stupid silly little me.
That noise when you call someone, waiting for them to answer always made me nervous but not tonight, tonight I dont give a fuck.
"Hello, Mia?" He sounded muffled and sleepy.
"Have sex with me" I sounded confident, for some reason I felt it.
"What, I mean have you been drinking or something"
"No, just come over" I wasnt letting him go aswell.
"Mia what the fuck? I'm a little busy right now" He sounded confused and I was a little hurt.
Then I heard something, when I thought my day couldnt get any worse. It did.
"Gee baby, come back to bed" It was faded and distant but I heard the womans voice as clear as day.
"Oh" I just put the phone down grabbed my keys and drove and drove out of this shitty town music turned up and trying my best not to burst out crying.
I pulled in at a bar. One of those scary trucker ones that rapists go to but I felt like Bella Swan in New Moon I needed a rush and not a sugar rush.
Being emotional sucked.
AND THERE IS NO HOT PEOPLE IN THIS FUCKING BAR.
I knew having sex would change things.
So I drank and flirted and got free drinks and danced and drank.
my 34th shot later I was slurring my life story to mr fucking muscle.
"MooMom said thut shee would gurt mehe a doggie but but but it was a.. a fishie I WANTED A FUCKING DOGGIE I TOLD HER I WOULD CALL IT YODA AND SHE SAID ITS A GOOD NAME" I cried looking to my right I relised Mr muscle has left. Oh
"I DONT CARE EVERYONE LEAVES ME, IM A STRONG BLACK WOMAN THAT DONT NEED NO MAN" I Yelled. Then fell off my stool. Then got kicked out.
And for the second time today the calling tone didnt make me nervous, as I was sat on the curb waiting for Frank to pick up.
"Mia, what up? you know what time it is right?" He also sounded sleepy and muffled.
"Fuuuuuuuck you! you know what!? you fuckeddd me then got bored now you've traded me for that crazy bitch, shes still cray you know?!" I slurred.
"Mia, what?! are you drunk?! jesus christ, where are you? i'll come pick you up"
"Nop" I sang suddenly finding it funny.
"Mia, where are you?" He said sounding rushed and worried.
"I dont know" I laughed.
"Mia.." He started.
"Are you fucking her? like you fucked me?" I asked him, the humor gone.
"Mia, come on we're not having sex.."
"Everythings changed, I miss you and I want you and I like you and I liked Gerard to but nobody likes me, Im like the back-up or something" The humor was well and truly gone and I started to cry, loudly. Very loudly.
"Mia..Calm down. You need to help me find you, now come on where are you. Im worried"
"I DONT KNOW! Frankie im scared" I cried and it looks like Mr muscle was back with his friends acting drunk and rowdy..Like me?
"Give me something, what bar are you at?" he asked.
I looked up to the tacky neon sign.
"Um, The Doglist?" I hoped I was right as I couldnt really see straight.
"Shit really, In Newark?" He sounded more panicked, which scared me more as Frank was pretty cool 99% of the time.
"I dont know I just drove I was mad" I cried.
"Okay Okay Mia, darling Im coming now find somewhere safe, Im on my way" He coo'ed.
"Wait, don't leave me" I slurred.
"I have to, I'll be with you soon, and Mia?" He asked
"Yeah?" I hicupped
"I love you" He said softly then hung up. I pulled my knees to my chest and sang to myself, little lulabys my Mother used to sing to me. I smiled to myself whilst singing. When I got another text, what now.
I'm sorry, Its not what it seems I promise -G xox
I don't remember anything after that. I just blacked out. Scared. Confused. and Hurt.
I woke up in a car it was dark I was sobered up a little and everything hurt, Frank was sat in the drivers seat gripping the wheel hard.
"Frank?" My voice sounded like I just gave a cactus a blowjob. Awesome.
"You're in trouble" He muttered.
"Sorry, I'll get drunk closer to home next time" I sat up and hissed as my head thudded.
"Its not that and you know it, I was fucking worried" He scolded.
"I'm not a child you know"
"Stop acting like one, then" He retorted.
"Why are you such a dick now, you used to be fun, fucking hell"
"If i'm such a killjoy next time i'll just leave you passed out in one of the roughest areas, okay?" sarcasm dripping from his voice.
"Fine" I snapped back, checking my phone to find i had replied to Gerard with 'Fuxck you!!' great. Just great.
After a while of silence (which I could have kept up) Frank spoke.
"Sorry, Its late I havent slept and I was worried" He fessed.
"I'm sorry to, I was just..Upset" I told him, truthfully.
"Cos of me?" He asked the question I was hoping he wouldnt.
"Yeah" I replied lowly.
"Mia, we said tha.." I cut him off again.
"I know what we said, so lets drop it" I told him, smiling.
"I don't like upsetting you" He told me, his eyes still on the road.
"I know, I blame myself"
And that was that, we went back to his and we got in his bed and we slept, just slept with each other. He put his arms around me and we talked about old times for hours untill we both fell asleep.