The roommate that is no more, and approaching Graduation Day.
So, rather than bore you all with excuses you probably don't give a shit about, I've written a nice extra long chapter which is the build up to the next chapter (obviously) which will be the chapter where shit HAPPENS. That might take a couple of weeks to put together, and I'm to going to Spain on the 9th for three nights with my school :)
So, a nice (hopefully) 3075 words for you, and rate and reveiw for me?
AND THANK YOU, THIS NOW HAS OVER 1000 VEIWS!
That same question haunted Frank every day as he woke up with Gerard’s t-shirt looped around his pillow, and his alarm ringing in his ears. It felt strange to Frank that he didn’t have to fight for the bathroom or need any privacy. What was even more remarkable was that only a few weeks ago Frank would have cheerfully killed Gerard for what he had now. But now that he had a peaceful room of his own, he only wanted Gerard to share it with him. But he was gone. Why? It bounced around Frank’s head constantly, creeping into all of his thoughts, and poisoning the memories he had of Gerard. He tried to silence it, but nothing seemed to. He felt like he was dissolving inside. And that same question shook around his brain: why…why…why…why… It was slowly driving him insane.
His heart was still a little cracked in places, but Frank tried to move on. That question might drive him mad for the next several million years, but it didn’t change the fact that Gerard was gone. The spring Gerard had left him in had given way to a hot summer, and Frank sometimes found himself wishing that Gerard had left a note; something for Frank to get a little closure from, or maybe something to cling to. Instead, it was if someone had cut a telephone cord, and the silence between him and Gerard felt like a slap in the face and knife in the stomach. Sometimes it felt huge, and sometimes it felt empty, but Gerard’s disappearance occasionally made Frank grin. It was so bloody Gerard-esque to just drop everything and run away – for fucks sake, how many times had Frank seen Gerard run out of their dorm because of something he felt uncomfortable with? It saddened Frank to know that his question had apparently upset Gerard enough to push him away that much though.
“MISTER IERO, BECAUSE YOU’VE SO CLEARLY BEEN PAYING ATTENTION, KINDLY EXPLAIN BOTH THE ADVANTAGES AND DISADVANTAGES OF GENETICALLY MODIFIED CROPS TO US, PLEASE?”
Shit. That’ll teach him for not paying attention in Bio, Frank thinks to himself. But he’d rather daydream about Gerard and what’s he’s going to do to him when he catches the dark haired boy. For revenge and for…ahem… pleasure. Both are definitely worth spending time on, as opposed to listening to the fucking advantages of GM shit. Then Frank realizes that the teacher (and the class) is still waiting for an answer and he lifts his head off the desk, and stares at her for a minute.
“One advantage is that they’ll grow faster to ram up your ass, the disadvantage being that I have to sit here and listen to your shit.” Frank sniggers inwardly at her shocked expression; every damn teacher at this place is picking on him a lot recently – he’s blaming the stupid amount of time he’s spending on thinking about Gerard – and then ends up wearing this hilariously shocked face at his rude reply, as if they’ve forgotten that a) he doesn’t care and b) is from New freaking Jersey, where no-one’s particularly polite anyway. And it’s not like he was ever nice to teachers in the first place. They’re all just a bunch of stupid tossers; it’s no shit off his arse to be rude to them.
“MISTER IERO, PRINICIPALS OFFICE NOW!”
Figures, Frank thinks, snorting. Frank reckons he’s set a new record for being in the principals office – although the time he was sent in there after bring the chandelier down was the worst; not that Frank can remember that visit very well, he was busy being heartbroken – but it’s not like going to the principals office is anything new, so Frank just shrugs it off, picks up his stuff and walks out of the classroom. He’s grateful to escape not just the boring lesson, but the prickling sensation of being encased that seems to come with being inside for more than two hours now. He shuffles down the corridor, sneaking past the B Block receptionist, because she’ll be the one to call the principal and inform on Frank’s impending arrival, before pushing open the heavy glass doors that lead into the warm pure Californian air.
