Categories > Anime/Manga > Naruto > Sasuke's Secret

Sasuke no Himitsu!

by arichang 0 reviews

Naturally, our dear Uchiha's point of view is definitely hotter... and more intelligent... right?

Category: Naruto - Rating: R - Genres: Humor, Romance - Characters: Naruto, Sasuke - Warnings: [?] - Published: 2006-08-22 - Updated: 2006-08-23 - 7156 words

2Funny
Sasuke no Himitsu!
A SasuNaru One-Shot

Disclaimer:
The usuals.

Author's Note:
If you haven't already read it, I suggest reading Naruto's Secret first... otherwise there'll be some things you just won't get (like why Naruto is in a dress, for example). This being a companion fic, it was written with the assumption that the reader has already read /Naruto's Secret /which you can find if you click my pen name up there: points. Uhm... I hear it's worth reading, so don't worry about it. Also, there's a companion fic that takes place after this story-/Sakura's Secret/. Of course, it's up to you to read it.

Language Notes:
All Japanese terms are in italics - that includes salutations and titles.

X x X

Uchiha Sasuke had no idea why... and he had no idea when it had first started either. Perhaps it was when the idiot had helped him out that one time, completely unexpectedly; forget the fact that the guy had asked for a fight right afterwards.

That was another thing he didn't really understand. Sasuke had no recollection whatsoever of having done anything to him... he had no idea why the usuratonkachi insisted on beating the crap out of him every waking moment of the day, regardless of the fact that he had never once succeeded to win in a fight before. One minute Sasuke was walking through life, minding his own business, and the next he was exchanging blows with a strange blond-haired idiot he'd only ever acknowledged as the class clown. Not only was it tiring, it was completely unexpected...

He wasn't exactly used to being unprepared for things.

Also, though Sasuke hated to admit it, the idiot /was/, indeed, getting stronger - fights were starting to get a little harder, and he had a bit more difficulty now than, say, five years ago when they were all still twelve, to stay in the lead.

That was unexpected too.

Sasuke sighed as he waited to cross the street. The blond was loud, annoying, obnoxious, without decorum and extremely irritating. And/, /he kept insisting that he was his "rival". Sasuke had to laugh. That Uzumaki? A rival? No matter which way you looked at it, he was, of course and without a doubt, the better of the two. Sasuke had the grades, the looks, the girls... oh yeah, Sasuke had the girls. He moaned inwardly. Actually, that was one thing Naruto could definitely have.

Well anyway... what troubled the Uchiha now was the fact that... well... due to some strange circumstances, he'd started actually worrying about the idiot. Sasuke wasn't sure when he had begun noticing the little differences in Naruto... nor why he was even aware of them at all. Naruto and he were never close - they were, at best, sparring partners. They spoke with their fists; otherwise it was the heated silences or angry words they often exchanged. For some strange reason, Naruto was irritated whenever Sasuke was around - that in turn irritated /him/.

It was, indeed, very strange.

Sasuke looked up at the blue sky as he walked along the streets. He remembered the first time he'd set eyes on the boy. It was a long, long time ago - probably when they were still in elementary school. Sasuke had been sitting down on a park bench (or something like that), minding his own business and reminiscing, when he felt that prickly feeling one gets while being watched. He turned around to spot Naruto watching him from behind a tree, looking as if he was wondering whether he should walk over and say hi. Sasuke's first impression had been surprise, the next was What a weirdo! Sasuke had stared at him, wondering what he would do when, quite suddenly, Naruto made a face at him and stalked off. Taken aback, Sasuke stuck out his tongue and continued staring at the empty lake in front of him. After that, they never really talked much. It was only in junior high that they began to actually get to know each other. They'd been teamed up for a Science project - Sakura, Naruto and himself - and forced to work together. Albeit, more fighting was done rather than actual "work"... Sasuke had to admit it was one of the more amusing episodes of his life. Yeah, he liked those times.

Though, it had always irritated him a little how blatantly "in love" Naruto was with Haruno Sakura. The girl obviously had no interest in him - her incessant (and relatively annoying) pursuit of his own affection was proof enough for that - and yet, the idiot seemed not to get the hint. To be honest, Sasuke had very much considered finally accepting her (for the sake of, you know, /being left alone/), however... a part of him - a very apparently retarded part of him, Sasuke now liked to say - remembered how serious Naruto was about her. And so, the last time she sought him, he'd rejected her... completely, totally and with no hope whatsoever of a revival. He knew Sakura was heartbroken, but really, what was he to do? She was a good teammate to him; he had no business being romantically involved with someone who could potentially make team meetings awkward. As pretty as Sakura was, he wasn't interested in her - and really, total rejection was the best way of handling situations such as these (particularly when it concerned someone you're more than just acquainted with), giving her false hope would hurt her further. Now, if only the rest of that ridiculous fan club would understand this. They seemed to think - every single one of them - that every rejection was self-sacrifice on Sasuke's part.

