I'm thoroughly enjoying this story so far. It's great to see the lesser used characters having larger roles.
The only gripe I have is how you left out the date at the 'Theme Park'. I imagine that would be quite the spectacle for Daphne and Hannah. No matter though. That's very minor.
Can't wait for more.
scaryisntit
Author's response
- Oh I wrote the Theme Park... It was unreadable. I worked on it for a week, then edited for another week, then cut my losses and posted the story without it. The only decent scene was Harry winning the large purple rabbit by cheating at a rigged game...