This is well done and your English has obviously improved.
As to the point of view, thank you for using third person. All of those first person POV's are irritating as hell.
I think what Michelle meant was that since this story, so far, has been told through Yami Bakura's thoughts, it might be nice to see what Kaiba thinks, for a change.
Whether you continue this or not, it's a good one.
Author's response
Well, I feel appropriately stupid for not having figured out what Michelle meant for myself g
Thank you very much for the review!