Strangely enough, Naruto was angry at the selfless act... and their friendship actually got worse.

Sasuke had to smile to himself. Friendship, huh?

Would it be too dangerous to call Naruto a friend?

He recalled two years ago when the dobe had marched on over and (tried to) beat the hell out of him for messing around with a bad crowd. Naruto had dragged him to the hospital afterward; not that Sasuke needed it really. In fact, it was Naruto who fainted on top of him when they got to the door.

He chuckled. He truly was an idiot.

Of course, though Sasuke would never ever admit to something like that, he was kind of grateful for what Naruto did.

"Sasuke-/sama/!" someone called behind him.

/Shit/. He thought he'd lost them. Sasuke made a quick beeline into the nearest shop and hid behind a mannequin. He was used to their pursuits by now, but something about today seemed to have made his followers a bit more rabid than usual. He looked around. Why did girls always, /invariably/, travel in packs? It made losing them all the more difficult - hiding from eight eyes was so much more difficult than hiding from two.

Spotting the street sign, he sighed. He still had a few more streets to go. Earlier that day, Hyuuga Neji had suggested to Sasuke to dine at a pub he knew about downtown. His senpai had said he would tag along - but something "last minute" came up and he told him to go without him. Though, in all honesty, Sasuke didn't feel like he could be bothered - it was quite out of the way - but... he had nothing else better to do. Besides, Neji hardly ever said anything and when he did it was usually definitely worth listening to. Or at least, that's the impression Sasuke had.

But the strange pub seemed to be quite far away from their district. How did Neji hear about it again?

After confirming it was safe, he continued walking and his mind began to settle once again on the perplexing blond. To be honest, Sasuke had recently been noticing a few things that were off about the blond. He wasn't entirely sure why he noticed such things, particularly because Sakura made it pretty clear he was the only one who noticed them (having asked her if she noticed anything)... but that didn't change the fact that yes, the blond was acting strange. Sasuke couldn't exactly put a finger on it, but he felt as if Naruto was trying desperately to hide something.

He stopped in front of a friendly-looking pub. Hmm... it looked pretty decent.

He crossed the street and was relieved to find that none of the girls followed him. Maybe the pub had other uses - indeed, this place did not seem like a place Sasuke-/sama/ would go to. He pushed open the door and was greeted by a couple of Irrashaimase!'s from several corners. He looked around. A lot of kids his age seemed to have gathered here, however he didn't see anyone he knew.

Good.

He walked forward, meaning to take a seat at the bar. Suddenly, a girl with long blonde hair stumbled in front of him. Though he hadn't meant to do anything of the sort, his reflexes acted on their own and he grabbed her waist.

/Shit/. She was heavy.

An empty cup threatened to shatter into tiny pieces and he grabbed that with his other hand before it managed to slide off her tray. He sighed. He hated careless women.

He looked down at the burden he was carrying. She wasn't moving. He sighed again.

"You're not very light, you know." He was just being honest.

The blonde girl started and almost dropped the tray. Sasuke hoped she wouldn't be his server tonight. Finally, the girl straightened herself and Sasuke let go. He dusted his black shirt which was suddenly coated with a bit of sugar from the tray the girl was holding.

Without looking up, he said, "You're clumsy, aren't you?" He stuck out his left hand to give her the cup.

She didn't take it. Argh... annoying...

"Are you going to take it or not?" Sasuke looked up, eyebrow raised.

The girl wasn't looking at him, she was staring at the floor. She took the cup, bowed and without a word, practically ran off. Sasuke stared after her retreating back. What a strange woman...

He took a seat at a bar and grabbed a menu. Sasuke sighed. What was he doing here? Looking around, he noticed that there were only four people who worked here - two of which were behind the bar, in the kitchen... or at least what seemed to be the kitchen. There was a white-haired man, who Sasuke assumed was the boss and probably the husband of a rather bossy-looking obaa-san/. The old lady had blonde hair, just like the clumsy waitress earlier - perhaps they were family? Somewhere in the corner, a small black-haired girl was serving. She had on a strange looking back-pack, the kind in which Sasuke /knew you could hardly put anything - they were probably just for show - and, strangely enough, it looked like a /pig/.

Strange place.

Ah well... he was there, so he might as well eat something.

Looking around, he moaned when he realized he would only be able to talk to the clumsy girl. Ah well.

"Excuse me, waitress?"

He waited.

Now, if Sasuke hadn't known any better... he could've sworn the girl was purposely ignoring him; but that was a ridiculous thought. Girls didn't ignore Uchiha Sasuke, oh no... they fawned over him. Not that it mattered much to him in any way... he was just saying. He continued looking at the menu, thinking of what he should order. He was a patient man. He could wait.

