Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > Winter Rose
I'm NOT going to update if I SEE NO COMMENTS
Love ya~~~~
-Frank's POV-
"Everything just fucking right." Satisfied, I follow it up with a sneeze. I've set up the telephone; buy myself a useful cell-phone and all those things. Some days ago I thought I'll be living forever alone, need none of these called phones but of course I knew I was wrong with him around me, it would be a waste if I decide to live alone.
The clock said its time to pick him up. Surprisingly, I didn't mind to do it, I usually am too lazy to even get my ass going somewhere. But he was specially, he was one and the only human that got my heart and take it with him from the first time I saw him. Nevertheless, he's sweet and childish personality was just candies from heavenly-piñata. I don't even know what I shall say about him, about us, about how special he was to me. I love him, addicted to him, obsessed, I don't know what to say, I want him to be mine, yes MINE because he already made me his, I am his… bad creature Gerard… bad human… really bad love I had.
I quickly drove to the place we both promised to meet before, nearby your house. Found you there, staring at someone's or maybe your own house, touching the fences then looked away, dragging your awfully huge luggage to my direction.
Gerard changed his clothes and I couldn't help my eyes for not checking him out from toe to head, he was fucking sexy! I liked how those black jeans cloth clinging into his skinny long legs, perfectly wrapped them with warm, a black t-shirt which wrapped his skinny body like second-skin covered with a pippin' hot fucking sexy black leather jacket that somehow glow perfectly with the sun as the background, making me stare in disbelieve that he was a human. He got a black backpack from his back and take out an ear-muffler and a pair of knitted gloves, putting it on his fluffy red hair, making the beautiful rose looks even more sweet and I could guess it was freezing out there, I hope he won't break any finger, thank God my car's warmer is the best. He seemed to be panting or just breathing with mouth open, his breathe goes white and once in some 30second he'd pull his left arm into a fist, and cover his delicious-dry lips, coughing hard.
Being awkwardly upset at myself, I somehow could feel the pain in my throat, the image of him being sick haunts me and I feel like shoving that image out of my sight, but I couldn't, because he's real. I drove toward him, stopped right beside the sidewalk, tilting my head, gesturing him to come and get in the car, he needs the warmth. Gerard tilted his head, blinks on me twice and goofily smiled as soon as he realizes what I was trying to say. I couldn't help but sigh; his smile got distracted by the annoying cough. Feeling so hopeless about him, I got down from the car, took the luggage away from his long fingers and put it carefully into the trunk, I could slightly feel his cold breathe on my face, at that very second, I felt choked by regrets.
He didn't seem to notice my behavior-change which means good for me. Gerard sat himself on the passenger seat next to me, buckle in the seatbelt and sigh in relieve, happy with the warmth in my car. "You looked pale," I tried to open up a conversation, looking at him even though I couldn't get myself to look at his dazzling hazel eyes. He must be ill from sleeping on the snow yesterday, really careless Gerard.
Gerard looks back into me as I started the car, "Me?" I could see a slight smirk form on his smile. He coughed, turned the smirk into a childish grin, trying too hard to hold back the cough and hide it inside his throat, I could show how the fail disappoint but of us successfully, "I'm feeling fucking great!"
Graven by the fire from worry, I drove my car as fast as it was to be practical by me, being as crazy as a shit but I couldn't even get myself to actually drink up my sanity, the urge of pain was too much. I didn't even breathe properly as I drove to my home and I could caught Gerard's shocking expression by edge of my right eyes, the snow was falling out there and I could swear I thought he was a rose, once again.
"What the fuck?" he cursed as I hit the break literally with all my force, stopping right in front of my house. I was driving twice faster than I could ever imagine. Gerard laughed hysterically, still trying to hide the painful cough he had. His laughing was like a burning cooper on my spine, melting all my bone, pressing through my organs till it burn to ashes, boiling the blood before letting it evaporate, too painfully loved to even heard. "That was…" he talked between the cough, I couldn't really puzzle out what he was trying to say to me.
