Gerard finds Rachel after she tells him her feelings And Rachel and Gerard get a bit "close" ;)
But hopefully you'll like it...
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As I continued to run my way to the lake, I felt hot tears stream down my face. Everything that had happened in the last six months was really starting to take it's toll.
I was the type of person that bottles everything up, and doesn't like to talk about the situation. I was the type of person that pretended everything was okay, when it really wasn't. Which is probably a bad thing for me to do, but that's just how I deal with things I guess.
After I finally reached the lake I sat under a tall tree and brought my knees up to my chest. I then let it all go; I balled my eyes out.
I sat there for about five minutes, a little calmer than before, when I saw Gerard slowly and reluctantly making his way over towards me.
I buried my face in my knees and pretended he wasn't there.
He sat down beside me and put a hand on my shoulder, I jerked it away and mumbled: "I don't want to talk to you... Go away!"
"What's wrong?" He whispered caringly.
"HA! What's wrong?! WHAT'S WRONG?! I'LL FUCKING TELL YOU WHAT'S WRONG!" I shouted, looking up at Gerard with tears still in my eyes.
"EVERYTHING! That's what's wrong! I'm sick of my life, I'm sick of school! And I'm sick of YOU acting like one of the most arrogant bastards I have met in ages!" I screamed, tears starting to well up in my eyes again.
"What do you mean?" Gerard asked calmly.
"What do I mean about what?! The "I hate my life"? Or the "You're an arrogant prick?!" I yelled at him.
"Both?" Gerard said quietly.
"Well, I'm sick of life, I'm sick of trying! I can't be fucked anymore! I don't care if I fail at school. They give as so much fucking work, I just can't be bothered doing it anymore! I don't give a fuck!
I don't care if my family hates me, and I certainly don't give a shit if I'm wasting my time, because life isn't worth living anyway!
I've gotten to the point were I don't want to wake up anymore!" I explained very loudly.
"Why do you feel like that Rachel? This isn't like you..." Gerard said in a worried tone.
"See, and that's where YOU come in... These past few months, you've been off with "Kara", and couldn't give a care about your friends anymore. NO! We're not THAT important are we?!
But while I've been secretly dying inside, you've been off with that WHORE, not really noticing what was really happening to the people around you!" I explained, crying once again.
"I, have had soo much shit thrown at me these last few months, and I don't know what to do anymore!
I'm sick of pretending everything is okay, when it's really not!
Like for instance. They put on a happy face when people are around, but when those doors fucking close, that's when the truth comes out!
And who's the one that has to break them apart time and time again?! Who's the one that has to LOCK their brother in a room so he doesn't see what really goes on!? ME OF COURSE!..." I screamed, throwing my arms about in a crazy frantic way.
Gerard sat there in total silence, not knowing what to say or do.
"I can't keep pretending everything's ok. I'm sick of pretending... I can't handle it anymore..." I sobbed, tears flowing freely out of my eyes.
Gerard put an arm around me and pulled me close to him, stroking my arm softly.
"Why are you doing this? Why are you acting the complete opposite to yourself?" I questioned softly, not really knowing if he heard me.
"I have no idea..." He whispered, still stroking my arm.
"Do you know how hard it's been for Mikey to not have his big brother around as much anymore? To not be able to talk to him like he used to? When he needed him the most? Because of who you've become?
Do you know how hard it is for the group? To be totally ignored completely, like we're not good enough for you?
And how do you think it's been for me?! To lose my best friend?!" I said sadly.
I looked up at Gerard and saw him staring up ahead. I wiped my tears away with my sleeve and continued to look at him.
He then realized my staring and looked at me. I smiled weakly and put my head back down against his shoulder. Gerard then gently placed his hand under my chin and lifted my head until I was looking straight into his eyes. We sat like that for a while, just staring into each others eyes dreamingly.
I then closed my eyes gently when I felt his soft lips being placed on mine. We stayed like that for a little while, before Gerard broke the kiss, taking a chance to breathe.
Gerard smiled and leant in again, pressing his lips roughly on mine. He gently licked my lips, asking for entrance into my mouth. I parted my lips slightly, and Gerard slowly slipped his tongue into my mouth. I brought my arms up, and wrapped them around Gerard's neck, deepening the kiss. Gerard followed my lead and gently placed his hands on my hips, deepening the kiss even more.
I then broke the kiss, gasping for air. I then gently pecked his lips and leant my forehead against his.
"You're not gonna get up and run this time, are you?" Gerard asked sarcastically, smiling.
I shook my head.
"Nope, don't plan to this time..." I muttered, kissing his cheek.
I leant in again and kissed him passionately. Gerard still had his hands on my hips, but he slowly began to slide his cold hand under my shirt.
"Cold!" I whispered, and Gerard giggled.
Gerard began to kiss me again until I mumbled something against his lips. He pulled back and laughed.