Eventually, he became aware of a presence right in front of him. Without looking up, he said, "I thought you'd never show."

"I'm sorry, sir." Sasuke winced at the overly-girlish voice.

"Set A and a beer."

"Is that all, sir?"

He placed the menu on the table and looking up at the girl said, "Yeah."

The girl looked away, a faint blush present. Sasuke moaned. Not another one.

"Alright then!"

Sasuke stilled. He stared at the girl in front of him who was now - quite bizarrely - staring at the wall. Something about her felt... really familiar. Her blue eyes... they reminded him of...

"Naru-"

"Naruko-/chan/!"

The girl ran off at the call of - what apparently was - her name. Sasuke watched her back. Naruko/... /huh? Interesting.

Eventually, the strange blonde girl returned with his order. Sasuke looked up at her, mostly because he wanted to confirm, his suspicions.

"Thank you."

"You're beer's coming in a sec!" Naruko smiled at him. Sasuke's eyes grew wide - a little, just a little. She blushed, looked away again and hurried away.

Sasuke smirked.

There was no mistaking it... but now... he just needed to know /why/.

Sasuke spent the next five or so hours - he wasn't so sure himself, really - staring at his food and trying to find a possible reason for his suspicion. Apparently, he had nothing else better to do anyway... and who knows how many stalkers were still lurking around? Somehow, the thought of Naruto cross-dressing just didn't seem... right/. As far as Sasuke knew, Naruto was the straightest guy around (next to himself, of course)... to say this strange, blonde and extremely clumsy girl was Naruto was like saying Kakashi was punctual. Though, she /did resemble him in so many ways. Sasuke had no proof, of course... it was just a feeling.

The strangest thing, however, was the fact that... well... even if Sasuke managed to prove that this girl with the blue eyes was indeed Naruto in make-up and a dress... he didn't think he would mind all that much. Which was, really, strange. Sasuke could've sworn he was a homophobe of some sort. At least, that's what he'd thought.

Argh... Naruto had a way of messing with his brain in confusing ways, honestly.

Why and when did Naruto make cross-dressing okay?

Did it really matter (s)he looked pretty cute in that dress and the two pony-tails?

"/Che/," Sasuke muttered into his beer. Something was still wrong.

"Uh, sir," a soft, high and hesitant voice coughed above him, "the pub will be closing soon..."

Heh... was (s)he trying to kick him out? Didn't the sign outside say 24-hours or something like that?

"When?"

She looked at him rather pointedly. Sasuke had to stop himself from smirking.

"Uh. At one."

Liar.

"Okay." Sasuke returned to his beer and ignored her presence once again. No. It wasn't Naruto. It couldn't possibly be Naruto. Naruto wouldn't be polite to him no matter the circumstance. Ever. In truth, the girl had yet to talk in any way that would resemble Naruto and really, Sasuke was only being wei-

"Anno ne/," a voice interrupted his thoughts. He almost dropped his beer. /You've got to be kidding me... "If you don't mind my asking, what's a handsome guy like you doing all alone in a pub like this? Surely your girlfriend must be worried or-"

Sasuke's eyebrow twitched. Handsome... guy...

"I'm trying to avoid some nasty people."

Okay... a little freaky. Was this really Naruto or not...? Or maybe he was trying to hide his true identity? Honestly though... would Naruto really be so idiotic as to think no one would recognize him in that shitty - albeit cute - get up? No... it wasn't Naruto. Or wait... Naruto was an idiot to begin with, wasn't he? What if he honestly thought he could get away with-

"Trying to run away from your fan club, I see."

Sasuke paused. In truth, he'd almost laughed out loud right there. Naruto really was an idiot, wasn't he? Heh... this situation actually had the potential of being relatively fun. He looked up at Naruko, an eyebrow raised.

"I didn't say anything about a fan club."

It was obvious Naruko was troubled. He just had to smirk.

"Ah well, you know," Naruko scratched her head (all innocent-like), "a guy like you... surely would have a fan club... heh...heh..."

Sasuke smirked. Whatever it was Naruto was trying to do... he was failing.

If it really was Naruto, that is. A fact of which Sasuke was at least 87.6% sure.

But... seriously... how dare (s)he mention the fan club. He snorted.

"Those girls are annoying. They think they know me. They claim to fall in love with me and shit. But honestly, what do they even know about me, huh? I don't get it. I give them the cold shoulder, act like the perfect bastard and son of a bitch... and they still won't leave me alone," Sasuke shook his head and resumed drinking his beer. "They seriously need boyfriends."

Then I can bloody be left alone.

