"My eyes see what my mind wants it too."
I coarsely turned my glance to his quivering lips, just night mummers I placed. He ceased to continue in his speech, my assumption was correct. As I began to pull back my own blankets the house made a low shutter from the slandering wind. It had picked up shortly after dinner was ordered. Climbing deeply into my bed I stared up to my mirrored ceiling. I locked eye's with my reflection and kept sight; pleading with my pupils not to let me see too much of the dark room. Scared, hardly. I preferred to see shadow's; pretending that something may hide in them excited the very core of me. Again the house shuttered. I rolled to my side and closed my eyes manually. I heard low whispering; opening my eyes I scanned around. The room lay quiet and still. Shutting my eyes again sleep took me quickly.
The voice was close to my ear, I wanted to find it but my sight had gone. It called my name again and again. I flew my hands around me trying to touch something, something to guide me. My name came more frequently with a frighten tone to follow it.
"What!" I yelled.
Dim light filled my sight ironically. Glancing around quickly I noticed my posture was no longer that of someone laying down. I was standing squarely in the middle of my somewhat large room. Turning to the voice I realized it had been many. My band stood a few yards from me. They stood stiff and sheet white.
"Are," he paused, "Are you okay?"
I looked down to my chest to see what they had been staring so intricately towards. Fresh scraps lay sliced into skin and seemly looked as though they were self inflicted. My hands began to shake violently as they lifted themselves to touch my wounds.
"What the hell happened?" I whispered loudly.
They shrugged frigidly in unison. I dropped to knees holding my chest; it began to scream with pain. Mikey ran to my side and tried to calm me.
"Shh it's okay," he soothed
I slanted into his side and shakily wrapped my arms around his neck; gritting my teeth and breathing in short heeded breaths. He half hugged me keeping one hand free to rub my cold sweating back. Ray and Bob had left the room to gather some blankets, while Frank came to my side with a damp towel. Wiping at my sores I dug my nails into Mikey's skin. The shearing pain locked into my spine causing a chain reaction throughout my body. My brother winced
as my nails dug deeper; I tried to loosen the grip but my hands would not obey.
"They keep bleeding," Frank shivered.
"Gerard what did you do?"
"I don't know Mikey."
I knew they thought I had done this to myself. How would I explain this to them when I couldn't even do it to my own self. Ray and Bob entered hastily and began to wrap me in a large down duvet. Frank helped Mikey as they pride my fingers from his neck. I shook harder as Ray uneasily picked me up. My weight had yo-yoed alot but I wasn't as heavy as earlier years. Ray seemed to stumble under me and failed at a light dumping. It was as though something pushed down on him while he had carried me. I lay in my bed staring at my friends as they tucked me in.
"Try and get some sleep Gerard," Bob spoke lowly; squeezing my shoulder tightly.
I looked up.
"I think he's just reacting badly to the Chinese food."
"Yeah but if that's the case, why carve up your skin?"
"He does have a temperature."
"But...I dunno, what happened Frank?"
"I was just asleep and then I hear him giggling, next thing I know he's in the middle of the room...thats when I got you guys."
They all turned to watch my darting eyes.
"We better talk about this in the morning, I'm going to bed."
Everyone except Frank excited the room. He stood aways from my bed staring at me. I continued to watch the ceiling. The time passed slowly inching away, crawling backwards even. He stood still, watching, waiting. To humor him I closed my eyes; and heard his footsteps move away stopping as he climbed on the couch. The whispering returned; I stayed awake to catch something the voices were saying.