Well, this story is certainly... interesting. I think the idea of a My Chemical Romance version of Mamma Mia! is hilarious. Some of the chapters are kind of hard to read, and there are some mistakes in grammar/punctuation; like, when there's dialogue, each time a new person speaks, it should be a new paragraph. Overall, I think the concept of the story is pretty good, but it's not carried out very well. It could potentially be a great story, but it needs "work".
Author's response
I did the mistakes on purpose. I'm the druggie, havent you read my other stories? but thanks anyway bitch.
P.S You fat.