Nice work, the story line was good, i have always looked for stories where Harry ends his life... this one worked out well... a few inconsistencies in places, and the end scene was a bit hard to follow without knowing more about the spell harry used.... also the extend of harry and hermione's relationship was a bit confusing.
i look forward to you actually expanding on this story, or continuing into the future, where you can use Harry's dreams and thoughts to reflect on his previous life.
anyway, nice work... and it would be good to see more.