Once outside, Frank breathes deeps, before beginning to walk. The copse of trees is no longer his favorite place to go; all he can ever see is Gerard slumped against the bottom of the fir Frank used to climb or his face when Frank left him in that tree, or hear Gerard’s voice singing The Misfits through the leaves. Frank smiles fondly at the copse as he walks past it, but he can’t bring himself to step into the cool shade, not wanting to jeopardize the fragile state his heart’s currently in. His feet lead him past the football field and he looks at that with a shudder; not only do the jocks frequent there, but last time he was on that field it was the night before Gerard left and his heart had felt like it had been torn out. Frank refuses to think of the question that had resulted in that horrible night and everything that happened as a consequence. His quiet footsteps ring through his ears as he continues to walk to the very edge of the school grounds – there’s a small wood at the back corner, with an impressive rock formation that has the perfect little cave for Frank to sit in. It’s quiet and no one ever steps foot in the woods, let alone penetrate the tranquil air for long enough to find the cave.
Frank climbs into his rock bolthole and feels the comfortable feeling of security settle around his shoulders like an old worn hoodie. He leans his head against the rock and lets himself, for the first time since Gerard’s left, to really think about his former roommate and the boy he’d unwittingly given his heart to.
The soft smirking mouth that spoke in a husky voice, forming intelligent sentences that left Frank feeling like an idiot with an flush across his skin; especially when that same mouth used it’s superior vocabulary to murmur dirty little sentences into Frank’s ear. Green swirling eyes that screamed Gerard’s emotions, whether they were glinting with malice, melting with tenderness or heated with lust; the eyes that had pulled Frank in from the moment he saw Gerard standing in the bathroom doorway. Skin that was pale, smooth, warm and oh-so-sensitive to Frank’s touch – the shudders and groans that Gerard would give when Frank slid his hands over the pales boy’s stomach made Frank’s stomach twist in pleasure. The curtain of ebony hair that Frank loved to tangle his hands in, that framed Gerard’s face and made him look mysterious. The slight build of Gerard’s frame that meant it was easy for Frank to slide his hands over Gerard’s shoulders and waist. His smugness. His complete arrogance. His snide remarks and the looks that would accompany them. Frank loved it all, and as he pictured Gerard’s face, he felt some of the stitches holding his fractured heart together spilt and fray, but not break. He let a tiny smile touch his lips. He was grateful that his heart no longer felt like a wrecking ball that was trying to smash his way out of his chest. Frank leant his head back and relished in the slight breeze that whispered through the braches and let himself think of Gerard rather than attend afternoon lessons. The afternoon crept by lazily and Frank felt his old pre-Gerard smile contort his features. He knew that it wasn’t quite as bright as the one he’d worn whilst he was with Gerard. The sun began to slide down the sky and another night was beginning to live.
Graduation was creeping closer; there was about a week to go and Frank had decided to accept the fact he wasn’t going to pass his finals. Rich-kid education was above and beyond his level, and none of the exams had made any kind of sense to him. In fact, the classes seemed to rush straight past Frank, like sand slipping through his fingers, and he began to feel out of his depth. Frank realized just how lost he was without Gerard, how completely lost he was, an oddity who was considered stupid and rough in sea of diamonds. Diamond in the rough huh. More like rough amongst the diamonds. The days spun by, blurs of teachers yelling, harsh exams, beautiful sunsets, memories that hugged at stitches, jocks cursing, punches and blinding sunrises.
