Categories > Celebrities > Fall Out Boy > I'm Alright In Bed But I'm Better With A Pen
I had announced to JJ and Patrick that I was going to move, again. They of course disapproved of it. They say that it won't fix anything, that I'll still miss him. I hate them. They are right but I don't want to listen to them. I am too scared to fix the problem. Too scared that Pete will leave me for Ashlee, too scared that he'll cheat on me, again. I don't care what Patrick says, I am too scared to let myself trust Pete again.
I pulled my books, magazines and movies off the shelf and began to put them into boxes when there was someone banging on my door. Dreading who might be on the other side, I growned and opened the door.
"Joe, hey," I stepped to the side to let him in. "What's up?"
"You can't leave."
I laughed. "Not you too." I went back to my packing and Joe began to take everything back out of the boxes. "Joe, stop it! What's your deal?" I glared.
"You can't leave. I don't care if you and Pete never get back together, but you can't disappear from his life. Our the rest of ours again. Pete needs you too much and we need you around too. Half because Pete would make us insane if you were gone."
"Joe, that's sweet but I'm still going," I began packing the boxes again and Joe picked up the box and set it aside. I huffed and glared up at him.
"I won't let you move. You can't just keep running from your problems Kristin. If it's not Pete that you run from then it'll be the next guy. You're too fucking scared to take a chance on anything!" Joe was actually yelling at me and I instantly became defensive.
"Fuck off Joe! You have no idea what I am feeling right now."
Joe interrupted me. "Quit fucking feeling sorry for yourself and look at the bigger picture. You are being selfish by running away. You won't give him a chance to tell you how he feels and just be there for him. He needs you more than ever right now. His dad just had a stroke and they don't know if he's going to make it."
My jaw dropped. "What?" My voice was almost a whisper. Pete's family were practically my family.
"I came here to get you. Pete and Patrick left for Chicago an hour ago. JJ, you, Andy and me are leaving on the next flight. Pack your shit." I have never seen Joe be serious before and he kind of scared me. I turned and walked straight into my room to pack my things. I was shaking out of fear for the situation and the realization that Joe was in fact right about me. I am being foolish. I should at least hear Pete out and not shut him out of my life for good.
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I sat on the plane as we landed staring blankly ahead. I think I said maybe 2 words the entire ride. The others just stared at me. I don't think they understood what I was thinking. Once the plane came to a halt at the terminal we grabbed our carry-ons and made our way to the baggage claim. Joe turned on his phone and a text message instantly rang through.
"Shit!" Joe half whispered and dialed someone.
"Who was it?" Andy asked and JJ and I turned to Joe.
"Patrick, he said that they made it too late. I hope that's not what I think it means." Everyone gasped. This can't seriously be happening can it? "Patrick, what's going on?" Joe said as we all grabbed our bags and headed to the exit to grab a cab.
"You're joking... don't fucking play around... FUCK!" I jumped. Joe muttered somethings into the phone and began hailing a cab.
"What's going on? You can't leave us in suspense!" JJ was practically yelling at Joe.
"He didn't make it and now Pete has locked himself in his room at his parents and won't come out."
I closed my eyes. Fuck this was bad. Really bad. I couldn't cry. I needed to stay strong for Pete.
When the taxi pulled up to the house Patrick was waiting for us outside.
"Thank god you came Kristin," he hugged me. "I know that Pete will let you in. Go talk to him." I walked into the house and up the stairs to Pete's old room. We had some great memories here. Sneaking around with his parents awake and tons of laughter. Today was so different from all the previous memories. The others were at my heels at this point and waited desperately for me to knock on the door. I took a deep breath and tried to turn the knob. Still locked. I knocked at this point.
"Pete, it's me. Please let me in," I said gently and patiently awaited any sounds from behind the door. After 5 seconds I heard his feet move across the floor and the lock turn and the footsteps retreat. I opened the door and shut it behind me. Pete had curled himself into a ball on his bed and was facing the wall. I walked over and sat on the bed and put my hand on his shoulder. At first Pete brushed my hand off him. He always got like this when he was really upset. He would push people away. It was obvious that he wanted me in here or else he wouldn't have unlocked the door. I laid down next to him and pulled him close to me. He turned and burried his head in my chest and he sobbed for what seemed like hours.