"You know," Naruko suddenly said, causing Sasuke to look up, "girls like a challenge. Maybe they're after you because you're still single. You know... it's sort of telling them Yeah, I'm free and up for grabs! I'm the perfect cool guy. Come after me!" She laughed a small laugh. "In my opinion, you are the one who needs a girlfriend."

Naruko paused. Sasuke stared.

"Then again, maybe if you do get a girlfriend... those frightening girls would go after /her/."

A strange look of comprehension dawned on her face.

"You're not staying away from girls because you know whoever you pick will probably lose her life... are you?"

Sasuke blinked. That was the most Naruto had ever said to him... in his life.

That was... kind of funny. What he just said was actually rather funny too.

So... he laughed.

He didn't really know why he was suddenly laughing as if Naruko had just said the funniest joke in the world... but he was laughing alright. The look on Naruko's face which barely fell short of shock made him laugh even more. Amusing... this was all very, very amusing.

"You're an interesting," he paused and eyed Naruko. He was pretty much sure who (s)he was, "girl."

"Naru...", he continued, still staring at her, "/ko/... /chan/, was it?"

Naruko smiled.

"You seem to have a fan club of your own."

She laughed. "Oh really, they're just a bunch of silly boys."

"Your boyfriend must be worried."

Naruko kept smiling. "Oh... I don't have one!"

Sasuke looked up. "Oh really? That's a surprise."

"Whatever do you mean?"

"A girl like you," Sasuke said softly, careful to turn on his charms, "I'm sure you have tons of guys after you. Why not just get one?"

"Well, the right one just hasn't come along, that's all."

Sasuke blinked... and laughed. Again.

He had to admit, Naruto wasn't too bad at pretending to be a girl. He was actually a bit charmed.

Sasuke stilled. Wait a minute. Why didn't it bother him? Wasn't he a closet homophobe? Sasuke looked at Naruko through the rim of his mug, finally draining it. Naruto really messed his brains up... or maybe it was the beer.

Wait... who the fuck got drunk on beer?

Hmm... Anyway, maybe he could try a little experiment. It was Naruto's turn to get his brain mushed.

"By the way," he said finally, "the reason why I choose not to go out with any of the girls in my precious fan club has nothing to do with me being nice." He looked up at her. "It's more like... there's already someone I like."

He watched as a slight hesitation showed themselves on Naruto's features.

Hmm... Naruto was pretty good. At acting, that is. Naruko tilted her head, as if to encourage him to continue.

Now... really... why wasn't Naruto this normal at school?

Then again... cross-dressing... wasn't exactly... /normal/... was it?

"He hates me though."

Wait... what did he just say?

"Oh! I'm sure that's not true!" was Naruko's answer. He blinked. Ah well... since he started he might as well finish.

"We always argue," he ventured.

"At least you two talk and know the other exists, yeah?"

"We always fight. Physically," he continued...

"Physical contact is always good." /Is it really? /Sasuke smirked.

Wait no... what was he talking... thinking about. He looked into his mug. There was something else in the beer, wasn't there?

But... seriously... did Naruto really not... notice...

Idiot.

He looked at his watch (for lack of anything else more productive to do) and was surprised to find that it was nearly 1:30 AM. How long had he been talking to him?

Sasuke stood up. Naruko smiled at him and bowed. "Come again some other time, Sasuke-/kun/!"

Sasuke stared at him. Okay... he was getting a little confused.

"I don't remember... giving you my name."

Was Naruto trying to let him know that he knew that he knew... or ... was Naruko still not sure about whether Sasuke knew and just wanted to make sure he... did? So... Naruto wanted Sasuke to know? Or did he not want... Argh. Dammit.

Stupid beer.

"I... uh," Naruko suddenly spoke up, "I'm... psychic!"

Sasuke stared again. He snorted. You're kidding me...

"You really remind me of a friend of mine, Naruko."

"Oh?"

He knew Naruto was stupid... but this...

"Yeah, and the funny thing is... his name's Naru/to/. Interesting coincidence, eh?"

Naruko looked obviously perturbed. That fact that Naruto and her were one was now beyond a doubt. Unless Naruto had a secret (evil) twin sister he didn't know about (which he doubted)... Naruko was definitely Naruto.

"He's an idiot," Sasuke continued. He smiled at (the rather cute) way Naruko's eyebrows twitched.

"Is he now?"

"Totally."

He had to hold his breath to stop from smirking. He could almost imagine what Naruto was wishing he was doing to him right now.

"Well, I guess I should get going," he said finally. /Hook/. "/Ne/, you know how you said you didn't have a boyfriend?"

