(#) Kitia 2007-08-17
I liked it. I think maybe, if you were going for the 'moving' type, you could add a little more about his feelings after/during when he shot those people, y'know? and some sentences are missing some punctuation as well, but other than that, I liked it! :D
Author's response
Hi thanks! Well pretty much the plan was to write the basics here and let feedback govern the edit if that makes sense :)