I pulled my books, magazines and movies off the shelf and began to put them into boxes when there was someone banging on my door. Dreading who might be on the other side, I growned and opened the door.
"Joe, hey," I stepped to the side to let him in. "What's up?"
"You can't leave."
I laughed. "Not you too." I went back to my packing and Joe began to take everything back out of the boxes. "Joe, stop it! What's your deal?" I glared.
"You can't leave. I don't care if you and Pete never get back together, but you can't disappear from his life. Our the rest of ours again. Pete needs you too much and we need you around too. Half because Pete would make us insane if you were gone."
"Joe, that's sweet but I'm still going," I began packing the boxes again and Joe picked up the box and set it aside. I huffed and glared up at him.
"I won't let you move. You can't just keep running from your problems Kristin. If it's not Pete that you run from then it'll be the next guy. You're too fucking scared to take a chance on anything!" Joe was actually yelling at me and I instantly became defensive.
"Fuck off Joe! You have no idea what I am feeling right now."
Joe interrupted me. "Quit fucking feeling sorry for yourself and look at the bigger picture. You are being selfish by running away. You won't give him a chance to tell you how he feels and just be there for him. He needs you more than ever right now. His dad just had a stroke and they don't know if he's going to make it."
My jaw dropped. "What?" My voice was almost a whisper. Pete's family were practically my family.
"I came here to get you. Pete and Patrick left for Chicago an hour ago. JJ, you, Andy and me are leaving on the next flight. Pack your shit." I have never seen Joe be serious before and he kind of scared me. I turned and walked straight into my room to pack my things. I was shaking out of fear for the situation and the realization that Joe was in fact right about me. I am being foolish. I should at least hear Pete out and not shut him out of my life for good.
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I sat on the plane as we landed staring blankly ahead. I think I said maybe 2 words the entire ride. The others just stared at me. I don't think they understood what I was thinking. Once the plane came to a halt at the terminal we grabbed our carry-ons and made our way to the baggage claim. Joe turned on his phone and a text message instantly rang through.
"Shit!" Joe half whispered and dialed someone.
"Who was it?" Andy asked and JJ and I turned to Joe.
"Patrick, he said that they made it too late. I hope that's not what I think it means." Everyone gasped. This can't seriously be happening can it? "Patrick, what's going on?" Joe said as we all grabbed our bags and headed to the exit to grab a cab.
"You're joking... don't fucking play around... FUCK!" I jumped. Joe muttered somethings into the phone and began hailing a cab.
"What's going on? You can't leave us in suspense!" JJ was practically yelling at Joe.
"He didn't make it and now Pete has locked himself in his room at his parents and won't come out."
I closed my eyes. Fuck this was bad. Really bad. I couldn't cry. I needed to stay strong for Pete.
When the taxi pulled up to the house Patrick was waiting for us outside.
"Thank god you came Kristin," he hugged me. "I know that Pete will let you in. Go talk to him." I walked into the house and up the stairs to Pete's old room. We had some great memories here. Sneaking around with his parents awake and tons of laughter. Today was so different from all the previous memories. The others were at my heels at this point and waited desperately for me to knock on the door. I took a deep breath and tried to turn the knob. Still locked. I knocked at this point.
"Pete, it's me. Please let me in," I said gently and patiently awaited any sounds from behind the door. After 5 seconds I heard his feet move across the floor and the lock turn and the footsteps retreat. I opened the door and shut it behind me. Pete had curled himself into a ball on his bed and was facing the wall. I walked over and sat on the bed and put my hand on his shoulder. At first Pete brushed my hand off him. He always got like this when he was really upset. He would push people away. It was obvious that he wanted me in here or else he wouldn't have unlocked the door. I laid down next to him and pulled him close to me. He turned and burried his head in my chest and he sobbed for what seemed like hours.
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