Categories > Original > Drama > Why Does This Exist?

The New Bitch

by nerdvodka 0 reviews

This is really bad on purpose and it's a friendfiction. Please enjoy.

Category: Drama - Rating: PG-13 - Genres: Erotica,Humor,Parody - Warnings: [V] [X] [?] - Published: 2016-03-11 - Updated: 2016-03-11 - 962 words

0Unrated
It was ur average day at Astronaut Highschool for the SQU AD except for the fact they were about to have a new member.
       “GEE AM I GAY” said the beloved ginger, Makena putting her leg on top of the lunch table and knocking Lukes shark lunchbox off of table.
       “What the fuck Makena. I’m a rude douche who pretends to hate everyone because I don’t know to express affection!” Luke said throwing his arms in the air dramatically before continuing to tell Josh about some meaningless bullshit that makes no sense.
      “WOW MAKENA ME 22” shouted Hannah in return whilst fingering herself. In this fic she has brown hair because fuck you Hannah you can’t have everything bitch.
       “WANNA GET GAY MARRIED?” screeched Makena.
       Before Hannah could answer a girl entered the cafeteria walking in strides and knocking multiple people over. “WOW FUCK MY ASS THAT GIRL IS HOT.” Makena said sweeping everyones meals off of the table with her leg.
       “What the fuck, Makena I thot we were getting gay marriage” Hannah muttered, glaring at the NEW GRILL in distaste.
       “NOPE I WANT A PIECE OF DAT ASS” Makena shouted, before throwing herself on top of the new student.
        “I’m Julie tho” said the girl licking her lips as she looked Makena in the eye.
         “I kno who u are” whisper Makena, before the two started making out vigorously on the floor of the cafeteria in a pile of fries of which were knocked off of the table by Makenas leg action.
          “HOMO IS ILEGAL” Luke screeched before transforming into a frog and hopping away.
           “Holy fuck” Mary said standing on top of the table and pointing a dramatic anime finger at the two as they continued to make out. “You’re JULIE” She stated. Julie pulled away from Makena, looking up at Mary.
            “Dat me” she said putting her hand on Makenas tity.
            “YOU’RE FAMOUS FOR SOME REASON THAT THE WRITER HASN’T FIGURED OUT YET.” She said putting her hands to her face and making a really shocked expression like this :O
            “Woah that girls FAMOUS?” Josh said taking off his glasses and throwing them. “For what!?”
            “She’s a model or some shit.” Mary responded, nonchalantly.
             Ari sat there quietly eating her icecream for she had nothing to say to this mess. This was pretty similar to the average day with the meme team aside from the new member. Also the only person she ever really talked to, transformed into his true frog self and hopped away. There were no worries because he was sure to be back before their next class started.
          “Yeah, that’s just GREAT” Hannah said, her voice sounding tense. She clenched her fist. “I’ve gotta go.” She stood up grabbing her things and storming off. Hannah was jealous af because her gril had been stolen by this random bitch. She had worked for YEARS to get this close to Makena and this random new bitch just REPLACED HER. 
        Soon, the bell rang, Luke returned to his human form coming back to meet the others as they all walked to class together.
         When they got to English and settled down the teacher, Ms. BITCHelder introduced Julie at the front of the class room. “All you really need to know about her is that she’s better than you. What is ur name, Juli?” She asked Julie.
         “It’s Julie.” Responded Julie.
          “Now class, when Julie says “its Julie” what is she REALLY trying to convey?” She said drawing a dick on the board. Julie took a seat next to Makena as class went on. Moments after, Hannah returned to class, taking notice to the new girl in her seat.
          “What the actual FUCK is going on here? First you steal my woman, then you steal my seat? What’s next? You steal my high-tech sex toy collection!? I can’t fucking believe this.” Hannah screamed internally.
          “I don’t see your fucking name on any of these things” Julie said pulling a single robo-dildo out of her backpack. On the tag it said “Part of H’s high-tech sex toy collection”
           “You BITCH” Hannah said, narrowing her eyes. She took this as a challenge. Suddenly Makena intervened.
           “HANNAH!!!! Cun’t u be happy 4 me????” She said taking off her glasses to reveal a super anime tear. “I final found the love of my lyfe!!!11!!!!ONE!!!!”
            “no.” Hannah said before unsheathing her anime sword.
             “So that’s the way you want to play?” Julie said, tossing the stolen dildo behind her and standing up. “TRADSDOFROOOOOOOOOM!!!!!oen!!!!!!112111111” Suddenly she transformed into a slutty animu girl and pulled out an anime sword of her own.
              “Wow holy shit u guys!!!!!” Josh shouted, turning on the LED lights on his glasses for some reason.
               “Why is she wearing a skirt that short. I can see her vagina. What is the point in wearing a skirt if she’s going to leave her vagina just hanging the fuck out like that.” Ari commented.
                “Guys don’t do it!!!!” screamed Mary. But it was too late.
                 “Memes.” Luke said, indicating that the battle had begun.
                  “MAKENA IS MINE!” Screamed Hannah running at Julie.
                  “MAKENA LOVES ME MORE, BITCH!” Julie shouted, before screaming her battlecry and charging at Julie. Makena watched in horror as the bloody battle went on because of her.
                  “OW YOU CUT OFF MY FUCKING CLITORUS” Hannah shielding her crotch area as tears came out of her eyes.
                 “AND NOW IT’S TIME TO FINISH YOU.” Julie said holding her sword over her head about to swing down on Hannahs head.
                 “Honestly, looking at her vagina this whole battle has made me straight.” Ari mentioned.
                 “Well, shit, whatcha gonna do.” Mary shrugged.
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