"Sorry, I didn't quite catch that!" He said smiling.
I smiled and looked away.
"I said, what are we doing?" I asked.
He looked at me with a confused expression on his face.
"What do you mean?" Gerard asked, still confused.
"I mean, with all the shit that's happened these last few, few months, you can't just all of a sudden start acting like this towards me! And what about Kara?!" I said.
"Well, honestly, I've liked you for a while now. But, I guess I've never really had the guts to admit it..." Gerard said quietly, looking down.
"So what was Kara? A few months of fun?!" I asked.
"I don't really know...I mean, I like her... I just thought, that if I went out with someone else, that the feelings I have towards you would go away..." He explained softly.
"Why would you want those feelings to go away?" I asked seriously.
"Well, maybe because you're my best friend. And, I dunno. It's not natural for a friend to see their best friend in that way!" Gerard explained, looking up across the water.
"You were afraid that it'd fuck everything up? Like friendship wise?" I asked quietly.
"...Yeah..." Gerard whispered.
"Well, don't worry." I said, placing my hand on top of his.
"I thought that as well. When I realized all of my feelings, I freaked out. Even ask Scarlet!" I laughed.
"But then I just gave up. Dealt with my feelings, I'll be honest, I tried to block them, but... yeah..." I sighed.
"So... What now?" Gerard asked.
I looked up at him and smiled weakly and shrugged.
"That's kinda up to you..." I said while looking into his eyes.
Gerard smiled and gently stroked my cheek.
"I'm going to break up with Kara tomorrow, and we can work from there?" He suggested.
"If that's what you want..." I whispered.
Gerard smiled again and gently kissed my lips. I pulled back and stood up.
"Where are you going?" Gerard asked, still sitting down.
"Home." I answered.
"Why home? Can't you come back to my place?" Gerard suggested.
"Umm... Everyone is most likely still going to be there, and Kara's probably still going to be there..." I stated.
"Yeah, she's staying tonight." Gerard said.
"Oh..." I said shocked.
"But don't worry!" Gerard reassured, standing up.
"What have I got to worry about?!" I screamed sarcastically.
Gerard shrugged and began to walk, I followed him and began to walk as well.
"Another reason which adds to my reason that I just said then, the why I can't exactly go back there tonight... I kinda bashed Kara, and she'll be pissed, and so will everyone else. She's the "popular one"." I said sarcastically.
"But why would you care if everyone's pissed at you?" Gerard asked as we continued to walk.
"Well, it doesn't really bother me... It's the fact that everyone's got some sort of alcohol in their system... So, things could get out of hand... I don't really want anymore injuries..." I smiled.
"Oh, I see! Maybe we SHOULD keep you away. Don't want anyone else thrown against the wall!" Gerard laughed.
"Oh come on! It was one fucking time, and she deserved it!" I screamed while throwing my arms up in the air.
"Yeah, well. I'm not all that happy about it. I mean, I do kinda like her... and she is still my girlfriend..." Gerard pointed out.
"Why do you like her?" I sighed.
"I'm not sure... She's just, nice I guess..." Gerard said.
"HA! Oh my god, you're kidding me right?!" I laughed.
"Umm... No..." Gerard said, confused.
"Oh. Oh, ok... I'll shut up now." I whispered, still giggling when the conversation died.
We silently walked back to Gerard's house. Making awkward small talk until we finally got there.
As we walked down the long, windy driveway. I saw Frank, Mikey, Ray, Scarlet, Tegan, Ashley and Lily all sitting on the steps, looking very bored.
They must have seen me, because they were yelling things I couldn't understand, and Scarlet had gotten up and started running towards me.
"YOU! YOU WANNA FUCKING EXPLAIN WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED JUST BEFORE?!" Frank screamed at me as he made his way over towards us.
"Oh, haven't I got a story for you?!" I screamed sarcastically.
"How long was I gone for?" I asked.
"Ah, about half an hour... Maybe?" Mikey answered.
"Well. I think we might be going to my place now. You coming Mikes?" I said.
"Nah, I'll stay here I think. But I'll come stop by tomorrow. That alright?" Mikey answered.
"Yep! Course it is! You better come!" I said excitedly.
"I'm gonna go inside and see if Kara's ok. I'll see you sometime tomorrow?" Gerard whispered.
"Yeah, go... I'll text you later..." I whispered back.
Gerard then said goodbye to us and walked into the house, catching my glance as he did so.
"So Frank, you gots all the ladies tonight..." Mikey said while elbowing Frank's side and smiling cheekily.
"YOU'RE IN!!" Ray screamed as he put Frank in a head lock.
We all laughed, even Frank as he struggled to free himself from Ray's grasp.
"Ok, we're going now. See you guys tomorrow." I said as I hugged Ray and Mikey.
