Categories > TV > Andromeda > The Difference

The Difference I

by Elizabeth_Goode 0 Reviews

Harper angst! This is my first Andromeda fanfiction, and I was inspired to write it due to the way his character is being treated this season. Not that I'm complaining - it leaves an opening for al...

Category: Andromeda - Rating: PG - Genres: Angst - Characters: Seamus Harper - Warnings: [!!] - Published: 2006/06/23 - Updated: 2006/06/23 - 748 words

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Harper stared at Beka as she grimaced at the plate of food he set before her. She poked it with her fork, and then pushed it away. He barely heard her complaining as he took the offending dish away, couldn't even remember exactly what retort he had fired back at her. God, didn't she get it? Could she not see that everyone around her was just as thirsty, tired, and hungry as she was, if not more so? The others didn't have the luxury of the chef giving them the best of what was available. Even part of his own share. He was worried about her. She was looking thin and haggard. There were dark circles under her eyes, and her hair was losing its luster. For that matter, even Rhade and Dylan were looking like hell lately. And Trance - well, she was a shadow of her former self, not only in mind and spirit, but in body as well. If his formerly-purple-slightly-less-golden-of-late pixie lost one more pound, he was convinced she might blow away.

Sighing heavily, Harper took Beka's discarded meal back into the kitchen. If she wasn't going to eat it, he would have it later for himself. After all, there was no sense in wasting food. If he had learned anything from growing up on Earth, it was that it was best to eat when you had the opportunity. Not that he was hungry. Thinking about what had become of his friends - and, of himself - turned his stomach. Hell, looking out the window turned his stomach. It was too much like Earth. Sometimes, he thought that if Rev or even Tyr were here, things might be different. Perhaps Rev would have been able to provide comfort and wisdom. Perhaps Tyr would have been able to rally them to fight for their survival as a team, instead of trying their luck with every man, woman, Nietzschean, and formerly-purple-sort-of-amnesiac girl for themselves.

Harper gave a short chuckle. In a strange kind of way, Tyr had been the cheerleader of the Andromeda's crew. As damned pessimistic and freakin' Nietzschean as Tyr had been, there was no better reason to function through paralyzing fear for a solution to a potentially fatal problem than not wishing to wind up on the bad side of a Nietzschean whose upper arm was as big around as his skinny mudfoot waist.

Now he knew he was losing it. He, Seamus Zelazny Harper, was actually feeling nostalgic for a Magog and a Nietzschean. He suspected that he had been on the edge of losing it when Beka had first taken him on as crew on the Maru. Years of life on Earth had made him cynical, bitter, and unable to trust. Over time, Beka had helped to change that. She had saved his life, and for that he would always be grateful. Three years on Seefra, trying to save Rommie while working for a crazed geneticist had not done anything for his sanity. The only thing that had kept him sane had been his hope that his friends would come for him. Especially that Beka would come for him. She hadn't left him to die on Earth when Bobby would have done just that, and he had held onto his hope that she would save him from Seefra as well.

He sighed heavily, setting the unappetizing dish aside for later consumption. The difference had begun, he was convinced, with Seefra. Before Seefra, Beka had shown concern for him, as a part of her crew. She had laughed at his jokes - well, some of them, anyway. She had been protective of him, and of Trance and even Rev to some degree. Beka used to care what became of him, how he spent his time, what he thought about things. She had been a friend. Now, he understood the difference. She no longer considered him a friend, and that knowledge hurt more than his Magog infestation ever had. It hurt more than losing Rommie, and he hadn't been sure that anything could hurt that much. Dashing a tear from his eyes, he was momentarily amazed that there was enough moisture left in his body after the merciless Seefran suns had done their best to rob him of it to produce even one. He had to go back out there, had to pretend that he was all right with the strangers his friends had become. And, after that, he had a man to see about some water.
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