FicWad

Several weeks went by and the travel was starting to get to me. Hell, everything was starting to get to me. Each night I slept in Gerard’s bunk, touching his body and feeling his need. His arm would encircle me and pull me close but nothing would happen and I mean nothing. Not one damn thing. We hadn’t had sex since that night at the bed and breakfast and fuck it I was feeling the loss. We hadn’t spoken to each other on a personal level since the night of the double date with Mikey and Alicia. The night I had thought had been so wonderful. The night that he had told me the whole evening had been an act. It was like he had totally turned himself off and was on autopilot. The Gerard who smiled and answered questions correctly had taken over. The real Gerard had been buried.
I had just finished setting up the Meet and Greet for tonight and was on my way back to the bus. I saw Bob walking towards me. “Hey Laura, Gerard’s looking for you.”
I stopped and smiled at him. “Okay thanks, Bob. He’s on the bus?’ I guessed.
Bob nodded, “Yeah, We just got back from an interview.” He paused and I could tell he wanted to say more.
“And?”
“Oh nothing, just make sure you find him, okay? He’ll tell you.” He walked away.
I had felt like telling him that I highly doubted that Gerard would tell me jack shit. The guy wasn’t really talking to me. The sun was hot as I crossed the parking lot. I sighed happily when I reached the air-conditioning of the bus.
“Laura” Gerard said looking up from his seat on the sofa. “I was looking for you.”
“Bob told me” I said trying to sound uninterested, “What’s up?”
He reached into his messenger bag and pulled something out. “Here, put this on.” He tossed a small box at me which I caught in mid-air.
I was shocked to see it was a jewelers box. Flipping it open I saw it contained a gold ring. A simple gold band that caused me to look at him questioningly.
“I don’t give a shit if it hasn’t been very long since I broke up with Eve. In the interview today I said that I had met someone special. I got us matching rings.” He held up his hand so I could see the ring that he was wearing.
I was suddenly hit with a feeling of sadness. Shit, I wanted this ring to really mean something but I knew it was just for show. I took it out and slipped it on my finger.
“Don’t like it?” He asked watching me.
“It’s fine.” I replied. I walked over to him and sat down. “There is something I need to tell you. I know us getting married it just like a business arrangement.” I paused then blurted out. “Just know I can’t have kids so if you ever want to have a child you’re gonna have to find someone else.”
I looked over to see him looking bored. “I know that you can’t have kids. Do you really think I would have been having unprotected sex with you all this time if I hadn’t known you were disease free and unable to get pregnant?”
Shit, this guy could make me go from nice to bitch in no time flat. “How the fuck would you know that?’
“Laura, I made it my business to know everything about you. I know you had yourself tested after you found out Alan had been unfaithful. Your best friend is how I know about your medial problems that prevent you from having children.”
“Alicia told you?” I was shocked
“Technically she told her husband but what he knows I know.”
I glared at him. “And how do you know about the results of my tests?”
He simply stared into my eyes, “Offer the right person the right amount of money and there is nothing you can’t find out.”
I had quite an un-ladylike comment for him but Bob walked on to the bus at that moment. He noticed I was wearing the ring and smiled, “I went with him to pick them out.”
I faked a smiled for him. The guy was genuinely nice and I wondered how much he knew about the real relationship Gerard and I shared.
Gerard stood, “I gotta check on some shit.” As he walked past me he briefly kissed my lips “See ya later.”
I must have been frowning as I watched him walk off the bus. “Laura, are you okay?” Bob asked.
I nodded “Yeah, I’m fine.” I started toward the bunk area of the bus.
“Laura” Bob called to me, “He was happy when he was picking out the rings.”
I shrugged. Gerard was a fucking wonderful actor. I was sure he had been putting on a good show.
“It wasn’t an act.” Bob said as if he could read my mind. “He really was happy.”

As I stood watching the group take their places for the Meet and Greet Alicia walked up to me. “Hey heard you got a ring.”
I held up my hand slightly not wanting to draw the attention of the fans in the room.
“I was shocked as fuck when he mentioned finding someone special in the interview this morning. Did you know he was gonna announce it?” Alicia asked.
I saw Gerard talking to a young fan who had handed him a picture she had drawn for him. He smiled and I could tell he was praising her work. “I had no idea.” I answered looking over at her.
“Hey, Gee is motioning for you, I think.” Alicia said. I looked and saw that she was right.
“Laura.” Gerard said my name. Fuck, talk about feeling strange. All the faces in the room were looking at me. I smiled and walked over.
Gerard took my hand as I stepped up beside him. “This is Laura my fiancée.” He told the young girl.
“Oh hi” the girl gushed.
Gerard turned to me. “She noticed my ring and asked me about it.”
I smiled slightly not knowing what else to do. Luckily Tara my assistant got the line of fans moving again. I tried to pull my hand away from Gerard so I could fade into the background. He pulled me down so he could whisper in my ear, “Try not to look like being engaged to me is a fucking death sentence.”
I pasted a smile on my face as I stood, “As you wish”