Naruko smiled... and Sasuke's heartbeat - quite strangely - grew momentarily erratic... He could've sworn small, cartoonish flowers floated behind Naruto just then... if only for a split second. He pushed those disturbing thoughts and strangely new emotions aside. Now was not the time for introspection (honestly, he'd been doing much too much of that recently). He concentrated on the present and reached out to hold Naruko by the chin. /Line/. Hmm... the make-up really did make him look cute up close... he even managed to get rid of those strange scars. He wondered for a while if Naruto did the make up on his own... when he realized what he was doing was just /weird/. Uh... where was he? Oh yes...

"I rather like the idea of winning that position, actually." /Sinker/.

He wasn't entirely sure where that had come from... but it was better than nothing. At least now, Naruto was convinced that Sasuke thought Naruko was a woman.

He turned (with a flourish) and left the pub without looking back. The idea of make the blond squirm felt strangely... exciting.

A few streets away, he stopped in his tracks.

Wait one minute.

Why had Neji told him to go to that pub?

X x X

Sasuke stared at the board as the teacher attempted to teach a rather uncooperative class the importance of trigonometric functions. He never really paid attention in class, to be completely honest. Not that it affected his marks any, he was just saying.

Anyway...

He had to chuckle to himself when he thought of Naruto's feeble attempts at avoiding him. The poor boy was obviously distraught and frightened; any doubts Sasuke had about Naruko's identity were effectively wiped clean when Naruto made a fairly obvious beeline the opposite direction this morning upon meeting him in the hallway. If Naruto thought avoiding him would allow Sasuke not to compare the obvious similarities between Naruko and Naruto... well... he had another thing coming.

Besides... how many blue-eyed blondes were there in Tokyo anyway?

Exactly.

However, apart from that... Sasuke had other things on his mind. First and foremost was the strange invitation Neji-/senpai/ had issued him to go to the pub where he found (to his amusement) a cross-dressing Naruto. Was it a coincidence? Or was it Neji's express intent to show Sasuke this interesting scene? If so, why?

Or better yet... why did Neji know at all?

After seeing Naruto yesterday, Sasuke concluded that this was why Naruto had been acting weird as of late - leaving school early, being jumpy, making sure no one followed him, etc. He didn't want people knowing about his job. Was Naruto ashamed of being gay? Sasuke wasn't sure... Or maybe, there was some other circumstance. Perhaps Naruto wasn't gay... he was just forced to dress up the way he was for some other reason. Was that... a good thing? That Naruto wasn't... gay?

Why did Sasuke even care?

... and did Neji really know?

Sasuke sighed inwardly. So, maybe Neji did know... did that really matter? Why did it feel like it mattered at all? It was common knowledge that Neji was an "equal opportunities" type of person and swung either way. If he was interested in Naruto, it certainly wasn't any of Sasuke's concern. Interest (of the romantic or sexual type) was the only reason Sasuke could come up with... why else would Neji know about Naruto's obviously very secret job?

Unless... Naruto told him...

But no... Naruto wouldn't tell Neji that. He wasn't all that close to Neji, as far as Sasuke knew. Besides, Neji was bound to tell Lee and Lee was one of Naruto's main rivals for Sakura's affection (Sasuke very conveniently forgot to include himself in the equation)...Then again... Naruto had stopped pursuing Sakura... in fact, it had been quite a while since the last time Naruto insisted on going out on a date with the pink-haired girl. Sasuke frowned towards the board.

Was there something between Neji-/senpai/ and Naruto?

Why was Sasuke even thinking about this? This was ridiculous... his friends' love lives were none of his business. It shouldn't be bothering him at all that he knew practically nothing of Naruto's love life.

Hell, he didn't even know he had one.

And seriously... what did Neji see in Naruto?

Or better yet, what did Naruto see in Neji? Neji was a slightly disturbing, pale-skinned and quiet type of guy. He hardly ever said anything and whenever he did, it felt as if he said it in a condescending sort of voice (Sasuke failed to note the apparent resemblance of Neji towards someone very much like himself). If anything, it was rather irritating... and certainly it was the kind of person Sasuke thought Naruto would find irritating. He surely did.

So what did Naruto see in him?

Wait...

Why did he even care?

Sasuke rubbed his temple. He couldn't help but think he'd been thinking much too much recently. Definitely not a good thing when it gave him imaginary headaches.

X x X

Sasuke paused in front of the pub.

Why was he here? Again? Neji hadn't mentioned the pub since the last time he had invited Sasuke... and he had an exam tomorrow. He should be home, studying. Or something. He sighed.

For some strange inexplicable reason... he wanted to make sure Naruko was here. Without Neji.

He shrugged. He'd figure that out later.

Upon opening the pub doors he was greeted with a cheerful and happy-sounding Irrashaimase//!

He had to smile. "You look bored, Naruko-/chan/."

"Uchiha-/san/!"

Sasuke stared. Was Naruto seriously trying to hint something?

"When did I give you my last name?"

She laughed. "I'm... /psychic/, remember?"