Frank jerks awake and looks at the calendar he bought to count down the days until he could leave here, leave his memories of Gerard, and go home, to where he belonged. The date was June 9th. Graduation. It was finally here and Frank could finally escape his too sunny prison and return to the safe sagging grey skies of New Jersey and the blankets of heavy rain that would feel like an old hoodie, perfectly fitting, snug around his shoulders. He could leave. He could leave at the goddamned end of today and no one could stop him. He felt freer that he had done since… since he’d been left without a roommate – Frank decided today was the day he moved on from Gerard Way completely – and he couldn’t wait to accept his shitty grades, move back into his bedroom and start a band with the awesome Ray, who he had been missing like an extra limb lately. Frank sank back down onto the pillows and stared out of the west-facing window, and could only picture Gerard standing there that night, after their first kiss. He shot off the bed, and ran full pelt into the bathroom, and slammed and locked the door, the breathlessness of heartbreak quickly robbing him of the ability to move or see straight. Of course today would be the day that he would feel all those memories flooding back into his mind and make the pain as fresh as possible. It’s because today’s the day you leave him behind forever a voice at the back of Frank’s head whispered to him, and Frank knew it was true.
Rather than acknowledge that voice was right, even to himself, Frank instead opted for a shower, and let the hot water soothe his mind and tense muscles and begin to face the day ahead. This may well be the day he’ll be free, but Frank also knows that the jocks will try on last stunt with him, to try and finish their time here with pride intact. Frank mused on whether carrying round the aluminium bat that he took as a trophy from his last run in with Tom Barker and co. would be more of a hindrance than a help. It might act as a reminder to leave him alone, but it could backfire and make them want to extract revenge. Bloody jocks. Why couldn’t they leave him the fuck alone?
The water beings to run cold, and Frank unwillingly steps out of the safe little shower cubicle, warps a towel around his waist like every other day, and steps back through the doorway. Grey jeans, Black Flag t-shirt and a dark blue hoodie quickly replace the towel, and black converse are added to finish the outfit. Eyeliner. Studded belt. Confidence. Well, he left that one in New Jersey. Appearance of confidence. Check.
The gong sounds, and Frank still hates the noise like he did the first time he heard it, but now he knows that after today he’ll never have to hear it again lifts his spirits and he pushes the door open, and makes his way down the corridor he ripped the paneling off only a few moths ago. The common room is mainly empty and the ceiling is still bare - no one ever bother replaced the chandelier with anything else after Frank’s little… tantrum, and no one’s looked Frank in the eye since that day. He doesn’t care. It’s not like he ever wanted to associate with any of the assholes here anyway and now he was going to be free, freer than a bird and all he felt like doing was standing on the highest point on campus and singing his heart out. He was out of this luxurious, asshole filled hell hole as of today, motherfuckers and everything was going to be fine and nothing was going to go wrong, Frank was sure.
The Room Where They Ate was empty at this time, everyone still probably preening their perfect little selves into the height of fashion and sluttery because of the glorious day that meant he was out of here. He realized he might be a little over the top about leaving, but after the year he’s been subjected to at this place he felt it was completely understandable. Oatmeal, bears, snide remarks, baseball bats, punches, broken hearts and the boy with the bright green eyes have shaped his time here, and most of it has sucked. He absently mindedly scooped up some toast and grabbed himself a cup of coffee, knocking the coffee back as soon as he sat at ‘his’ table – the table with the red sharpie – and wolfing down the toast dry, as if doing everything faster would make the time pass that little bit quicker. All it meant though, was that Frank was back in Room 13 before he knew it, and having to struggle with his suitcase.
He’d managed to fix his beloved Pansy, but she wasn’t the same anymore; all Frank could see were the scars inflicted upon her by Gerard, and in turn, could only see the glittering green eyes that had awaited him after he saw Pansy battered for the first time. And the kiss that had followed the punch. Frank only played Pansy when he was restless to play, and it always depressed him when he did. So she was already locked in her case and ready to leave, unlike the rest of Frank’s possessions. Shoes, jean, t-shirts, hoodies, books, and belts all had to methodically shoved into the case he’d brought with him, and all his stuff seemed to be defying him, even when he was using his ‘gift’.