"Alright, I'll call you before we leave." Mikey said.
"Have fun Frankie!..." Ray teased, winking and nudging Frank.
As we turned and left, we all giggled and teased Frank.
When we got to my house, Dad was still up, in the garage.
"Oh, didn't expect you guys back here till at least three!" My dad teased as we walked into the garage.
"Ha, well, Rachel kinda bashed Gerard's girlfriend, a.k.a, the "popular, life of the party" so, that kinda cut our partying short..." Ashley stated.
"Really? Hope you had a good reason..." Dad said, raising his eyebrow, a very serious look on his face.
"Umm... Kinda." I said, smiling innocently.
"We'll talk about it tomorrow..." My Dad told me before turning away.
I knew not to argue, so I turned away towards the house.
I heard the others behind me scurry to catch up.
"Did I get you in trouble?" Ashley whispered.
"No, probably not. They'll just have a talk to me, and tell me about how "violence isn't the answer"." I said, while turning the door handle slowly and carefully.
I sighed as I stepped into the warm house. Not really wanting to be there.
Gerard was the first one that I kinda told about my problems, I hinted a few things to Scarlet, but never told her the whole story. But then again, I never told Gerard the whole story either...
I decided that I was going to wait a little bit before I told anyone about what happened between Gerard and I at the lake.
The next day we were all sitting outside on my verandah.
"So, I didn't have the chance to ask you last night. Was it Gerard that ran after you?" Scarlet asked, making everyone fall silent and look at me.
"Run after me when?" I asked, playing dumb.
"Aww, I think you know... Right after you punched the living shit out of Kara." Scarlet said.
"Which reminds ME, you need to tell us the story of how all that got started." Frank said, butting in.
"Well, she just came up to me and started saying all this shit about Gerard, about how she's using him and stuff like that. And I had had enough, so I hit her." I explained.
"Well that kinda clears THAT up!" Lily added.
"Woo! Go Rachel!" Tegan shouted while patting me on the back.
"It's about time someone had the guts to hit the son of a bitch..." Ashley mumbled.
"Yes, but I can't help but think you're avoiding something." Scarlet said, smiling at me.
"Avoiding what?" I asked innocently.
"Gerard did run after you after you hit Kara didn't he?" Scarlet asked.
"...Yeah..." I answered.
"Did something happen after slash, while slash, during he ran after you?" Scarlet asked suspiciously.
"Maybe..." I said in a sarcastic tone.
"Care to tell us what?" Scarlet asked sarcastically.
I sighed and opened my mouth to talk when my phone started vibrating beside me. I smiled and picked it up.
"Oh, you've got to be kidding me?!" Scarlet screamed.
"WE WERE ABOUT TO GET SOMETHING OUT OF HER!!" Scarlet squealed at the phone before I answered.
"Hello?" I said.
"Rachel! What up?" Ray responded on the other end of the phone.
"Nothing much, what you's up to?" I asked, smiling at how I could use this conversation to buy more time.
I wasn't quite sure if I wanted to tell everyone yet about what happened the night before. And to be honest, I wasn't entirely sure what had happened.
"Ah, we're just making our way over to your place..." Ray said like he was really bored.
"WE'LL SEE YOU SOON RACHEL!" I heard Mikey scream.
I laughed and looked up ahead, and noticed a very small Mikey and Ray walking down my driveway.
"RAY! MIKEY!" Frank squealed and jumped up and ran towards them.
I laughed again, hung up the phone and hopped up.
We all made our way over to them, and Ray shoved me.
"WHAT WAS THAT FOR?!" I screamed.
"That, missy. Was for hanging up on me!" Ray shouted.
"But you were basically right in front of me! What was the point of continuing the conversation and wasting money?!" I screamed as we stared to walk again.
"Hmm... Good point!" Ray said, laughing.
We walked over to our spots we were before Ray and Mikey came, and started talking.
"Well thank you Ray and Mikey, I was this close to getting something out of Rachel, and you's just had to come and interrupt everything!" Scarlet said, folding her arms across her chest.
"Oooo, what were you trying to get out of her? Anything good?!" Mikey said excitedly, leaning in closer.
"I think you might find interest. It does involve your brother..." Scarlet said smiling and looking at me.
Everyone then stopped talking and stared at me.
"Umm... This is your cue for you to tell us what happened..." Frank whispered nudging me in the sides.
"What if I told you nothing happened?" I asked.
"Then you would be lying. Now just shut up, stop avoiding it, and tell us what the hell happened!" Lily said loudly.
"We kissed." I sighed, looking away.
Frank, Mikey and Ray all gasped, as Scarlet, Tegan, Ashley and Lily all squealed.
"OMG, really?!" Tegan squealed.
"Tell us more!" Ashley squealed.
"Nothing more to tell!" I shot, looking away once again.
