Categories > Books > Harry Potter > The Younger Potter Twin

Unspeakables & Lily

by DrT 11 Reviews

The Heir of the Founders, the Heir of Merlin, needs to set the future straight -- by going back to 1971. In this chapter, the Order's next letter.

Category: Harry Potter - Rating: R - Genres: Action/Adventure - Characters: Dumbledore, Flitwick, Harry, Lily, Lupin, Voldemort - Warnings: [!!] - Published: 2006/11/25 - Updated: 2006/11/25 - 3555 words

Reviews

  • The Younger Potter Twin

    (#) Nautilus 2006-11-25 05:40:51 AM

    this is by far one of the best political stories i have read. and its just getting started... i look forward to acutally seeing what the magical community do about all this, even if the ministry is too stupid, what about the creatures and the general public. are they truely just sheep.

    so far, i haven't seen the founders openly go against anyone besides the ministry and voldy. so far, all creatures and magicial being, whether they be faries or dark creatures all seem to be accepted... look forward to how far you take this, and until what point we start seeing some action... congrats....

    i like the personal side story with James, Harry, Remus and Lily as well, its seen fun and like an actual childhood. congrats again, update soon.
  • The Younger Potter Twin

    (#) sparky40sw 2006-11-25 06:25:28 AM

    fabulous chapter - Hoiw do you write so well so quickly? love the call to revolution - the Magical society you describe definitely needs a god shake up and reform. Thanks so much for sharing, it is deeply appreciated.
    Warm regards
    Ken

    Author's response

    The story (in draft) was finished before I started posting, unlike 'Re-Ordered'. There, I can't post too much, as I need to go back and change things as the story develops, other wise it might end up like 'the Year of Rebellion', where you had to keep going back and reading after every new chapter to see what had changed in the earlier chapters.

    "T"
  • The Younger Potter Twin

    (#) banner 2006-11-25 06:37:01 AM

    Perceptive as always, with an unflinchingly analytical view of the weakest points of Wizarding Britain's government...

    Author's response

    Glad you liked it, because there's a lot about the changing society in the story.

    "T"
  • The Younger Potter Twin

    (#) Skoell 2006-11-25 06:47:02 AM

    great chapter, again i can't rate because it is already too good rated...

    how far will this story go? until henry/harry's seventh year? until riddle is dead? until government has been thrown over? can you at least give an estimated idea how long harry will be in the past?

    will harry stay alone? or will he eventually find a girl for him? in earlier chapters you had some mentions of narcissa, but nothing came from it until now...will that change or was it some other idea?

    Author's response

    Most of your questions have been answered in previous reviews. There will be 17 chapters, going through the August right before the start of this Harry's 2nd year. He's 'stuck' in this time stream and cannot 'go back'. The 2nd part of chapter 17 shows 'the future' (June, 1998). Harry's mum will arrange a marriage for him, to give him some emotional stability. (Certainly NOT Narcissa, although if I had matched Harry and Lily, I might have matched James and Narcissa).

    "T"
  • The Younger Potter Twin

    (#) Toto 2006-11-25 07:03:36 AM

    yosh, quite good. Now i just have to wonder what is Lily doing about that... and how far this harry is going to manage things :-)
  • The Younger Potter Twin

    (#) Jimm 2006-11-25 07:21:01 AM

    Sooo, 25k words into a story marked 'Drama, Romance'... Unless it's going to be Lily, I'm still wondering who the love interest is going to be me. :-)

    Good chapter, thanks for sharing it with us.
  • The Younger Potter Twin

    (#) Shaggy37 2006-11-25 09:05:49 AM

    OUTSTANDING CHAPTER!!!! I can't wait to see what happens next. I agree with what you've written about the ministry they have only done what is wrong, though they are beyond incompetent they're just moronic. DO keep up the outstanding work and update soon please:):):):)
  • The Younger Potter Twin

    (#) spacedout 2006-11-25 10:04:57 AM

    I like the idea of the story. However, some of the plot points you've mentioned are a little dodgy, a few chappies ago you mentioned that only in Europe were there dark lords... That concept is colouring your story in a negative way, humans all over the world have always had the potential for great evil. From Hitler to Mao to the current GW Bush, in the name of power and control all humans are capable of evil. So too would all wizards, after all neither they nor we are gods (and if you've read the entire bible, god too has done some pretty evil stuff.) Although a meritocracy has been a better way of doing things than the traditional corrupt forms of govenrment, it also allows the most competent evil person to rise into positions of power as well as the good people...
    The main flaw in your plot is the number of people hp is murdering, there is a big diff between someone who kills in defence of self, or others, and someone who plots and brings about the death of another. Yes, even if it can be said that that individual deserves to die. The story you're writing is a fictionalized account of a revolution, the sweeping away of an old order to bring about a new one. To improve your story you'll have to explain how this hp is going to avoid the excesses of what happened when the muggle gov't's/societies did the same; Examples given, the Russian Revolution (which pooched the economy of the ussr, and killed at least 50 million people in the name of comunism), The French Revolution (which also pooched the world economy, killed who knows how many people, and collapsed into a state of perpetual war).
    If your harry succeeds in overthrowing the govt and offing this voldy early how is he going to prevent anarchy in magical europe? Should your answer be that democracy will solve all of their woes, I will have to remind you that the democracy brought to Iraq (at the point of a gun, really just colonialism reborn...) has killed and tortured more people in less time than Saddam could have. As far as the success of the US revolution goes... Explain again how is it that GW bush can claim to be an elected president???
  • The Younger Potter Twin

    (#) whatareyouevensaying 2006-11-25 08:18:03 PM

    Can't wait to see how the Ministry responds to that one. They'll probably attempt to arrest everyone who isn't a Death Eater and give them Veritaserum in an attempt to discover the Order. How's that for convoluted logic?

    More, please.
  • The Younger Potter Twin

    (#) Dragen 2006-11-28 08:14:05 AM

    What another great chapter; I can't wait to see what the The Order of Founders do next, I wonder who is helping Harry to do what is right.

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