he he... the love shows strong with these two :)
Oh my god! What have I done?! Why did I do that?! I’ve corrupted my brother! I can believe what I just did. When I entered the kitchen I shut the door and locked it. I sat against it and started crying. What am I doing? I don’t cry! Come on Gerard, you never cry. Your turning into a pansy! What the hell is wrong with you? I slapped myself and got up. I wiped my face and cleaned up my eyeliner. Yes I wear eyeliner. I took a few deep breaths and walked to the fridge. I stool tall and searched for the first aid kit on the top of the fridge. Gotcha! I mumbled. I went back over to our silver toaster and checked my face. Lucky it didn’t look like I had just been crying.
As I unlocked the door and entered the lounge again I heard mikey talking to himself. “why doesn’t gee love me anymore? He used to kiss me all the time. Well never like that. But that’s not the point. I love gee. So much I would die for him. He has no idea how much that kiss means to me. If he would let me I would do that all the time. I will never need a girlfriend or anything. I have my gee. If only he would let me in!” I was shocked. What does he mean not love him anymore?! Of course I fucking love him! I love him more than anything! He was crying softly.
I slowly walked over towards him. And sat next o him on the couch. I pulled him into a hug. “of course I love you mikey. You mean the world to me!” I shocked him a bit. He turned and snuggled into my chest. “I uv u chee.” He mumbled into me. “huh?” he pulled out, “I said I fucking love you gee!” he screamed. And covered his face as he cried. “I love you too mikey! I do!” I cooed. “not the way I love you.” What?! What did he mean by that. Maybe I wasn’t the only one who more than brother feelings. “what do you mean mikey? I don’t understand?!”
“I said I LOVE you! As in more than a brother. Gee you are my world. Why wont you let me be yours?”
“you are mikey. And you have been for years. I just, I dunno. I just couldn’t corrupt you like dad corrupted me.” He sat and stared for a moment. Shit! He didn’t know about that. “what?! What did dad do to you?”
“nothing mikey nothing. Just let me clean you up.” I got out the antiseptic and a few band-aids. “only if you tell me!” he said pulling away. “fine.” i told him to hold still. The antiseptic is going to sting. As I dabbed at his wound I began explaining. “when I was your age mikey, dad told me it was time for me to learn about life. The pain side anyway.” He wiped his face and winced at the pain. “what did he do to you?” he repeated. “uhh. At first he was beating me. With anything he could. His hands. His belt. His feet or knees. Anything. And a couple of times he actually scolded me in the shower.” I stopped. I could feel the tears coming back as I reminisced. I chocked them back, continued to clean mikey’s wound, and explain. “when mum found out. She stopped sleeping with him. And he eventually got bored with it. So he decided to get his pleasure out of me.” Mikey gasped. “oh no!” I nodded and let a single tear roll down my cheek. “he was raping me mikey. And it hurt. It hurt so bad.” I cracked. I burst into tears and collapsed into mikey. He pulled me into a hug and started rocking back and forth. “its okay gee. You can stop there. I understand now. Its ok.” I pulled away and cleared my throat, and wiped my tears away. “now do you understand when he took mum to court to get custody of us. When I had to go and testify against him. Why I didn’t want you there? I don’t want you going through that mikey. I love you way too much to ever let that happen to you.” I fell back into him and he resumed rocking back and forth. “I love you gee. I love you so god damn much.” I didn’t reply. I didn’t know what to say. There wasn’t really anything I could say.
It was about nine thirty and mikey was yawning like an elephant. “c’mon mikes. Lets go to bed.” I got up and when I turned to look at him he was asleep. He still had his glasses on and his eyeliner was beginning to smudge because his head was slowly sliding off the couch. Just as it was about to fall off I reached out and caught him. “poor thing must be knackered.” I mumbled. I decided to carry him to bed. So I turned off the TV and set the remote on top. I walked back over to mikey. He had crawled into a ball. He looked so gorgeous. I reached down and slid my hands under his armpits and lifted him off the couch and onto my chest. He automatically wrapped his legs around my waist and squeezed really tight. He draped his arms around me neck and rested his head under my chin.
As I got to the stairs descending down to the basement (our bedroom) and I felt mikey’s breath on my bare neck-skin. –lol- and shivered., so much it woke him. “what’s wrong? what happened?” I giggled in his innocence. “nothing Hun, you just breathed on my neck and gave me chills.” He smirked. “like this?” he breathed cool air on my neck and I nearly dropped him. He knew my neck is my soft spot.