First, it's good to sse you are still writing, I have enjoyed your work, even when it's dark.
some of the reviewers have what they see as valid criticisms, and as such, is their right, but those of course are like opinions, everyone has one..
sure, it could be seen as cliche, so what, ever watch TV, it's all one big cliche, and there are shows on for years doing the same dang thing.. so, forget the cliche thing.
what I see most commented on is the arrival of the shades.. I don't particularly see that as a problem, it may be the plot device, but it works, it may be on the extreme end of the scale, but then consider Harry's life, he's always been on the extreme ends..
The ballet of death?, quite nicely choreographed.
Faults?, I will admit to being mildly biased, but my only negative criticism is the end.. it doesn't indicate if the story goes any further, but then, it doesn't need to.. in actuality, it shouldn't, unless there is a scene where the restored family(s) is seen in Avalon
Leave it as it is, it's a good story, and on my list of favorites.
TimW
Read my stories at:
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/twilliams1797_stories/
Author's response
Heya Tim.
Thanks for the praise.
Yeah, I know. Each reviewer, good or bad, helps my writing get better. I don't take offense, because I've written some rather harsh reviews myself.
As I said before, there really isn't much new under the sun. All we can do is polish the stones and see what we can make shine. When I wrote this, it hadn't yet become Cliche.
The shades: It's funny. I thought that would be a unique and interesting way to end this. Ah well.
Ballet of death...I like that. Hollywood, here I come!
I really couldn't do much for afters. Harry riding off into the sunset across the back of a Valkyrie would royally hack off my primary choice of partner for him, Hermione. Ginny would also blow a gasket, and so...
Someone once called me the master of guillotine endings, and I tend to think of them as the perfect way to finish a story.
Thanks for the invite, Tim. I've joined your group.
Alorkin