"Oh, shut the fuck up, Gee…" I don't want to hear you coughing like that, I'm hurting here, I thought but didn't say, wouldn't want to made him creep out by my already cold intonation. I slam my car-door as I got down from it, taking out his luggage from the trunk and drag it to the front door, in a fucking cold gesture. I just want to shut his mouth with mine so he wouldn't try so hard to produce an angelic-voice that mixed with the burning hell of cough that wouldn't stop grabbing on my earlobe, repeating how it sounded like in my rotten brain. Thinking about it made my feelings grow worsens, like a drop of rain water, cling by the edge of a leaf, uncertain to fall or raise.
Gerard rushed out of my car with the ember of anger burning inside his greenish-hazel pupils. Oh so lovely. If he wasn't so angry at me and I wasn't so rude at him, I'd him and put him on my bed, then sing him till he close his eyes peacefully like he did yesterday. He pulled my wrist and looked at me in the eyes, hopefully he wouldn't notice my cheeks that heated slightly as I couldn't stand the embarrassing moment of staring at each other eyes, "Frankie…" it's not like that I hated it, it just flatter me and made my whole body goes jelly.
I put his luggage in front of the door without any single sound. Instead of smiling and say nice things to him, I rolled my eyes and say, "What?" in a quiet loud voice. I looked away; avoiding his confused and innocent stare and pull my hand from his rather weak arms.
Annoyed, he looked at another way and pouted, sulking like a child, innocently cure.
I sighed, if he talks with me I'll go softer than this, I promised myself and enter my house quietly. I grab his wrist gently and lead him to the master-room, located in the end of the corridor of the second-floor; I gave this room to him instead of the guess-room he was using yesterday. In the way to the room, Gerard tried to say something but end up refusing it after he realize that the coughing fuck his throat.
As we enter the carpeted room, I lead him to the king-sized bed and let him sit there. "Here…" I said softly, dropping his luggage in front of the bed and kneeled down, taking off his shoes carefully like what I did to all my previous lover. I couldn't get even more cold or angry or upset at him; he was just a weak kid, despite of his age. "Wanna change to Pj's?"
He tried to talk as an answer, but the violent coughs rip off his will to try to produce his angelic voice, well I wish he wasn't trying so hard, he couldn't even breathe properly! He grabbed my hand as he lay down and roll on the bed, still coughing and pull me till I have to stand up to see him, he looked at me and nod weakly. Hopelessly I loosen his weak hands, drag his luggage into the wardrobe which was almost full with my clothes and unpack for him, taking out a matching pajama and put it besides him. Without a word I looked away, facing my back to his face and keep myself busy by turning on the fire-pit in front of the bed, trying to fix my mind to the flame-making so I don't have to follow my desire to take a peek.
Not long after I manage to turn on the flame, his cough had develop a new way to torture the-love-at-the-first-sight of mine which made my heart sinks into a new kind of pain either, "I'll see if there's a med for you…" I said in a quiet pathetic intonation, hopefully he wouldn't notice it. I seriously having a hate-love relationship with his cough, I meant that cough made me all worry about Gee, other word, keep me close with him and keep my mind 100% filled with his pictures, what a great relationship we both had. But Gerard, dear God, which heavenly hell or sinful heaven you made him from? How a man could look so pretty when being in such pain like that?
I rushed down as fast as I could, trying to distract my brain from the cough by focusing on where I located my medicine-cupboard. I found it and opening it not-so-carefully, browsing through all brand and name that the bottle had and found a new bottle of cough syrup and a strip of fever-pills. I grab some random bottled water from my kitchen and rushed back upstairs. I found Gerard forming a ball while snuggling inside my thick blanket, he had taken off his ear muffler but not the glove yet, he was also shivering a little.
I carefully lift him up and grab some pillow and put it between the hard bed-head and his back, to make him comfortable. I carefully pour the cough syrup into the measuring-spoon and put it into his mouth carefully. He was panting so hard and tries not to cough as he open his mouth slightly to dissolve the cough syrup. He also put lots of effort to gulp down the tiny white fever-pills, trying not to be interrupted by the cough.
"You want something else?" I asked him as gentle as I could. I was hell-worth worried of him.
Gerard looked at me with his weak yet innocent gaze; I wanted to hug him right there at that time without caring how he would react to it. He grabbed my hand and pulls me close; making my chin crashed his shoulder and rest there. He got me weak, I couldn't even find a guts to pull my face away, I just hope he wouldn't hear my heartbeat, I could make sure that he wouldn't notice my heating skins as his was hotter than mine.
