Almost six years after Sara ends it with Gerard.
Ronnie had rented out Les Deux for my 31st birthday celebration, and invited all my friends and family. It really wasn't a big surprise to me, as he was not very good at being conspicuous, but none the less, I appreciated it ever so much. It was definitely bigger than my 30th birthday celebration, which we spent at home because our daughter had the flu. So, Ronnie said that my 31st birthday was a make up for the previous year.
He was sitting across the table from me, in deep conversation with my father, who had flown down with my mother for the occasion. I watched Ronnie's animated face, and smiled to myself. When he got out of rehab, almost five years ago, my life finally seemed to take shape. He became the best husband I could ever have asked for, and even more. With the birth of our child that same year, he proved that he was just as good of a father.
I took time off from my modeling to take care of my family for two years, and when I came back, things were better then ever. I left my agency, which had threatened to drop me when I took my maternity leave, and somehow got hired as a model and spokesperson for MAC, as well as with Elite Models. I had gotten to go to France, Italy, Japan. You name it, Ronnie, me, and our daughter were there.
Ronnie had started another band, which had become quite successful, but both of our main focus was our family. I was more than pleased with where my life had ended up, and so was my mother. But never in a million years had I dreamed that things would end up the way they were.
I looked over to see Ronnie, but he had disappeared to somewhere, so I got up to find it him. My attention was brought to the stage when I heard someone telling everyone to quiet down. I looked up to see Ronnie, looking gorgeous in his black outfit, sitting on a stool and holding a guitar.
"As most of you should know, I have the honour of being married to the sexy birthday girl. But what you don't know," he said, his eyes twinkling brilliantly with the stage lights, "is that we are pregnant with our second child." I laughed and smiled as people began cheering, and Ronnie’s eyes found mine. "This one's for the love that changed my life. Happy Birthday Sara."
The crowd became quiet as Ronnie began strumming the guitar, and after a few moments, I realized that he was playing "I'll Be," by Edwin McCain. Immediately, I could feel the tears developing as he sang the words, his eyes closed.
That had been our wedding song. I remember it like it was yesterday, the way he held my closely and sang the song for me. Then, watching him sing that song infront of over 200 people, made me realize how lucky I was to have him in my life. After all the struggles we had, the doubt that we wouldn't last, after all the adversity, we were still together.
As he neared the ending of the song, I joined him on stage. I felt the gaze of everyone in the room turn to me, but nothing mattered at that moment. In my mind, there was no one else in the world at that moment, and when he finished and put the guitar down, I fell into his arms, kissing him so passionately he almost fell off the stool.
"If you only knew," he whispered when he pulled away.
"Knew what?" I kissed the tip of his nose.
"That you stole my heart." He kissed me again, but my heart had started pounding so loud I could hear it in my ears, even over the house music, which had started playing again. I was thinking about the last time that Gerard and I had seen each other, when I had said to him almost those exact words.
From time to time, Gerard still crossed my mind. He always had a special place in my heart, but I no longer had those feelings towards him, which I had questioned myself about long after we last talked. I realized that when I heard that he had gotten engaged. Actually, I surprised myself at how I felt; I was happy for him. I wasn't sure if I had broken his heart beyond repair, which sounds stupid, but true. I was afraid that I had screwed with his emotions too badly. When I found out that he had ended his engagement not too long after that, I wanted to talk to him, and see how he was. Then came the bombshell: he got married to Lyn Z from MSI after one of their shows, just like we had, and only a few months after he had ended his other engagement. I wasn't sure how to feel for him then. Maybe he really was emotionally scared, maybe he couldn't figure out what he wanted, or maybe he did. There was no way for me to find out.
Ronnie pulled me off stage, and we returned to our table, everyone congratulating us, and I tried my hardest to push Gerard out of my mind.
Rowena, my manager, was sitting next to me at the table on the phone with someone trying to get me for something. She shook her head numerous times, but did not say anything, and would say, "No, no" every once in awhile. She finally got off the phone a few minutes later, and she seemed to be pleased with herself.
"What are you so happy about?" I asked, taking a sip of my virgin cocktail.
"Well, I've managed to get you a spot as a presenter at this years MTV awards," she said happily, and I sighed. She had always wanted me to do that, but to me, it was just another teen award show. It didn't interest me at all, but for some reason it was important to her.
"That's great!" I exclaimed, raising my glass. But something inside me told me that I shouldn't do it, and that nothing good would come of it.