Sasuke smirked. "Ah. Right." I almost forgot. He's an idiot.

To his surprise... Naruko suddenly smiled at him.

"Same thing as yesterday?"

Sasuke nodded, slowly. "If you still remember it."

Naruko smiled, and if Sasuke didn't know any better, he would've said there was a hint of mischief in that smile.

"How could I forget what you ordered?"

Sasuke spent the next couple of hours watching Naruko working and talking to her. As unlikely, silly and stupid as it may seem... it looked as if Naruto was... well... flirting with Sasuke.

That was not normal.

Naruko was Naruto, wasn't she?

So why was (s)he... flirting with him?

Eventually, Naruko put away the last mug in the pile of dishes to dry and sat in front of him, behind the counter. He looked up at her, over the rim of his mug, eyebrow raised. She was looking at him with a strange twinkle in her eye and a definitely unrecognizable expression. Usually when Naruto looked at him it was with a face crumpled with dislike and hate, or a sneer that said, Ha! I will beat you today! ... At the moment Naruko was regarding him with a strangely peaceful expression.

He wasn't entirely used to it.

So... when Naruko suddenly smiled, he had to blush.

Holy shit. Uzumaki was making the Uchiha ... blush/. Sasuke looked down at his beer. Maybe, just maybe, Naruto was drugging him or something. Then again, was the /dobe smart enough for something like that and what would he accomplish? Naruto wouldn't really gain anything from intoxicating Sasuke so...

Sasuke looked up, and to his surprise found Naruko asleep on the counter-top. He blinked.

Sasuke waved at the space in front of her and when he failed to receive a reaction, he blinked again.

Naruto... was... sleeping in front of him.

He drained his beer, still watching Naruko for any signs of rousing. This was, indeed, a strange phenomenon. Naruto, the one who would always be tense and uncomfortable around him... was... asleep.

For reasons unknown to him, he put his mug down and reached out to touch Naruko's hair.

It was definitely a wig.

It was much too soft to be Naruto's hair.

Don't ask him why he knew that... he just did.

He sighed. He checked the time and realized it was almost 12 AM. Should he go home? He looked back at Naruto and the open pub door... and smiled. Nah... going home wouldn't be too smart an idea considering the fact that Naruto was very vulnerable-looking right now-

Wait... what did Naruto's being vulnerable have any/thing to do with anything? He sighed again. /Looking around, he found the keg where the beer was being kept. Ah... perfect. More beer. Alcohol was good. He stood up and walked around the counter, and helped himself to more beer. He returned to his seat and continued watching Naruko.

She was sleeping peacefully, moist lips slightly parted. Her breathing was even and calm. Sasuke had to admit, as a girl, Naruto looked pretty cute. But... Sasuke thought he looked better as himself. Without the make-up and the fake, overly-soft hair... Naruto was natural and healthy-looking. Sasuke liked that about him.

Sasuke stilled.

Dear lord... Sasuke was, actually, sounding just a little...

Uh... never mind.

For the next couple of hours or so, Sasuke watched Naruto. Something about the way he looked so carefree made him undeniably intriguing to watch. Suddenly, Naruto jumped, hitting his head on the shelf above him. Sasuke smirked.

"Sa-Sasuke!"

He drained his mug. "I couldn't just leave you, could I? Someone could've just waltzed right in, raped you and robbed you, /dobe/."

If Naruto didn't get it by now...

"I hope you don't mind, but I helped myself to some more beer. I'll pay, of course."

When Sasuke looked up, he found Naruko still staring at him mouth open wide. He had to laugh.

"You look cute all terrified like that."

What in the hell was he saying?

"Sa-Sasuke... you..."

Sasuke raised an eyebrow. "My, calling me by my first name in such an informal matter... didn't know we were so close."

Okay... to be honest... Sasuke was scaring himself just a little.

Naruto shut his mouth and looked away, looking obviously disturbed. It dawned on Sasuke what he was thinking. Haha... how cute.

"Don't worry, /usuratonkachi/," he said, draining his mug. "I didn't touch you."

Naruto stared at him. He smiled.

"I may act like a son of a bitch, but I'm not a bad person, you know. I wouldn't touch a girl without her permission. Besides," he said, resting the mug on the bar top, "I was fine just watching you sleep."

The strange thing was... it was all /true/. He watched as Naruto looked helplessly around, obviously feeling very awkward and anxious. Maybe Sasuke was being too mean to him? Nah... Naruto looked cute all distressed and worried.

... Why did Sasuke sound very sadistic just then?

He watched Naruko. Damn... He really was an idiot. Naruto, that is.

Sasuke leaned in and held Naruko's chin. "You're a very beautiful girl. You should avoid falling asleep like that in front of guys. You have no idea how many of them would want to ravage you."