"Gee?" I called out, half-choked. I was so fucking nervous, there was no one in the world could made me as weak and as chicken and as soft as ice cream like Gerard ever made me. I was such a hopeless man in front of him, and what worst? He got my whole heart in less than 24 hours.
He pulled my arm closer, putting it nears his chest and rests his head on mine I could feel his heart pounding my arm, so fast… "I want you…" the velocity was so unbearably fast, as fast as mine or maybe faster, or mine was the faster one? Oh holy shit wouldn't care. I could imagine how our hearts run into each other, crashing violently with a kiss in an embracement; our artery cling into each other and our vena hugs each other, sucking the blood of escaping love that wanted to be release, untamed feelings.
I gulped down my dried saliva, basically there was none I could gulp, I looked at him who had eyes fixed to mine, his bright greenish-hazel orbs were showing me a honesty and a little plead. I could hear his weak breathing like if his blood, his lungs, and of course the carbon dioxide was playing an orchestra of a ballad in my brain, what a shit man I am. "I… I'll stay…." I slip out an answer after the nerve cracking stare he gave me for about 5 seconds. It wasn't long, of course I knew it wasn't, but everything he did to me made me so nervous, I could feel the sweats were forming on my neck, even though I haven't sweat yet. I felt so nervous, like almost losing my virginity again.
He smiled slightly, letting go of my arms and slide down to the mattress. "Am… going to change…" I said as he nodded slightly.
I was half-running to my wardrobe, closing the door soundlessly and breathe harshly. WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT? I could feel, very clearly that I was getting a hard on, and it was going to be so fucking obvious if I just stay and stare and fuck… he was such a fucking tease fucking jerk fucking retard jerk and… fucking fuckable angel.
It took me 10 minutes to actually calmed down from my own struggling, got my body heat into normal again and change my clothes into a plain gray pajamas without having dirty thoughts around, from the innocent try to stare into his blinding pupil till the imagination of squeezing his round ass while marking his sexy back, I'll be a fucked up fool if I never wanted it but… he was still an innocent kid, if I say, 'Hey, want to fuck?' he might just stare and blink and understand none of it and even WORST, he might has a thought that I was the MOST DISGUSTING dude he would ever met! NOOOOOOOOOOOOO! I don't want to go to hell yet.
I have to inhale and exhale for about 5 times before actually open the door and meet him. I'm not going to fuck him, I tried to convince myself. Gladly, when I open the door, I found him lying on the bed, with hands hugging my pillow, sleeping like an angel. It reminds me of when he slept on the snow, my beautiful winter rose.
I climbed onto my bed carefully; trying not to make any single creaking sound or even a thud, don't want to bother Gerard's beauty sleep. I laid myself besides him, laid my head on my arms and watches on his back and his soft hair, I realize that I smiled. I wasn't close enough to him to hear his heart beat or feel his hair on my face, but close enough to be able to smell his sweet fresh scent and listen to how soft he breathe, like my favorite music that would never be forgotten in my brain, but sometimes a cough of sharp dagger stabs me on the heart, disturbing the beautiful sounds I enjoy.
This was the first time I've ever feel so much pain from watching someone being sick, especially the one that not even my lover, and more awesomely, we have just met in more or less 24 hours ago. Never been anyone in my life, my past lovers or my father (except my mother) made my throat breaking on its own and making the bones sting into my skin, with the bloods helping to paint the beautiful pain. The more pain you gave me, the more beautiful my feelings become, you made me worried, my love.
A few hours had past and I realize that I fell asleep when I had me awake from Gerard's painful cough. I sat up all the sudden, didn't mind my aching head and woke him up from his own sleep. He was coughing so badly with his body shivering, I was sure that the room was warm.
"Let's go to a doctor…" I said worriedly, holding his both hands tight so he would snap out to the reality.
His painful expression changed to sadness, "N-no… Frank…" he pushed me weakly and pull the blanket from me, wrapping his whole shivering body, his legs on his chest and I could make sure that he was squeezing them so tightly.
I massaged my temple, confused. "But Gerard… you have to…" I could hear my own voice became so matured, demanding but gentle. Or whatever, all I got in brain was how to get this childish man to get to the doctor and got a proper treatment or whatsoever.
