I think you are getting better at including details as the story continues. So just keep going as you are and add some more details if you feel they are needed. If you aren't certain I can always give you a 'detail check' before you post. My email is Ellen2484@hotmail.com.
Author's response
Thank you for your help i really really appreciate it, a lot seriosuly...uhh here be my e mail mabarber1982@hotmail.com