Wow, don't you just love it when people review your story so they can dictate the "right" way you should be writing it?
Because obviously they know so much better.
Although I will say this: Jimmy Carr isn't the worst role model you could have for a Harry Potter who has put away childish things. The fact that people constantly talk down to him leaves them wide open for sarcasm, cynicism, condescension, and vocal doubting of their sexual orientation.
Again, I'm against the idea of telling an author they don't know how to write their own story, but I'm also a hypocrite and I'm completely unable to keep any ideas I have to myself when I write reviews.
Blessed be,
-Brother Bludgeon