He created a perfect pout with his lips, staring at me with startling orbs; he sure knew how to use his cuteness to melt people's heart. He made me want to gulp down all my feelings and emotions, the excitement, misery, hollows and lovely feelings he gave me could just rape me hard right there at that time, I was so beaten up.
He didn't say a word but I knew he was against my decision. I put my palm on his forehead trying to guess how hot he was (well, he is HOT), "You are hot; Gerard… and you've been coughing real hard. It would be a lie if you told me that you're okay. So, let's go to a doctor to make sure of it…" I tried to persuade him as soft and as gentle as I could ever be, I realize that I treat him so carefully like treating a child, but it was true, deep inside he was still a little boy, hiding from what he was scared and challenging everything he never see.
"But…" coughed, "But…" another cough, "I've been in there…" he sobbed, followed by more painful cough and a hiccup.
"Okay… okay… I get it…" I whimper, not able to resist any more pain he produce from that must be hurting throat. I knew even if I keep trying to persuade him and stand on my own decision I'd let him win, so the earlier it is, the best for him. "If you're not getting any better by tomorrow…" I tried to look into his eyes but fail, I looked at his arms instead, and continue, "I'll drag you to the doctor no matter what you say…" I rub away his tears and his watery eyes were drying away gradually. His greenish-hazel pupils show me the most innocent happiness that I have ever seen in this world, it flatters me.
"But I don't want…." He wrapped his hands around my neck, making me fall into his hug.
My heart was beating my chest painfully and I could swear it was going to break my limbs if I didn't do anything about it. But I was being careless; I hold Gerard tight and let his head rest on my shoulder. "Then you should get better real quick…" I patted his back-head softly wondering if he might able to hear my mad heart that was so going to beat the shit out of my limbs and flesh.
He was inhaling on my shoulder, on my pajama, on my NECK! He was SMELLING ON ME!!!! "You smell nice Frank~" he said randomly as he flop back to the mattress, lying on his pillow. His eyes looks drowsy, "I really like it~" he smiled and pass out, sleeping deeply already.
"Yes, I like it too."
Love ya~~~~
-Frank's POV-
"Everything just fucking right." Satisfied, I follow it up with a sneeze. I've set up the telephone; buy myself a useful cell-phone and all those things. Some days ago I thought I'll be living forever alone, need none of these called phones but of course I knew I was wrong with him around me, it would be a waste if I decide to live alone.
The clock said its time to pick him up. Surprisingly, I didn't mind to do it, I usually am too lazy to even get my ass going somewhere. But he was specially, he was one and the only human that got my heart and take it with him from the first time I saw him. Nevertheless, he's sweet and childish personality was just candies from heavenly-piñata. I don't even know what I shall say about him, about us, about how special he was to me. I love him, addicted to him, obsessed, I don't know what to say, I want him to be mine, yes MINE because he already made me his, I am his… bad creature Gerard… bad human… really bad love I had.
I quickly drove to the place we both promised to meet before, nearby your house. Found you there, staring at someone's or maybe your own house, touching the fences then looked away, dragging your awfully huge luggage to my direction.
Gerard changed his clothes and I couldn't help my eyes for not checking him out from toe to head, he was fucking sexy! I liked how those black jeans cloth clinging into his skinny long legs, perfectly wrapped them with warm, a black t-shirt which wrapped his skinny body like second-skin covered with a pippin' hot fucking sexy black leather jacket that somehow glow perfectly with the sun as the background, making me stare in disbelieve that he was a human. He got a black backpack from his back and take out an ear-muffler and a pair of knitted gloves, putting it on his fluffy red hair, making the beautiful rose looks even more sweet and I could guess it was freezing out there, I hope he won't break any finger, thank God my car's warmer is the best. He seemed to be panting or just breathing with mouth open, his breathe goes white and once in some 30second he'd pull his left arm into a fist, and cover his delicious-dry lips, coughing hard.
