
I’m not nervous at all. This feels like old times. I’m honestly not thinking about the fact I have a crush on Frank…it is the farthest thing from my mind. Really all I’m concentrating on is how fun this is…laughing loudly and knocking into things; neither of us having a care in the world. Maybe Frank is thinking something different…I don’t know. When we get up to his room Frank shuts and locks the door before removing his sweater. I follow suit not wanting to seem weird. After our sweaters are discarded we stop completely still and look at each other.
"Please don't hate me for this," he whispers.
All I can do is nod.
It's like we both know exactly what the other is thinking. We hurry toward each other and meet in the middle. Our lips collide and we kiss roughly, just like earlier in the coat closet. There is no one around this time. There is no denial now. It’s just us alone in his bedroom, kissing. Two best friends, kissing like it is completely natural. The only doubt in my mind is the amount of alcohol we’d both consumed but Frank was a little drunk when he pulled me into the closet; I’m positive the alcohol is what is causing this because this kiss isn't like any kiss I’ve had before. This isn't a sweet innocent kissing. This kiss is the kissing of two best friends who just realized they are in love with each other. This is the kissing of two best friends who have years of sexual tension under them and are suddenly motivated by alcohol to fulfill those desires. Frank and I are entering into a very dangerous area.
The alcohol makes my brain fuzzy. I suppose if I was sober I would be pushing him away right now and demand we talk about things. Yet, after filling my body with a foreign substance, the only part of my brain that remains functioning is the animalist part…the part that controls desire. Throwing caution to the wind I stop thinking and just go along with it. As we pull each others shirts off, I kick my shoes off letting my animalist instincts take over.
I suppose this is what I want, even sober I might not have said no, but it would have happened after rational talking. Frank might still try and get in my pants but at least our feelings for each other would be set out in the table.
Frank pushes me back against the mattress, my body bouncing a little bit, our lips parting for a second. Then my best friend crawls on top of me and our rough and hungry kiss continues on. I can feel Frank undoing the hook of my bra and I know now is the last chance I’ll have to stop him; I don’t protest. Frank’s hand trails down my torso, sending an electric shock up my spine. He unbuttons my jeans and pulls them down, my underwear soon following. I can honestly say I have no problem with Frank seeing me naked, because only seconds later I see him naked. He’s absolutely gorgeous.
Once Frank is undressed he sits on the edge of the mattress, pulling something out from under it. A flash of purple fills my vision and I know it’s the tin box that holds his condoms. I have a feeling at this point we’ve both thrown caution to the wind. Neither of us thinks about how this could potentially ruin our friendship. Crawling up behind Frank, I trail my fingers over his new Jack o’ Lantern tattoo, watching as goose bumps crawl across his skin. After a few seconds I get bored and replace my finger with my lips, smiling as Frank takes a sharp breath. Suddenly Frank whips around, wrapping his arms around me, positioning his self between my legs, kissing my neck. I wonder if he knows just how insane he’s driving me.
"Don't tell me you haven't thought about this," Frank whispers as he nibbles on my neck.
"I have. I've thought about it a lot," I answer finding it just a little difficult to breathe.
"Good," he answers.
Then we make contact. My stomach churns and I hold him tightly, my nails digging into the flesh of Frank’s back. In that one swift movement of his body, our friendship is shattered for good.
Frank isn't exactly gentle with me but I can't really say that I mind too much. I’m pretty sure if no alcohol was involved this would have been more romantic and less rough. I could care less, I am enjoying myself. I like the comments Frank whispers in my ears, the startling realization that Frank and I are having sex. If someone had come up to me a year or two ago and said that Frank and I would one day have sex I would have laughed. Now it doesn’t seem to strange; here in his bed, the both of us holding each other, expressing our love for each other in the deepest possible way.
Once we’re done, Frank wraps his arms around my back, holding me tightly to his chest. I hold him back, enjoying the heat resonating off our bodies. I never want to let go, in this moment I feel as if everything is perfect. Life cannot get any better than this. Frank’s lips touch my neck again, making me shiver a little.
“Amber," Frank says softly in my ear.
"Don't say anything," I tell him.
I have no desire to talk about what just happened. For right now I want to pretend that Frank is all mine and we are happy even if it is just for one night…even if in the morning I will have to face reality. I’ve just lost my best friend.
Instead of talking Frank pulls away from me, lying down on his back. Figuring we’d already crossed all the lines we possibly could I move close to him, resting my head on his chest. Frank wraps an arm around me, running his thumb along my cheek before kissing my forehead. I can tell he wants to say something but is refraining.
The two of us continue to hold each other until we are both asleep.
I wake up with the sun shining brightly in my eyes. Sitting up I am momentarily confused. Why am I in Frank’s bed, completely naked? I move my leg back, letting it brush against Frank’s…why is he also naked? As I rub my tired eyes realization floods over me and I sit frozen. Oh, God…what have we done?
"Amber?" I hear Frank say but his voice gives away that he too is panicked. He’s no longer sweet, best friend Frank, he is now I fucked you last night while drunk Frank. There’s no going back.
"Uh... yeah?" I answer not turning to look at him.
"We fucked up, didn’t we?"
"We... beyond fucked up," I answer quickly wiping away a tear.
Frank sighs, “I was afraid of that.”
"I think I should…I need to go home,” I mumble.
I get up out of Frank’s bed, dragging the covers with me. For some reason I’m terrified of Frank seeing me naked. Hiding in the closet I pull my clothes on, locating everything but a shoe. I figure I can live without it. My main goal is to get out of Frank’s house as soon as possible. I can’t even look at him. Once dressed, I avoid looking at Frank who is sitting on his bed with his head in his hands…he looks so broken. I manage to get to the kitchen before Frank’s mother notices me. Shit.
"Hi, Amber. Staying for breakfast?" she asks kindly.
It’s all I can do to not break into tears. I just rush past her towards the door.
“Not today…I can’t!”
Then I pull the back door open roughly and hurry across the Iero’s small back yard. I need to get as far away from him as possible.
Note: Do you hate me for doing this? Haha if so let me know even though it won't change anything. I'm actually pretty proud of this chapter. :)