He let go and looked her in the eyes.

"Including me."

Strange though it was... at that moment... Naruto did look fairly kissable. No... Naruko did. Not...

"Really, stop keeping your mouth open like that. It makes me want to kiss you."

And... he did. He pulled Naruto in, only god knows why, and let their lips touch. They were rougher and stronger than they looked - proving, once again, that Naruko was indeed a guy and not a frail girl. Sasuke almost smiled. Hesitantly, he sucked Naruto's lower lip and almost shuddered when he felt Naruto gasp, his breath brushing against his skin.

Oh god...

He opened his mouth a little further, taking in Naruto's upper lip as well and using his tongue to trace Naruto's mouth. Because Naruto's mouth was open to begin with, it was not difficult for Sasuke to penetrate. His tongue slid against Naruto's teeth and the hollows of his mouth, taking in every taste, every shape and feature. He slid over Naruto's tongue and went under it, bringing it out, so that they were in-between his and Naruto's mouths. He teased it, poked it, tasted it... Naruto tasted good. No... Naru/ko/ tasted good... No wait... Ah... forget that.

Eventually, a burning sensation in his lung reminded him of the important chore he'd almost forgotten: breathing. Naruto's gasps and obvious attempts at taking in air also served as a gentle reminder. He let go of Naruto's tongue and began licking Naruto's lips, taking in the saliva that had escaped during their little exchange.

This felt nice... Idly, he wondered if Naruto had ever kissed anyone else like this.

Sasuke continued licking and kissing Naruto around his lips and neck.

Suddenly, something that strangely resembled anger and... well... jealousy... enveloped his stomach. What if he /had/? His thoughts flew to Neji. Sasuke didn't believe this was the first time Naruto's ever kissed anyone... and he knew Neji was a straightforward kind of guy who got what he wanted when he wanted it... Naruto wouldn't...

He licked his way down, just below Naruto's jaw.

Why did Sasuke care so much?

He bit him gently, licked the hurt and started sucking. He shuddered when he heard Naruto sound out a throaty, sensual-sounding gasp. Eventually, he let go... and after making sure he had accomplished what he had set out to do, he smirked and left.

X x X

Sasuke stared at the blue sky above him as he lay down at the school roof. Yesterday, upon arriving home and realizing his apparent arousal... he had crashed painfully into reality: he had kissed Naruto... who was a guy/... and actually... /enjoyed it.

Now, originally, Sasuke's plan was to make the boy feel awkward... you know, play with his brains a little. Flirt with him... For one reason or another, he'd started thinking differently about Naruto... particularly when Naruko had started talking to him and... well... very blatantly flirting with him.

Not that he was won over by charm or anything; compared to Sasuke, Naruto was an amateur.

However... he'd... liked talking to Naruto.

Actually... he'd liked it so much that this morning he figured it had all been a dream. However... when he went to check on Naruto and found the hickey he had (quite embarrassingly) left on him... Well... the dream theory flew straight out the window.

He sighed, and rubbed his temple. Something was definitely wrong here.

"You look troubled," a deep voice interrupted his thoughts, "Uchiha-/kun/."

Sasuke sat up to greet Neji who was walking towards him with a knowing smirk. That didn't bode well. Neji was infamous for his "all-knowing eyes". Let's just say the guy was very perceptive. To a fault, even.

"I'm not," Sasuke said nonchalantly. To be honest, he was not in the mood to talk to Neji at the moment.

He might be the one kissing Naruto behind his back or something.

Not that Naruto had anything to do with him at all or anything like that... he was just saying.

"I see you've been visiting our Naruto-/kun/ quite often," he said, leaning against the fence beside Sasuke.

Sasuke looked at him without turning his head. How did he know? Was he following him?

"So," Sasuke said, trying to keep cool. What was Neji's angle here? "That's what you wanted to show me, huh?"

Neji smiled. "Naruto-/kun/ looks rather cute in a dress, don't you think?"

Sasuke started. "How the hell should I know?"

Neji raised an eyebrow. "Well..."

Sasuke stood up and brushed his pants. "Look, it's not like I'm gay or anything... why the hell are you-"

"The way you were kissing him yesterday rather said the opposite."

Sasuke turned around and glared. He was following him...

... or was it Naruto he was following?

"You were... there?"

Neji smiled but didn't say anything.

"That didn't mean anything," Sasuke said, turning around again and walking away. "I was just playing with the idiot. He still thinks I don't know who he is."

"Then," Neji said, his eyes boring into Sasuke's back. "You wouldn't mind my sweeping Naruto off his feet, would you?"

Sasuke stopped in his tracks.

"What?"

Neji chuckled, "Uchiha, here's a tip: don't let your pride take away what will make you happiest."