Being awkwardly upset at myself, I somehow could feel the pain in my throat, the image of him being sick haunts me and I feel like shoving that image out of my sight, but I couldn't, because he's real. I drove toward him, stopped right beside the sidewalk, tilting my head, gesturing him to come and get in the car, he needs the warmth. Gerard tilted his head, blinks on me twice and goofily smiled as soon as he realizes what I was trying to say. I couldn't help but sigh; his smile got distracted by the annoying cough. Feeling so hopeless about him, I got down from the car, took the luggage away from his long fingers and put it carefully into the trunk, I could slightly feel his cold breathe on my face, at that very second, I felt choked by regrets.
He didn't seem to notice my behavior-change which means good for me. Gerard sat himself on the passenger seat next to me, buckle in the seatbelt and sigh in relieve, happy with the warmth in my car. "You looked pale," I tried to open up a conversation, looking at him even though I couldn't get myself to look at his dazzling hazel eyes. He must be ill from sleeping on the snow yesterday, really careless Gerard.
Gerard looks back into me as I started the car, "Me?" I could see a slight smirk form on his smile. He coughed, turned the smirk into a childish grin, trying too hard to hold back the cough and hide it inside his throat, I could show how the fail disappoint but of us successfully, "I'm feeling fucking great!"
Graven by the fire from worry, I drove my car as fast as it was to be practical by me, being as crazy as a shit but I couldn't even get myself to actually drink up my sanity, the urge of pain was too much. I didn't even breathe properly as I drove to my home and I could caught Gerard's shocking expression by edge of my right eyes, the snow was falling out there and I could swear I thought he was a rose, once again.
"What the fuck?" he cursed as I hit the break literally with all my force, stopping right in front of my house. I was driving twice faster than I could ever imagine. Gerard laughed hysterically, still trying to hide the painful cough he had. His laughing was like a burning cooper on my spine, melting all my bone, pressing through my organs till it burn to ashes, boiling the blood before letting it evaporate, too painfully loved to even heard. "That was…" he talked between the cough, I couldn't really puzzle out what he was trying to say to me.
"Oh, shut the fuck up, Gee…" I don't want to hear you coughing like that, I'm hurting here, I thought but didn't say, wouldn't want to made him creep out by my already cold intonation. I slam my car-door as I got down from it, taking out his luggage from the trunk and drag it to the front door, in a fucking cold gesture. I just want to shut his mouth with mine so he wouldn't try so hard to produce an angelic-voice that mixed with the burning hell of cough that wouldn't stop grabbing on my earlobe, repeating how it sounded like in my rotten brain. Thinking about it made my feelings grow worsens, like a drop of rain water, cling by the edge of a leaf, uncertain to fall or raise.
Gerard rushed out of my car with the ember of anger burning inside his greenish-hazel pupils. Oh so lovely. If he wasn't so angry at me and I wasn't so rude at him, I'd him and put him on my bed, then sing him till he close his eyes peacefully like he did yesterday. He pulled my wrist and looked at me in the eyes, hopefully he wouldn't notice my cheeks that heated slightly as I couldn't stand the embarrassing moment of staring at each other eyes, "Frankie…" it's not like that I hated it, it just flatter me and made my whole body goes jelly.
I put his luggage in front of the door without any single sound. Instead of smiling and say nice things to him, I rolled my eyes and say, "What?" in a quiet loud voice. I looked away; avoiding his confused and innocent stare and pull my hand from his rather weak arms.
Annoyed, he looked at another way and pouted, sulking like a child, innocently cure.
I sighed, if he talks with me I'll go softer than this, I promised myself and enter my house quietly. I grab his wrist gently and lead him to the master-room, located in the end of the corridor of the second-floor; I gave this room to him instead of the guess-room he was using yesterday. In the way to the room, Gerard tried to say something but end up refusing it after he realize that the coughing fuck his throat.
As we enter the carpeted room, I lead him to the king-sized bed and let him sit there. "Here…" I said softly, dropping his luggage in front of the bed and kneeled down, taking off his shoes carefully like what I did to all my previous lover. I couldn't get even more cold or angry or upset at him; he was just a weak kid, despite of his age. "Wanna change to Pj's?"
