wow, this was really good, i loved it. i think you should prob get a beta reader (someone who reads over each chapter for grammar and spelling mistakes, etc.) or maybe read it over a few times yourself, it'll make it even better than it already is, and it'll make it easier for ppl to read
i hope you don't think i'm yelling at you or something, i'm just giving you some constructive criticism. it's a really great story, keep up the great work and update soon!
Author's response
oh yeah sorry i am a really bad at spelling.. lol
and thanks i can always use constructive criticism.. i will try to improve...But english is hard when its not your first Language teehee.
and i am glad you liked it so far .. just wait it gets worse lol ...thanks =)))