The tears come streaming down your face ... When you lose something you can’t replace (Fix You – Coldplay)0 Reviews
Jared looked around wondering what had happened, wondering if anyone knew he was awake and speculating on Gerard’s where-abouts. He was on his own in the small hospital room where everything smelt clean and disinfected with the slight hint of flowers and fruit. Machine’s from every angle beeped and purred. Only then did he realise that his face was covered with an oxygen mask and that he was hooked up to a machine that checked his heart rate.
A doctor came into the room with a solemn look on his face. He checked the machine’s to make sure that everything was in working order and checked Jared’s chart, just before turning to leave the room. He hadn’t noticed that Jared was awake, mainly because Jared hadn’t said anything. He’d simply watched him go about his business, wondering if now was the best time to talk about what had happened. The doctor nearly reached the door when he heard the faint sound of Jared’s shaky and wavering voice.
“Wait!” Jared choked, suddenly realizing how dry his mouth was. “What’s happening? Where’s Gerard? What day is it? What happened? Did the operation go well? Where’s Gerard?” Jared was incredibly weak but needed to know the answers to all of these questions before resting.
“Calm down, Jared you need to rest.” The doctor spoke with a calm tone in his voice which put Jared at ease. “We sent Gerard home to pick up some things for you, but mainly for his own good, he’d been here for three days after your operation without sleep. So when we sent him home the first time he was back within a few hours all panicked about you, which is understandable.” The doctor could see that Jared was still anxious to know about his operation so he continued “There were some complications with your operation but you should have someone here before I tell you”
“No” Jared said with all the strength he could muster. “I need to know now. Gerard would be the only one I could hear it with and I don’t know if he can hear what you’re about to say. So please tell me now, while I’m on my own.”
“The tumour has spread throughout your body and you health is deteriorating. There’s nothing more we can do for you, because we didn’t catch the cancer in time.” The doctor sounded as if he had said this many times before but it was evident in the way he said it that the words didn’t come easily. The words didn’t seem to hit Jared. All he heard was “Nothing more we can do” and drifted away into unconsciousness.
When Jared woke up the doctor was gone and Gerard was asleep in the armchair next to his bed. It had gone from light to dark therefore from day to night. According to Jared’s clock it was five to one in the morning. He didn’t want to wake Gerard, knowing deep down that it was him that had had a worse week. He allowed himself to sleep again and before he knew it he had woken up to daylight seeping through the blinds and to the sight of Gerard pacing the room. That’s when he knew what he had to do.
“Jared, you’re awake! How’re you feeling? Do you want me to get you anything?” He asked. While rushing towards my bedside, I knew that I had to do this but it was killing me worse than any cancer could. I had to tell him and I had to see the look on his face.
“Gerard, there’s something you should know” He started, a lump forming in his throat as his heart begged him not to do this, but his head overruled. He knew this was the best thing to do, so he forced himself to do it. “It’s over”