After two hours of clothes stuffing, mental prodding and practically jumping down on the suitcase to get it to shut, he case was finally locked and standing upright, and the ugly red graduation robe was the only thing that was out of the suitcase besides his rucksack, which had everything he would need on a flight. He hadn’t booked one yet, but he just planned on turning up at the airport and waiting for the next plane to New York or New Jersey, however long it took.
Despite the promise he’d made to himself earlier about forgetting Gerard, Frank found himself stowing Gerard’s t-shirt in a plastic bag and placing it in his suitcase with everything else.
Frank heard a very nervous knock on the door and someone young sounding stammered out that the Graduation Ceremony was due to start in ten minutes, and that he was required out in the courtyard. Frank called back a polite affirmative before taking one last, long look around the off white room where he’d met – and lost – Gerard, and all the memories that had tainted the bland walls. He wondered who’d get Room 13 next year, and whether they’d enjoy it here more than he ever had. But, he supposed, it was to do with mindset. He’d never waned to be here, and no doubt some enthusiastic 14 year old would adore this room, along with the rest of campus. Frank sighed and walked to the door, and placed his hand on it, ready to leave this room for the last time. It felt strangely therapeutic to walk through it and know he never had to come back.
Out in the courtyard, the sun was glaring down and Frank saw the principal roll his eyes over the fact that Frank was fifteen minutes late – the ceremony was due to start in five minutes – and so Frank simply waved, and walked to his allocated spot that was angrily gestured at him. He slid on the polyester red robe, felt awkward at being in an almost dress and began to scan the crowd to make sure no jocks were near him. Once satisfied that no one was going to kill him, he turned to face the front, and watched as parents began to fill the seats in front of the nearly graduates. Frank thought he saw one face that was vaguely familiar; it was an older man, but Frank knew he’s seen that face before, but couldn’t place it. He shrugged it off and decided that they probably had a strong resemblance their snobby offspring.
The principal began to call out names in a dead, monotone voice that Frank barely registered when “IERO” was called, and each student shuffled forwards, and collected their congratulations. Frank had almost drifted to sleep when he distinctly heard “WAY” being called, and by jerking upright and straining is neck, could plainly see Gerard walking forward so gracefully towards the principal. Frank’s stomach dropped at the sight of those strong shoulders and narrow waist and only felt a little sorry for himself that he couldn’t see the dazzling eyes that were his favourite feature of Gerard’s. The principal shook Gerard’s hand, ebony hair gleaming slightly in the bright sun and Frank felt his insides clench in excitement, fear and the distant memory of loving. Hadn’t he day dreamed for months what he was going to do to Gerard when he caught up with him, and here the boy himself was, looking irritatingly handsome.
The rest of the actual ceremony shot past in a blur; all Frank remembered was a loud cheer, snippets of the principal’s speech, and Gerard a little way away from him, constantly staring forward as if the secrets of the universe were being spoken to him by the principal himself.
Then, everyone had broken off into little groups, parents and offspring chatting to one another, waiters wondering around with champagne flutes and canapés, and the teachers were talking with the exceptional students, and Frank was being avoided like the plague until he felt someone grab his arm.
Yes, I cut it there, it means it's nice and easy for me to keep writing this. Also, MWA HA HA. Also, again, my finger's better, and my friend thought it would be funny to shove me and I've taken several skin layers off of my knee because I fell over. He got a kick in the dick ^.^ No idea why I told you that. But the look on his face was hilarious. It could only be described as "contorted in agony".
I'm very excited about the next chapter; the storyline becomes a bit more evident and we (I mean you lovely people reading this) find out... quite a bit about Gerard and his odd little bi-polar ways. Hee hee. So, yes.
RATE AND REVEIW PLEASE.
They make me happy :D
P.S Please read the prologue to something else I'm planning to write and lettting me know what you think? It's a high school shooting fic, so... yeah. I'm a little twisted. Bite me.
P.P.S Also, if you read Panic! At The Disco fic, go and read my friend GelachGirl's story. It's good. Seriously. http://ficwad.com/story/181596
Shameless promoter :3
UNTIL NEXT TIME ^.^