Tammy meets Ray and Frank.
In the car on the way to the house I couldn't help but smile at how well Tammy and Bandit were getting on. Bandit was telling Tammy, very enthusiastically, about her favourite doll hermione (she is a big harry potter fan) and Tammy was playing along very well! My two daughters... I still could barely believe how quickly everything had changed! I had no idea about Tammy's existance until I got the call informing me about her mum, I was shocked to say the least. You see me and her mum were together for a year before one night out of the blue she broke up with me, no explanation. So I went to stay with my mum for a bit before sorting out somewhere else to live and the last thing I heard she had moved to England. She never even told me she was pregnant and I have no idea why not. Tammy hasn't asked me why I left yet which i'm suprised about, I would have thought she would be desperate for answers.
"Nearly there" Mikey told Tammy, disturbing me from my thoughts.
She looked up from Bandit when he said that and looked nervous again, not that I can blame her, this has all happened so quickly and it must be overwhelming for her. I want this go well because she deserves some happiness what with losing her mother and all. Her eyes are red all the time from crying and i'm worried she'll relapse into selfharm. The social services made sure to let me know about that; I suppose they had considered it possible as well.
The car came to a stop outside the house and we made our way over to the door deciding to leave the bags for later. Lindsey opened the door and led the way through to the living room.
As I stepped into the living room I only had time to register the presence of several other people in there before being practically rugby tackled in what I assume was meant to be a hug. There was some shouting and soon my feet were back on the floor and I found myself face to face with frank Iero. He gave me quite possibly the biggest smile i've ever seen before quickly pulling me in for yet another bone-crushing hug.
"maybe we should have warned her" Mikey mentioned to Gerard with a grin.
"But then it wouldn't have been nearly so funny!" Gerard exclaimed. Clearly they had been expecting Frank to be like this, in fact I should have as well but then again I had always assumed that the fan's perception of Frank as being some sort of over excitable, puppy loving, ball of fun as being exagerated! Clearly not.
I laughed and somehow managed to cough out a "nice to meet you!" despite the fact I could barely breath.
"I'm so glad i'm FINALLY meeting you!" he giggled before at last releasing me. Not expecting the sudden freedom to move I stumbled backwards and almost fell over, luckily for me Lindsey caught hold of me before I could stack it completely.
"Don't mind him" Gerard said cheerfully. "you'll get used to his way of saying hello soon enough!"
"Your turn next Gee" Frank said whilst hopping in Gerards direction.
"NO WAY!" Gerard shouted and started to run. Too slow. Frank was already on him and soon they were both on the floor, Gerard looking confused and Frank looking very pleased with himself.
"Let go of me!" Gerard shouted. Looking down at Frank who was currently clinging to his legs and humming to himself. As it didn't look like Frank was gonna let go any time soon Gerard looked to Mikey with a pleading expression on his face.
"You're on your own with this one" Mikey said backing away "if previous experience is anything to go on i'll just end up on the floor as well!"
shaking her head in mock despair Lindsey turned to me "They are all as bad as each other. sometimes it's like putting up with a load of 5 year olds!"
"I'm the grown up!" Bandit shouted whilst nodding in a very serious manner at her mum.
"Of course you are!" Lindsey said with a laugh.
While all this had been going on I hadn't noticed Ray come up behind me.
"Welcome to the madhouse" he said grinning before giving me a quick hug.
Bandit had gotten bored of staying out of the action by this point and ran over to join her dad and Frank, she was soon squealing as they both immediately started to tickle her.
"NO FAIR!!" she shrieked "Heeeeeeeeeeeeeelp!"
"You get Frank and i'll get your dad" Mikey said, and soon Mikey, Gerard and Ray were wrestling on the floor while Bandit chased Frank round the sofa.
Me and Lindsey stood off to the side laughing at the chaos in front of us, after a bit she tapped me on the shoulder and motioned towards the kitchen. We quietly made our way there and sat down at the table.
"Would you like a coffee?" she asked while starting to make one for herself.
"Thanks" In truth I needed one. As much fun as it had been so far I couldn't help but feel a little out of place here, but then again I had only just arrived and it would have been ridiculous to assume it would straight away be like home!
"So what do you think of them so far?" she asked me
"They're crazy!" I replied honestly.
She laughed and placed a mug of coffee in front of me.
" I smell coffee!" Mikey said from the doorway and we were quickly joined in the kitchin by the entire band. I looked at the table we were all sitting around, and with perhaps the exception of Bandit who was sitting on Ray's lap, this was quite possibly the wierdest situation I had ever been in. All of them were famous and yet here I was hanging out with them sipping coffee!
"Sorry about Frank's appauling behavior" Gerard said grinning at me
"HEY!" Frank gasped. "You're just bitter cos you lost!" He said whilst putting on a fake superior voice.
"nahh I won for sure!" Gerard argued and as it looked like they were about to start squabbling again Lindsey chucked a cushion at them and told them to cut it out.We quickly had our attention diverted when we heard a mischevious giggle and turned to find Bandit sticking straws into Ray's fro!
"What d'ya think?" He asked whilst doing a little pose
"you should keep it like that" Mikey informed him in a serious voice
"Hell yeah. You look sexy as me!" Frank added in a grave tone.
"what's your opinion?" Ray turned to look at me. I panicked internally. What should I say?!
"You should a couple of cocktail umbrellas to finish it off" I stated. gerard imediately got up to grab some out of a draw, before arranging them in Ray's hair amongst the straws. Bandit and Frank both giggled hysterically at that and soon we were all laughing again.
Later in the evening
It had been an amazing day I though to muself as I lay on my new bed in my new room. The room was purple and black with red fairy lights strung around the place. I sighed and smiled to myself, maybe I would be okay. I mean everyone was being so nice and I was getting on great with Gerard... DAD. I mentally reminded myself to refer to him as that. It was taking some getting used to but I suppose it's time I started to properly think of him as my dad since it's not gonna change anytime soon. A lot had changed though and with a pang of pain I remembered seeing my mum on the kitchen floor. Tears instantly sprung up and I found myself reliving those moments as my smile fell from my face at the sight of her. Soon I was sobbing into my pillow as had become my ritual and yet this time it was even worse as not only missing her but I felt guilt at the way I had forgotton her earlier. I wanted to hurt myself so badly. To see my blood and feel the calm that I knew would follow. I had to remind myself that it was bad... and quickly. I stood in front of the floor length mirror wearing only my underwear and stared at my scars. They were on my shoulder, arm, chest, stomach and legs. They were ugly and i was ashamed at myself for even considering going back to that. Feeling unclean I went into my en suit bathroom and took a shower. As the water poured down I decided I needed to let go of the me I once was. That girl hated herself and let others trample all over her, that girl was Tammy Evans. I'm Tammy Way. Daughter of Gerard Way and i'm sure as hell gonna make my life work this time around.