A couple of things come to mind with this chapter. First, I liked it. Good update. Second, you’re playing a bit with Harry/Hermione shippers here. Not only with the conversation between Harry and Hermione’s father and what Harry thinks of her but with providing what happened with your description of Remus’ interaction with the story and Albus’ immediate knee-jerk reaction to the drunken story telling. You had Albus obliviate them and make tweaks to character traits. I’m curious as to what would happen should Harry have Ron and Hermione’s memories restored, as well.
Would Ron still have dated Hermione without the modifications? Would Hermione’s feeling have been for Ron or would they have developed for Harry?
You have to have another confrontation between Harry and Remus. This is a given. He needs to pay for his crime of not being a friend to Lily, James and Sirius through lack of action.
Last, the bit with Daphne was predictable and completely presumable the letter was a Father’s reaction to Harry having interest in his daughter but not on his terms. You didn’t go into much detail in regards to the letter so I would have to assume that it was in Daphne’s hand-writing. I’ve read the reviews for this chapter as you’re one that does, not only read your reviews but usually responds to them as well.
Most of your reviews are centered on the relationship issue but you had a lot more things happen here than just the letter. I do hope that you continue to work on your subplots and keep them fresh.
Your Tonks is a great character and a good Big Sister for Harry. I do hope that she gets involved with Harry a bit more in the story as far as pranks and whatnot. Your initial utilization of her was good and I hope that she pops in more often and not just in flash backs unless you’ve got a forward view in the current time frame.
Geovanni Luciano
Author's response
- Harry's friendship with Hermione is a little tease directed at those who evidently became ill at the thought of Ron and Hermione becoming intimate...
- As far as Dumbledore's tampering, it will become clear later that the memory blocks on all three were removed (at Harry's expense), but he personality modifications were not. By this time they had been living the persons the mods encouraged for three years, who know what they would have been like with that removed. All three had a far too intense sense of self to risk it.
- I'm trying to keep the story fresh and light without too much angst, but there has to be some (they are after all teens) Daphne's story will be told next chapter.
- Tonks will be in the next chapter, rest assured.