Well, that's an attention-getting introduction to your story. I do like the presence of that "little voice" in Harry's mind, though I do wonder about it. I'd suspect it was Tommy-boy, save that it mentioned something muggle like yogurt in a good light and I can't see him doing that; which leaves lots of interesting possibilities that have great potential to confound Albus' plans, even more so that what Sirius' actions already have.
I quite like it so far, bar the readability issues already mentioned.