He tried to talk as an answer, but the violent coughs rip off his will to try to produce his angelic voice, well I wish he wasn't trying so hard, he couldn't even breathe properly! He grabbed my hand as he lay down and roll on the bed, still coughing and pull me till I have to stand up to see him, he looked at me and nod weakly. Hopelessly I loosen his weak hands, drag his luggage into the wardrobe which was almost full with my clothes and unpack for him, taking out a matching pajama and put it besides him. Without a word I looked away, facing my back to his face and keep myself busy by turning on the fire-pit in front of the bed, trying to fix my mind to the flame-making so I don't have to follow my desire to take a peek.
Not long after I manage to turn on the flame, his cough had develop a new way to torture the-love-at-the-first-sight of mine which made my heart sinks into a new kind of pain either, "I'll see if there's a med for you…" I said in a quiet pathetic intonation, hopefully he wouldn't notice it. I seriously having a hate-love relationship with his cough, I meant that cough made me all worry about Gee, other word, keep me close with him and keep my mind 100% filled with his pictures, what a great relationship we both had. But Gerard, dear God, which heavenly hell or sinful heaven you made him from? How a man could look so pretty when being in such pain like that?
I rushed down as fast as I could, trying to distract my brain from the cough by focusing on where I located my medicine-cupboard. I found it and opening it not-so-carefully, browsing through all brand and name that the bottle had and found a new bottle of cough syrup and a strip of fever-pills. I grab some random bottled water from my kitchen and rushed back upstairs. I found Gerard forming a ball while snuggling inside my thick blanket, he had taken off his ear muffler but not the glove yet, he was also shivering a little.
I carefully lift him up and grab some pillow and put it between the hard bed-head and his back, to make him comfortable. I carefully pour the cough syrup into the measuring-spoon and put it into his mouth carefully. He was panting so hard and tries not to cough as he open his mouth slightly to dissolve the cough syrup. He also put lots of effort to gulp down the tiny white fever-pills, trying not to be interrupted by the cough.
"You want something else?" I asked him as gentle as I could. I was hell-worth worried of him.
Gerard looked at me with his weak yet innocent gaze; I wanted to hug him right there at that time without caring how he would react to it. He grabbed my hand and pulls me close; making my chin crashed his shoulder and rest there. He got me weak, I couldn't even find a guts to pull my face away, I just hope he wouldn't hear my heartbeat, I could make sure that he wouldn't notice my heating skins as his was hotter than mine.
"Gee?" I called out, half-choked. I was so fucking nervous, there was no one in the world could made me as weak and as chicken and as soft as ice cream like Gerard ever made me. I was such a hopeless man in front of him, and what worst? He got my whole heart in less than 24 hours.
He pulled my arm closer, putting it nears his chest and rests his head on mine I could feel his heart pounding my arm, so fast… "I want you…" the velocity was so unbearably fast, as fast as mine or maybe faster, or mine was the faster one? Oh holy shit wouldn't care. I could imagine how our hearts run into each other, crashing violently with a kiss in an embracement; our artery cling into each other and our vena hugs each other, sucking the blood of escaping love that wanted to be release, untamed feelings.
I gulped down my dried saliva, basically there was none I could gulp, I looked at him who had eyes fixed to mine, his bright greenish-hazel orbs were showing me a honesty and a little plead. I could hear his weak breathing like if his blood, his lungs, and of course the carbon dioxide was playing an orchestra of a ballad in my brain, what a shit man I am. "I… I'll stay…." I slip out an answer after the nerve cracking stare he gave me for about 5 seconds. It wasn't long, of course I knew it wasn't, but everything he did to me made me so nervous, I could feel the sweats were forming on my neck, even though I haven't sweat yet. I felt so nervous, like almost losing my virginity again.
He smiled slightly, letting go of my arms and slide down to the mattress. "Am… going to change…" I said as he nodded slightly.
I was half-running to my wardrobe, closing the door soundlessly and breathe harshly. WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT? I could feel, very clearly that I was getting a hard on, and it was going to be so fucking obvious if I just stay and stare and fuck… he was such a fucking tease fucking jerk fucking retard jerk and… fucking fuckable angel.
It took me 10 minutes to actually calmed down from my own struggling, got my body heat into normal again and change my clothes into a plain gray pajamas without having dirty thoughts around, from the innocent try to stare into his blinding pupil till the imagination of squeezing his round ass while marking his sexy back, I'll be a fucked up fool if I never wanted it but… he was still an innocent kid, if I say, 'Hey, want to fuck?' he might just stare and blink and understand none of it and even WORST, he might has a thought that I was the MOST DISGUSTING dude he would ever met! NOOOOOOOOOOOOO! I don't want to go to hell yet.
