FicWad

I just read through the other reviews and want to add my own two knuts. Go Easy On The Harem! It's bloody easy to get carried away, and then you have a bunch of people to keep track of, and reviewers complaining about how their favourites don't get enough screentime and such. Four is a workable number, five is half a phonebook. Take it from an experienced screwer-upper, who's suffering the writer's block from hell because of it.
Rain: It feels rushed. Sometimes it feels like you are writing a Reader's Digest of your own work. That extra shine isn't so hard to add. Just a little would go a long way. This chapter wasn't so bad, but you did go full-length (by me, anyway,)this time. you could slow it down and paint a fuller picture.
Sunshine: It's an amusing story, there's enough little twists to make it interesting and i like it when Harry makes teen mistakes. He shouldn't have announced himself to Fumbledore at all. Yes, there's plenty of clichés but i really don't mind. Good plot devices gets repeated, and while they're called clichés after a while, it doesn't change the fact that they are good devices. It's the story version of pasta. The repetitiveness of the love potion staple can easily be mitigated by finding a novel way to deal with it. Ah, that's enough for now. My @ is in my profile.
Thanks.
Vanir