Categories > Cartoons > Delilah and Julius > Jay Gets His Groove On!

Baby Got Back!

by I_am_Me 2 reviews

Baby Got Back is the song. Rated PG for almost grinding between D&J.

Category: Delilah and Julius - Rating: PG - Genres: Humor - Published: 2008-04-15 - Updated: 2008-04-16 - 1056 words - Complete

1Funny
Julius' door was open and music was blaring, again. Delilah was walking by when Julius poked his head out, looked left and right, then pulled Delilah into his room.

"Julius, hey!" Delilah exclaimed. "What's going on?"

"I just wanted to dance with you," he said innocently.

"Oookay," Delilah said. "So what song are we going to dance to?"

"This one," Julius said simply, and fiddled with his iPod, which was connected to the speakers.

Two girls talking came out of his speakers. A few seconds later, a faster beat came on:

"Oh, my god, Becky. Look at her butt. It is so big, ugh! She looks like, one of those rap guys' girlfriends. But, ugh! Y'know, who understands those rap guys? Ugh! They only talk to her because she looks like a total prostitute, kay? I mean, her butt is just so round, it's like, out there, I mean, ugh! Gross. Look! She's just so...BLACK!

I like big butts and I can not lie
You other brothers can't deny
That when a girl walks in with an itty bitty waist
And a round thing in your face
You get sprung, wanna pull up tough
'Cause you notice that butt was stuffed
Deep in the jeans she's wearing
I'm hooked and I can't stop staring
Oh baby, I wanna get wit'cha
And take yo pictcha
My home boys tried to warn me
But that butt you got makes (me so horny)
Ooh, rub all of that smooth skin
You say you wanna get in my Benz?
Well, use me, use me
'Cause you ain't that average groupie
I've seen her dancin'
T'hell with romancin'
She's sweat, wet
Got it goin' like a turbo 'Vette
I'm tired of magazines
Sayin' flat butts are the thing
Take the average black man and ask him that
She gotta pack much back
So, fellas! (Yeah!) Fellas! (Yeah!)
Has your girlfriend got the butt? (Hell yeah!)
Tell 'em to shake it! (Shake it!) Shake it! (Shake it!)
Shake that healthy butt!
Baby got back!

(LA face with an Oakland booty)
Baby got back!
(LA face with an Oakland booty)

I like 'em round, and big
And when I'm throwin' a gig
I just can't help myself, I'm actin' like an animal
Now here's my scandal
I wanna get you home
And, ugh, double up, ugh, ugh
I ain't talkin' 'bout Playboy
'Cause silicon parts are made for toys
I want 'em real thick and juicy
So find that juicy double
Mix-a-Lot's in trouble
Beggin' for a piece of that bubble
So I'm lookin' at rock videos
Knock kneed bimbos walkin' like hos
You can have them bimbos
I'll keep my women like Flo Jo
A word to the thick soul sistas, I wanna get with ya
I won't cuss or hit ya
But I gotta be straight when I say I wanna (oooooh)
'Til the break of dawn
Baby got it goin' on
A lot of simps won't like this song
'Cause those punks like to hit it and quit it
And I'd rather stay and play
'Cause I'm long and I'm strong

And I'm down to get the friction on
So, ladies! (Yeah!) Ladies! (Yeah!)
If you wanna roll in my Mercedes (Yeah!)
Then turn around! Stick it out!
Even white boys got to shout
Baby got back!

Baby got back!
Yeah, baby...when it comes to females, Cosmo ain't got nothin' to do with my selection. 36-24-36? Ha ha, only if she's 5'3".

So your girlfriend rolls a Honda, playin' workout tapes by Fonda
But Fonda ain't got a motor in the back of her Honda
My anaconda don't want none
Unless you got buns, hun
You can do side bends or sit-ups
But please don't lose that butt
Some brothers wanna play that "hard" role
And tell you that the butt ain't gold
So they toss it and leave it
And I pull up quick to retrieve it
So Cosmo says you're fat
Well, I ain't down with that!
'Cause your waist is small and your curves are kickin'
And I'm thinkin' 'bout stickin'
To the beanpole dames in the magazines
You ain't it, Miss Thing!
Give me a sista, I can't resist her
Red beans and rice didn't miss her
Some knucklehead tried to diss
'Cause his girls are on my list
He had game but he chose to hit 'em
And I pull up quick to get wit 'em
So ladies, if your butt is round
And you want a triple X throwdown
Dial 1-900-MIXALOT
And kick them nasty thoughts
Baby got back!
Baby got back!

(Little in the middle but she got much back)
(Little in the middle but she got much back)
(Little in the middle but she got much back)
(Little in the middle but she got much back)


By the end of the song Delilah and Julius were dancing very closely together.

"Now, wasn't that fun?" Julius asked as he wrapped his arms around Delilah, holding her close.

"Mmmhm," Delilah replied, placing her head against Julius' shoulder.

Another song came on, "Promiscuous" by Nelly Furtado. Delilah and Julius started to slowly dance to it. Suddenly, the door banged open, and Nosey and Zoe came in.

"Hey, Julius, I was just wondering if I could, uh..." Nosey trailed off as he took in Delilah and Julius dancing.

Zoe blushed. "Oh my Carlisle. I'm so sorry. We totally should have knocked. Um, Nosey and I will just...go..." She then pulled Nosey out the still open door and closed it behind her.

Delilah and Julius looked at each other with one eyebrow raised.

"Well, that was interesting," Julius said.

"Uh-huh," Delilah agreed. "Let's just keep dancing."

"Okay," Julius replied, and they did.

(a/n: I'm baaack! I've had this chapter done for a while, but I didn't get around to posting it. I have another fanfic planned. Each D&J gets a song from "Hairspray" and they act it out. At first the songs will be disconnected, but as the fanfic goes on, I'll rearrange it in the order that the songs are supposed to be in. The first one is "You Can't Stop the Beat," which is mostly Delilah's song, and it's mostly written. I just have to finish writing in the song lyrics and actions in, then I'll post it.)
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