I have to inhale and exhale for about 5 times before actually open the door and meet him. I'm not going to fuck him, I tried to convince myself. Gladly, when I open the door, I found him lying on the bed, with hands hugging my pillow, sleeping like an angel. It reminds me of when he slept on the snow, my beautiful winter rose.
I climbed onto my bed carefully; trying not to make any single creaking sound or even a thud, don't want to bother Gerard's beauty sleep. I laid myself besides him, laid my head on my arms and watches on his back and his soft hair, I realize that I smiled. I wasn't close enough to him to hear his heart beat or feel his hair on my face, but close enough to be able to smell his sweet fresh scent and listen to how soft he breathe, like my favorite music that would never be forgotten in my brain, but sometimes a cough of sharp dagger stabs me on the heart, disturbing the beautiful sounds I enjoy.
This was the first time I've ever feel so much pain from watching someone being sick, especially the one that not even my lover, and more awesomely, we have just met in more or less 24 hours ago. Never been anyone in my life, my past lovers or my father (except my mother) made my throat breaking on its own and making the bones sting into my skin, with the bloods helping to paint the beautiful pain. The more pain you gave me, the more beautiful my feelings become, you made me worried, my love.
A few hours had past and I realize that I fell asleep when I had me awake from Gerard's painful cough. I sat up all the sudden, didn't mind my aching head and woke him up from his own sleep. He was coughing so badly with his body shivering, I was sure that the room was warm.
"Let's go to a doctor…" I said worriedly, holding his both hands tight so he would snap out to the reality.
His painful expression changed to sadness, "N-no… Frank…" he pushed me weakly and pull the blanket from me, wrapping his whole shivering body, his legs on his chest and I could make sure that he was squeezing them so tightly.
I massaged my temple, confused. "But Gerard… you have to…" I could hear my own voice became so matured, demanding but gentle. Or whatever, all I got in brain was how to get this childish man to get to the doctor and got a proper treatment or whatsoever.
He created a perfect pout with his lips, staring at me with startling orbs; he sure knew how to use his cuteness to melt people's heart. He made me want to gulp down all my feelings and emotions, the excitement, misery, hollows and lovely feelings he gave me could just rape me hard right there at that time, I was so beaten up.
He didn't say a word but I knew he was against my decision. I put my palm on his forehead trying to guess how hot he was (well, he is HOT), "You are hot; Gerard… and you've been coughing real hard. It would be a lie if you told me that you're okay. So, let's go to a doctor to make sure of it…" I tried to persuade him as soft and as gentle as I could ever be, I realize that I treat him so carefully like treating a child, but it was true, deep inside he was still a little boy, hiding from what he was scared and challenging everything he never see.
"But…" coughed, "But…" another cough, "I've been in there…" he sobbed, followed by more painful cough and a hiccup.
"Okay… okay… I get it…" I whimper, not able to resist any more pain he produce from that must be hurting throat. I knew even if I keep trying to persuade him and stand on my own decision I'd let him win, so the earlier it is, the best for him. "If you're not getting any better by tomorrow…" I tried to look into his eyes but fail, I looked at his arms instead, and continue, "I'll drag you to the doctor no matter what you say…" I rub away his tears and his watery eyes were drying away gradually. His greenish-hazel pupils show me the most innocent happiness that I have ever seen in this world, it flatters me.
"But I don't want…." He wrapped his hands around my neck, making me fall into his hug.
My heart was beating my chest painfully and I could swear it was going to break my limbs if I didn't do anything about it. But I was being careless; I hold Gerard tight and let his head rest on my shoulder. "Then you should get better real quick…" I patted his back-head softly wondering if he might able to hear my mad heart that was so going to beat the shit out of my limbs and flesh.
He was inhaling on my shoulder, on my pajama, on my NECK! He was SMELLING ON ME!!!! "You smell nice Frank~" he said randomly as he flop back to the mattress, lying on his pillow. His eyes looks drowsy, "I really like it~" he smiled and pass out, sleeping deeply already.
"Yes, I like it too."
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