(#) BenRG 2008-09-25
That was a very good chapter, Clell. For all it was slow-paced, it really contained some golden character moments.
I particularly liked Neville's conversation with Hermione and also Harry and Daphne trying to work out what the hell they are supposed to do now. As Harry said, he isn't good at planning ahead. Griffindors charge forwards, after all. He is going to need Daphne to teach him cunning (or at least supply her own to any strategic discussions). Of course, compensating for the deficiencies of one's mate is one of the roles of a wife or husband.
I like how you portray Hermione in this story. For all she is a very intelligent young woman, she is not overwhelmingly smart in real terms. She needs someone dilligent and caring to protect her from her naievette and who better than a noble-born Hufflepuff?
The bit with Ron was funny. I wonder if the Weasleys are planning a poorly-thought-out and ultimately self-defeating counter attack.
Things are working towards a conclusion. I'm looking forward to the final exposure and ruinatino of Dumbledore for all his many crimes. We also need to see how Lord and Lady Potter settle into their new roles.
BenRG's Rating: 8/10
Author's response
- Most of my stuff is slow paced... Much like myself.
- It always seemed to me that with the culture that canon showed (and fanon amplified) someone like Neville would have been raised to take no crap off anyone
- I've never cared for stories that have a couple pair up and start finishing each others sentences (except for the Twins of course), like most new couples (Hell, like many new marriages) Harry and Daphne are basically strangers.
- It has often been noted that being highly intelligent doesn't necessarily make one smart. What ever else Hermione is, she is a dedicated follower of the rules, bringing her into Harry's secret is a risk. It always seemed to me that while Hermione has a fair amount in common with Harry (several orders of magnitude more than she has in common with Ron) she would have far more in common with a Muggle born with a normal upbringing.
- Ron's not done
- I'm planning on chapter 14 to be the final...