I quite enjoyed this story, but I was a little surprised at the "ending". Since the story was marked as complete (and since it is your most recent story on this site), I had expected an actual ending, rather than a note saying the next part would be "coming soon".
That issue aside, I think you did very well with the charaterisations of the main canon characters. I enjoyed the dressing-down Susan gave Hermione, too, and the way you portrayed her.
I was also amused by the bit in this chapter with Harry and the cottage for the two centaurs, and jumped to the same conclusion an earlier reviewer did. It is decidedly ironic for Harry to accidentally solve his own problem he had accidentally gotten himself into with Laurel, and not realize that he had solved it, much less had had the problem in the first place.