I was sure Gerard’s mood wouldn’t be good after the concert. Man, was I right. He stormed on to the bus. “We need to talk “
I could hear the rest of the guys coming up the steps behind him. He walked over and pulled me to my feet. As soon as everyone had passed us and were on the bus he started to pull me down the steps.
“Where are you going?” Ray asked.
Gerard turned to him, “Laura and I are going for a walk.”
“We’re pulling out soon.” Ray reminded him.
“No shit.” Gerard answered sarcastically.
Ray looked over at me. “Laura, you all right?’
I was surprised by the question. Gerard let go of my hand and took a step back. I looked at him then back to Ray. “Sure, I’m fine. We’ll be back soon.” I turned and followed Gerard off the bus.
We had only walked a short distance when he began speaking, “Look I need to know if you’ve changed your mind.”
I knew what he was talking about but couldn’t help poking a stick at him, “About what?”
“Cut the shit Laura. You know what I’m asking.” We walked over to the area behind the arena, away from all the chaos that was taking place as everyone prepared to move on to the next venue.
“Sorry, I’m just not a seasoned actor like you. I was caught off guard today. Maybe you should have told me you were planning on announcing our engagement.”
He leaned against the wall of the arena and lit a cigarette. He handed me one and lit another for himself. He took a deep drag before speaking, “I was fucking tired of waiting.”
“Why?” I leaned against the wall next to him.
He glared at me. “It’s just easier if we can be seen in public.”
“Is that really the reason?” I said looking over at him. “Or do you need the security of having a fiancée so when people question your preferences the fact that you have a fiancée quiets some of the questions?”
He took another drag off his cigarette then tossed it away. “Does it matter?”
I tossed my own cigarette away. “Not one fucking bit. I’ll try to be a better actress Gerard.” I pushed myself off the wall intent on returning to the bus. He grabbed my arm and pulled me to him roughly.
“Come on little Laura. It’s not that bad really.” He ran his hands up under my shirt. “I thought you liked what we have.”
“Oh, you mean what we had. It’s been over two weeks, Gerard.” I shot back.
He pressed his lower body to mine then turned me around so that my back was to the wall. “Could have just said ‘fuck me Gerard’ and I would have done it.”
“Fuck off Gerard.” I said angrily. I tried to push past him. He grabbed my hands and held them against the wall. His body had me pinned. I could feel how hard he was. “Say it.” He demanded.
“No”
His lips latched on to my neck. “Say it.” His breath was coming faster.
I was determined, “No.”
His muffled voice was rough, “Fine than I’ll say it. Fuck me Laura.” When his lips reached mine I thrust my tongue into this mouth.
“We don’t have much time.” He said breaking away and pulling me further into the shadows. Suddenly we were both pulling on each other’s clothes. He lifted my shirt and pushed up my bra. His mouth began sucking at my nipples. My hands had lowered the zipper and were searching for his penis. We fell to the ground. The pavement was painful to my back. Gerard noticed and rolled us over so that I was on top. The need to have him was overpowering. I shimmed out of my sweats just enough so that I could position myself over him. One thrust and I sank down on to his rock hard length.
“Fuck” he cried out.
The danger of being discovered only added to the frenzy. I moved up and down on him letting the tension build. His hands cradled my ass.
“Fuck me Laura.” He said in a hoarse whisper. “Fuck me like it’s really what you want.”
“It is what I really want.” I whispered back. “Believe me, it’s what I want.”
My words seemed to affect him on some deep level. He began to meet me with his own deep thrusts. He cried out my name as he came, filling me. I tightened my self around him and let go. The feeling was so intense it brought tears to my eyes.
“Did I hurt you?” his voice shocked me. He sounded frightened.
I collapsed against him trying to let me heart rate slow. “Of course not. It was just so intense.”
He put his arms around me, “Your not lying are you?”
I raised myself up to look in his face. What I saw there shocked me. He looked confused. “Tears of happiness.” I said trying to make him understand. I was about to say more when I heard voices. I leaped to my feet and fixed my clothing. Gerard did the same. When we were both presentable we began to walk back towards the bus. I couldn’t believe it when he reached over and took my hand in his.
“There you are.” Mikey said spotting us. “The bus is ready to pull out.”
There three of us moved towards the bus. “Who were you talking to?” I asked Mikey. I know I had heard more than one voice.
“One of the merch guys. I think his name is Troy. He was looking for Gerard too.”
I pulled my hand out of Gerard’s grip. Troy was the man Gerard had walked out of the shadows with a few weeks ago. Several times I had spotted them together and had made it my business to learn all I could about Troy.
Gerard looked over at me and smiled. Mikey went on to the bus first. I turned to Gerard; “So Troy was your back up fuck for tonight?”
I saw anger flash in his eyes. “He’s a friend, Laura, nothing more.”
I hadn’t expected him to tell me that. I didn’t think he would lie. Especially since he seemed to enjoy telling me thing that upset me. I gave him a final look and walked into the bus. Ray was standing at the top of the steps. He looked angry but not at me at Gerard.
“We needed to take off ten minutes ago.” He told him. The others on the bus all looked uncomfortable.
Gerard nodded, “Sorry. Laura and I were talking.”
“You are Laura were fucking.” Ray spat back at him. “Ever notice how your fucking affects us all?”
“Ray” Mikey said sharply.
“Dude, come on. It’s no big deal.” Bob said walking over to Ray.
I looked over to see that Gerard had lowered his head. “Yeah, I know” he answered.
Frank seemed to talk charge. “Okay enough drama. We gotta get going.”
Everyone began to move towards their bunks. The drive would take all night to reach the next venue. I reached out and took Gerard’s hand. “Come on lets go to bed.” I said softly. He followed me without a word to our bunk. He sat and waited as I slipped into my PJ pants and Tee then got under the covers. He went to change into his nightclothes. Tonight when he got into bed instead of laying on his side and pulling me to him he laid on his back. I rolled over, put my arm around him and laid my head on his chest. I could feel his body stiffen at first but he finally relaxed.
“Goodnight” I whispered.
His hand came up and stroked my hair once before falling back down at his side. “Goodnight little Laura” he whispered back. His hand reached up again this time his fingers touched the ring I wore that matched his own. “And thank you.”