"No, there's more. I know you Rachel. There's A LOT more to it than you are telling us." Scarlet said.
"Tell us ALL the details!" Mikey said.
"The WHOLE thing?!" I squealed.
"YES! The WHOLE thing!" Mikey huffed.
"Everything from the him running after you, to you and him coming back together." Frank added in with a cheeky smile.
I sighed and laughed awkwardly.
"Ok, but I'm warning you. You guys wanted to know, so I'm not responsible for any unwanted details..." I said quietly.
"My god! You guys didn't have sex did you?!" Mikey squealed.
I looked around quickly and hit Mikey's arm.
"No! We didn't!" I hissed at him.
They all fell silent, waiting for me to begin. There was no way I was getting out of this...
"Ok, so I walked slash, ran off. And Gerard walked slash ran after me. And we sorta ended up in a screaming match, and I let something slip, and I ran off again. Then Ger-" I started.
"What thing did you let slip?" Scarlet asked curiously.
"That I ah... Love him..." I stuttered.
This time everyone gasped and fell silent.
"Is it true?" Ray asked quietly.
"...Yes..." I whispered, looking down at my feet.
This time everyone squealed, including the guys.
"ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS?! THAT'S AWSOME!!" Mikey excitedly screamed, picking me up and twirling me around.
"Since when have you "loved" him?" Frank asked after everyone had calmed down.
"I only realized recently." I said.
"How long recently?" Lily asked.
"About, two, three weeks recently..." I answered.
"How do you know?" Mikey asked.
"I just know I guess..." I shrugged.
"...So, we were up to the "I love you Gerard" part..." Ashley said, wanting to find out every detail.
"So I ran after that, to the lake." I said.
"Ha! Cause we didn't see that coming!" Tegan shouted.
The others turned their heads around and evilly glared at Tegan. Tegan apologized, and I went on.
"I started crying, and Gerard came and found me. Then I started going off at him, and I dunno. One thing lead to another, and it just happened I guess..." I finished quietly.
"Who kissed who?" Ray asked curiously.
Frank and Mikey looked at Ray in a weird kind of way.
"WHAT?! Oh, and like you don't want to know yourselves!" Ray defended.
"He kissed me..." I answered.
"He a good kisser?" Lily asked.
"OH!" Mikey squealed.
We all laughed.
"Yes, he is. A VERY good kisser..." I said, teasing a now freaking Mikey.
"I don't want to know! I don't want to know!" Mikey squealed, shielding his face with his arms.
We all laughed again, and helped Mikey calm down, still laughing in the process.
"So is that all?" Scarlet asked suspiciously.
"No..." I replied.
"Oh god, he didn't fondle you did he?!" Mikey squealed, freaking out once again.
We all started laughing again.
"Who uses the word "fondle" these days?!" Frank laughed before Mikey hit him in the back of the head.
"No, he didn't "fondle" me..." I laughed.
"He just said that he's going to break up with Kara today, and we'll see what will happens from there..." I said.
The others stopped laughing instantly and glared at me.
"Are you serious?" Mikey whispered.
I nodded my head and raised my eyebrow.
"THANK FUCKING GOD! There's two ways that makes that really, really awesome. 1, he's finally breaking up with that dumb mole.
2, you two might finally get together!" Mikey shouted.
"Well, nothings certain yet." I pointed out.
"Do you think he was telling the truth? Do you think he'll really break up with her?" Ray asked.
"Well. I hope so..." I said.
"What will happen if he does then?" Frank said.
"Whatever happens, happens I guess." I shrugged.
About an hour and a half later after my "confession". We were still sitting on the verandah, and had avoided our previous conversation. We were now talking about other worthless crap, when my phone started vibrating.
I picked it up and saw it was a text message from Gerard. It said that he needed to talk to me, and that he'll be over at my place soon. I smiled as I read it, and closed my phone.
"Who was that?" Scarlet asked.
"Gerard." I said smiling.
"Oooo... Look at her! She's blushing!" Tegan teased.
"Rachel loves Gerard, Rachel loves Gerard, Rachel loves Gerard!" Mikey chanted, before everyone decided to join in.
"What did he say?" Ray asked as he stuffed his face with chips.
"That he'll be here soon..." I replied.
"Are you two gonna talk?" Scarlet teased.
"Yeah, probably." I said, choosing to ignore the teasing comments they were all making.
About ten minutes later, Gerard showed up. Frank, Ray, Mikey, Scarlet, Lily, Tegan and Ashley all said very happy hellos as Gerard walked up and grabbed my arm.
"I need to talk you..." He whispered as he dragged me away from our friends.
As we got further and further away, I could hear them cheering and screaming...
I don't really like this chapter, i do but i don't...
i like the whole plot/idea, but not the way i've set it out :(
So tell me what you think, and rate please. I'd be ever so grateful!