With that, Neji pushed himself off the fence and walked towards the door. When he was right next to Sasuke, he said, "Unfortunately for me, Naruto-/kun/ has his eyes set on someone else... It's a pity that someone else is an idiot."

Sasuke stared at the fence as Neji's footsteps faded into the background.

X x X

Sasuke smiled to himself as he watched the obviously troubled Naruko frantically cleaning a spot on the counter which she had obviously cleaned at least ten times already. Naruto was troubled - Sasuke momentarily wondered if he had realized that Sasuke knew about his true identity.

He chuckled.

Yeah... right.

Admittedly, playing with the blond had been fun. However... he now knew he had enjoyed it for other reasons. He looked at him. When? When had he started wanting him so much? He thought back to the conversation he had with Neji that afternoon... It was a very... frightening... wake up call.

And no way in hell was he going to let Neji have him.

Sasuke got up and walked over to Naruko. He saw her jump when he opened the bar door. He smiled.

Standing directly behind Naruto, he held him by the waist and pulled him closer and leaned in, breathing on the spot he'd given him the hickey yesterday. When Naruto shuddered, he couldn't help but think how simply adorable it seemed.

"You're good at hiding it, aren't you?"

"Sasuke," Naruto said firmly, still keeping his pitch high. Sasuke almost laughed. The idiot still didn't get it. "Stop it."

He disregarded Naruto's feeble attempt at gaining control of the situation, grabbed his shoulders and turned him around. For a split-second he was lost in those blue eyes again. He shut his own and brought Naruto's lips to his.

He loved the way he tasted.

"Sasuke," Naruto gasped when the Uchiha finally allowed the two of them to breathe, "You need to stop. Please."

Sasuke couldn't help feeling a little annoyed at the blatant pleading and earnestness in Naruto's voice. Was Sasuke the only one being turned on by this? Seriously?

"Why?"

"Because!"

Sasuke laughed. He wasn't letting him go. Hell no.

"Sasuke!"

"I like it when you say my name like that." Desperately... pleadingly...

Sasuke had no idea what a sadist he was. It was a little scary, actually.

Sasuke's lips found themselves along Naruto's jaw - sometimes, he wondered why any of those idiots actually bought Naruto's "disguise" as a girl. He was much too masculine for that - and he half-kissed, half-licked his way down towards Naruto's jugular. He loved the way Naruto shuddered and moved against him... failing miserably to push him away.

As he continued to suck and mark Naruto's neck, he pushed his knee in-between Naruto's legs and let his hands wander. He almost sighed in relief when he realized the other boy wasn't hating this completely - he was as hard as he was. Well, almost. He smirked. His hands held Naruto behind his neck and he pulled him even closer, bucking against him in his instinctive search for more friction.

"Sa-Sasuke-/teme/!" Naruto suddenly shouted. Ah... he finally realized... "How long have you known?!"

Sasuke had to stop. He looked up, letting go of Naruto's neck and stared at him in the eyes. Sasuke laughed. Oh god... Naruto was serious. "What do you take me for, /usuratonkachi/? An idiot?"

Sasuke watched with amusement as those blue eyes grew wide.

"I know those eyes anywhere."

"Y-You...!" Naruto gasped, staring at him. "You're playing with me!"

Sasuke looked at him, a part of him wishing that he indeed was just playing with the clueless blond.

Unfortunately, he wasn't.

"Who said I was playing?"

He pulled Naruto and swallowed any attempt to retaliate or respond.

In truth, the fact that he wasn't playing with him scared him. Just a little.

He leaned in and was obstructed by something hard between his and Naruto's chest, getting slightly irritated/. Must get rid of annoying man-breast now/. Using his right hand to keep Naruto in place, his left hand tugged on Naruko's blouse, setting it free from her skirt. He reached in underneath and skimmed along Naruto's firm abdomen. He chuckled as he felt Naruto's breath catch at the apparently unexpected contact. He continued the slow traversal upward, commenting to himself how completely unlike a woman Naruto was.

He grabbed a ball of sock. He chuckled. /Socks/?!

"Now," he said trying to keep himself from smiling too much, "let's get rid of these socks..."

He wanted to touch him. The socks were just in the way, and they soon found better use keeping the floor company. Naruto gasped into Sasuke's persistent mouth as Sasuke's hands explored his chest, brushing against a nub and bringing it to life.

"/Te-Teme/," Naruto said weakly, "What d'you think you're doing?!"

"Guess, Naruto," he whispered. "It's not too difficult, really."

Naruto moaned as Sasuke massaged a nipple.

"Fuck you, bastard!"

Sasuke paused, and eyed the squirming blond. Not that... what Naruto said gave him any ideas or anything like that...

"What are you staring at, bastard?"

For some strange reason, holding Naruto like this felt... really... natural.

Sasuke smiled.

Owari!
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